My North Star

You don't have to live a long life to live a good life.

Some of us don't start off with ideal circumstances, but each of us has the power to change the ending of our story. When we adopt animals, we have the power to give someone a second chance and hold space for something better.

Today, it's not uncommon to hear that most people prefer the company of animals to humans. Why? Because animals have shown us unconditional love and loyalty for lifetimes. When we often want to lose faith in love, animals inspire us to let go of guilt and shame and live in the present moment.

Nature has always been my teacher, and I'm honored to be able to share the story of one of my favorite teachers of all time, and now ascended master - Hoku.

Hoku's arrival and passing were both un-expecting and sudden. It was a beautiful summer day, July of 2016. It was my birthday.

We were on the highway driving home and about to pass the Humane Society on the left. I had the instantaneous desire to visit the shelter and see the animals. He hadn't been to the humane society yet so I thought it was the perfect opportunity to bring him. We had no intention of adopting when we arrived, but we followed spontaneity and intuition.

A few minutes after walking through the kennels, he called me over to see a small spotted dog with shining blue eyes. The first thing I noticed was her eyes that glimmered like blue diamonds. Around her right eye, she had a black pirate patch with matching black ears. She had a funny frame with short legs and a long torso like a dachshund. Paired with black and white spotted fur like an Australian shepherd or heeler. Needless to say more, I was in love!

We kept her name "Hoku" which has several meanings, but my favorite being "star" in Hawaiian. Her eyes were not only strikingly bright blue but also filled with so much life. When we got in the kennel with her, she was friendly and engaged. Within a few minutes, we ended up calling the rest of his family that we lived with to meet her.

We asked the staff what landed Hoku at the shelter in the first place. We were surprised when they told us she had been brought in twice. The first time because she had her way with the neighbors' chickens. The second time because her owners relocated to an apartment on the mainland, and they wanted Hoku to have access to the outdoors. Hoku had been at the shelter for a few months. The staff who worked with her all agreed that she was a great dog and would be an amazing addition to the right family.

At the end of our visit, his mom gave us the okay to bring her home. I was elated. I sat in the passenger alongside his mom driving, Hoku in the backseat. Hoku hopped her front paws on the middle compartment and placed her head softly on his mom's shoulder as if she was saying thank you. She left her head there for most of the ride home.

When we arrived home and brought her inside it didn't take long before she found a way to bolt out the door. She was a runner - and it was clear she wanted to be free. She had short legs but they were so fast! She ran through yards and under cars, down the block, and back to the house. When I got back to the porch I took a moment to catch my breath. I watched Hoku stand at the doorway with her tongue hanging out with a smile. From then on, I knew I wanted to give her a life where she could be the freest.

Our adventures together have been truly epic. I brought her everywhere. To my favorite coffee shops, on every hike, to the ocean to see dolphins, on the river, to the jungle to chase waterfalls, and above the clouds among the Ironwood trees, and before she passed, we hiked up one of the tallest mountains on earth. She was my rock. Where ever she was, I was home.

Hoku had her quirks her too. One of my favorite examples of Hoku's character took place a few years ago, on a night of experimental love-making. My partner and I were playing around with BDSM. I had a blindfold on and was bent over the bed with my legs spread open.

My partner paused for a moment and laughed softly, so I asked "what's going on?" He chuckled and said something along the lines of, "there's a silent protester..." Hoku sat quietly between us with a concerned look on her face. She wanted to trust us, but she also wasn't sure what was going on. We reassured her I was safe and she relaxed and left us to our games. It warmed my heart that she was always looking after me.

Hoku also had a gift for disarming people with her gentle and relaxed nature. She was adored by all. It was common for people to stop us on walks to tell me how beautiful and sweet Hoku was. There was a time Hoku and I attended a beach party and she wandered off indulging in all the scents. When I finally got a hold of her, she had eaten a young girl's burrito. I was embarrassed and anticipated consequences. The girl thought Hoku was so cute she held no resentment and continued to hug and pet Hoku. I laughed and realized that day she always got the free pass.

Her happiness was contagious. She wasn't afraid to have a good time with people and without. When she saw that I was preoccupied with something, she would reach for her toy and throw it around and to herself. When I saw her do this for the first time I realized how carefree she was. Hoku was also entertaining to watch when we brought her over to play with other dogs. Somehow she always made her way to sneakily hump one of the contesting alphas. She lit up my whole world.

Hoku was a dream come true. The best friend and the love of my life. She gave me hope at a time where I felt lost. She ignited in me a sense of purpose for play and adventure. Knowing she was home waiting for me kept me out of trouble. She was the north star that always pointed me home. Her presence brought me comfort and endless joy. We had a brilliant run. I will always love watching our adventures play in my mind.

Just like she unexpectedly came, she unexpectedly departed. Just a few weeks after some epic camping and family adventures, out of the blue Hoku suddenly began showing irregular symptoms. They were seemingly mild and not urgent. She seemed so healthy and full of life. We had no idea what was really going on.

On the evening of February 6th, 2021, we took Hoku to the Vet for an urgent visit. That evening, I came home to Hoku showing signs of edema, a watery, fluid filling in her chest area. The vet assured us that it's most likely parasites and that the medication should help and if anything bring her back tomorrow. When we returned home we gave her the shot. In twenty minutes or so her breathing started to change and I knew something was really wrong. We brought her to sleep between us in bed.

Around 4 am on Sunday morning, we woke up with Hoku frozen between us. A sudden and tragic mystery. We buried her under the crescent moonlight and stars. I sat next to her for a while and watched the sunrise. It was a beautiful coral pink sky. I was tender hearted but so grateful she went as peacefully as she could at home and with us.

Later that day we called the doctor, he had tears in his voice and shared his condolences and lab findings with us. He said Hoku had unfortunately been one of three other dogs that died that day of cancer. Her blood labs show signs of a rare on-set of hemangiosarcoma. If she hadn't gone the way she did, the alternative reality would be surgery and chemo-therapy but eventually, cancer will take over. It wouldn't have ended well in Hoku's favor either eay. At that moment I trusted Hoku knew best.

Three days later, I had a beautiful dream that Hoku stopped midway on her staircase to heaven to jump back into my arms for one last cuddle and walk. She gave me the peace-of-mind that she’s found her way home.

On the journey of being with Hoku, I have learned the true importance of belonging, connection, and caring for self and others.

The magic and miracles of our lives often disguise themselves in the mundane. Hoku was a guiding light, reminding me to stay present, and excited for all that life has to offer.

This year I spent Valentine’s Day celebrating life with people I love, doing the things I love, in a place that I love. Yet, discovering a new layer of love. The tender and raw space of grieving the loss of someone you love. It’s been almost two months since my best friend and fur baby Hoku passed away. I have been blessed with five years of connection, companionship, adventure, play, and unconditional love.

The past two months have been filled with chaos and grief, but also opportunity and awakening. Grief allows me to experience the space of loving so deeply. It reminds me to honor and revere life in all of its seasons and cycles.

Hoku shared many lessons with me, but a few that have become more apparent at this time of my life. I wanted to share them with you now.

7 things I learned from Hoku:

1. Play every day and you’ll never get old.

2. Don’t be afraid to play with yourself and have a blast doing it!

3. Be the most welcoming and loving person you know and you’ll have family everywhere.

4. Know home and you’ll be free to roam.

5. You can do a good job and have fun doing it too.

6. Take time to soak up the sunlight.

7. You can tame the instincts but never lose the wild.

To all of those who are considering adopting or rescuing a pet, I encourage you to own your power and responsibility as an owner.

To all of those who have given someone a second chance by adoption and rescue, thank you!

To all of those who have lost loved ones during the pandemic, my heart is with you.

May you find solace and comfort in the presence of your loved ones.

May we keep their memories in our hearts and trust that love lives on.

May we live life with full appreciation and gratitude knowing that all we have is this moment.

Thank you for reading.

Love,

Dion