You’re Not Broken — You’re Becoming
The pain you feel isn’t proof of your failure. It’s the pressure of transformation. Give yourself permission to grow through it.

We live in a world obsessed with perfection. Curated images flood our feeds, highlighting wins, glow-ups, and peak moments. But what about the in-between? What about the raw, unfiltered process of becoming?
Let me tell you a story.
There was a time in my life when everything fell apart. A relationship I thought would last forever crumbled overnight. My job, which I had poured years of effort into, vanished in a round of layoffs. My health took a nosedive, anxiety gnawed at me, and I could barely get out of bed some days.
I remember looking in the mirror and seeing someone I didn’t recognize. My face was tired, my eyes dim. I whispered to myself, “What is wrong with you?” I truly believed I was broken — damaged beyond repair.
But I wasn’t. And neither are you.
What I didn’t understand back then is that breaking isn’t always the end. Sometimes it’s the beginning.
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The Cocoon
Think about a caterpillar. It doesn’t become a butterfly by simply growing wings. First, it dissolves. It literally breaks down inside a cocoon, turning into a soupy mess of cells before reassembling into something new.
That messy middle? That’s what I was in.
It’s what many of us are in when we’re convinced we’re failing or falling apart.
But you’re not broken — you’re becoming.
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Pain is a Sign of Growth
We’re taught to avoid pain. To see it as a red flag. But in nature, pain is a sign of growth. Muscles ache when they grow. Seeds break before they bloom. Skin stretches to accommodate life.
So why do we shame ourselves for feeling uncomfortable or lost?
I look back on those hard years now, and I don’t see a broken woman. I see someone being remade. The job I lost made space for the career I have now — one that aligns with my values and passions. The relationship that ended? It pushed me to love myself more deeply, so I could attract the love I truly deserved. Even my anxiety forced me to slow down, to listen to my body, and to create a life that supports my peace instead of stealing it.
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You’re Allowed to Fall Apart
Let’s normalize the breakdown.
Let’s normalize crying in the car, needing space, taking breaks, asking for help, and feeling lost. That’s not weakness. That’s humanness.
You are allowed to fall apart — not because you’re weak, but because you’re building something stronger.
You don’t owe the world a polished version of yourself. You owe yourself compassion. Grace. Time.
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The Other Side
Here’s what I know now: Nothing was ever wrong with me. I wasn’t broken. I was shedding. Shedding beliefs that didn’t serve me. Relationships that weren’t real. Identities that weren’t mine. I was becoming someone new — someone freer, wiser, stronger.
And so are you.
Whatever storm you’re in, hold on. You’re not being punished. You’re being prepared.
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A New Story
Start telling yourself a new story:
You’re not broken. You’re in transition. You’re not a failure. You’re in formation. You’re not lost. You’re exploring.
Becoming isn’t beautiful all the time. But it’s sacred. And you’re allowed to be a work-in-progress.
You’re allowed to rest. To cry. To rebuild. To rediscover.
One day, you’ll look back and realize that the moments you thought were your undoing were actually your becoming.
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