Four legged love!

Todd, my significant other, and I were living together for about two years when he had a bug in his bonnet for a dog, a pooch, a four-legged friend. My daughter had graduated from college and was out on her own. Todd is divorced with three kids who visit us a few times a month on the weekends. So, at times, the house can get noticeably quiet. I was working long hours and he said it was lonely at home waiting for me. I was working at the hospital full time and then in private practice for an additional ten to fifteen hours a week. There were nights that I would not get home until seven or eight o’clock and he didn’t complain about my working, he just had a burning desire to have a friend to wait with him.

Honestly, I was so grateful that I found a man who did not mind my passion for work, that I was compelled to grant the wish for the dog. I said “Yes,” and he went on his adoption search. His favorite breed is the American pit bull terrier. My last dog was the same breed. Her name was Shiloh. She was well behaved, loyal, and cuddly. My only complaint was the response I would get out walking her in the state parks. There is this unfortunate overt discrimination against the breed. People would see her and pull their children a bit closer, inch their dogs away and offer a fearful gaze.

I understood that look. I am Black. My ex-husband is Black too, Todd is white. Honestly, it offers a different experience. I remember walking through the grocery store with my ex-husband and an elderly woman clutched her pocketbook and exited the aisle when she saw us together. When you are Other, you start to understand the movements of the afraid. But, I agreed to another pit bull. After all, I understand discrimination and learned to navigate this with a degree of grace and dignity.

We found Max on Facebook. Todd had an old high school friend who was working fourteen-hour days and he was unable to care for the dog in the manner he deemed appropriate. He shared that Max was six years old, with a mellow disposition and a kind heart. The post represented an adorable, medium sized, short haired, milk chocolate brown terrier with eyes that are easy to melt into. My first thought was, he looks sweet. We should go meet him.

Off we went on a 45-minute drive to meet him halfway between our homes in the parking lot of a small shopping center that included a McDonalds and a Stop and Shop. Max leapt out of the truck on a leash with a wagging tail that could power a small town. He was eager to meet us and ready to go. We fell in love instantly. Tim started to have second thoughts about letting Max go. I could see the water forming in his eyes as he asked about our house. We are avid hikers and assured him that Max would spend weekends in the woods on long walks. Tim shared that he didn’t have time to spend with him and hiking wasn’t something that he could offer Max. “I know it is the right thing to do, but this is really hard.” Tim looked away to avoid tears and Todd bargained and the next thing you know he was in our VW Jetta and on his way to a new world.

Max has been with us for two years and miles of hiking trails. Last year when Todd was fishing the Salmon River in Pulaski, New York, Max, and I would head to the Winona State Forest for long hikes that would span eight to ten miles. The three of us have hiked most of the Mattabesset Trail. It might sound odd, but I think Max can catch my ideas in the thought field. All I must do is think about hiking and he sits straight up and starts to wag that tail. I do not know how he can sense it, but he often knows that we are going for a hike seconds after the thought graces my brain. When I put on my hiking pants he starts to talk and when the boots come out, he is nearly beside himself.

Things have changed over the past two years. I left my job at the hospital and I work in my private practice full time. With the pandemic, I work from home with great regularity. Max could not believe his good luck when the pandemic took off and we were both home quite a bit. Todd was out of work for 5 weeks and I was home often. What started as a companion for Todd while I was at work ended up being a new family member with a great personality. Like all of us, we have our quirks. Max snores like someone who needs a C-pap machine. It can be so loud that it often brings us to laughter.

Being a pit bull is not Max’s fault any more than I can control that I am Black. He cannot help that he looks stout and capable, but he does not deserve the fearful frowns. He is a lap dog at home, he enjoys cuddling and playing frisbee. He is kind and generous. Society can call him a bully breed if they must, but he is warm hearted, pleasant, and full of unconditional love.