Twenty Twenty Won.

As much buzz as we can get these days, from (at least) Zoom with your coworkers, FaceTimes with foreign friends or non scheduled meeting with your ex at the grocery store (of course with your makeupless face)... Seems like all of it starts with these seven little words, perfectly packed into "So what are your plans for this year?" question that, well, at least some have the answer to.

Since all of the above scenarios are completely familiar to me and I somehow wish the last one with the ex at the store wouldn't happen... I was kind of glad it did. As much as I wanted to get out of the small talk situation, (especially since I was literally holding tampons in one and a bottle of wine in the other hand), the question he popped got me thinking. What ARE my plans for this year?

I've always been a fan of lists. Guest lists, to-do post-its, motivational quotes lists and nonetheless - the famous "Goals" lists (with a capital G). However, even though I make them every year, excited to start fresh and motivated to do the work... Last year the work nor the list actually worked for me. As I glanced through the "2020 Goals" headline I made with pink glitters (yes, I make pink lists with gangsta rap playing in the background) and shiny markers, I went through 2 pages of precisely decorated goals only to... tick off the two of them.

As much as I am a fan of lists, I am an even bigger one of smashing my goals (I mean, who isn't?!). Somehow, my head that I so persistently keep in the clouds, makes me dream beyond the cloud line. Every damn year. And believe it or not, I surprisingly (and more often than not- unconsciously) tick most of my goals at the end of the year. To be honest, I am not quite sure if it has anything to do with the list, but as long as I get to keep making lists AND smashing my goals at the same time, I'm happy. Except by the end of 2020. That one hit differently. All of us.

Different in a way that made us look closer and deeper into our lives and choices. Not everything we did was directed into "looking perfect" and "getting things done" while running crazy all over the place. Last year we were bound to the thoughts we usually try to escape from. We were also bound to accept our feelings, acknowledge them and make moves we never did before to make ourselves happy and calm. Stress got a whole 'nother meaning that had little to do with running late and catching deadlines, relationships were put on trial and many of us found ourselves jobless after years. Hence even the shiniest list didn't work.

Looking back, somehow even our goals reached another level. I might tick only the two off my list, but I've learned and mastered patience (boy, 2020 took a lot of patience). I've found joys in baking muffins on a Sunday, doing yoga every day and experienced being free in December that used to be the craziest work month every year. I've spent more time in nature than I usually do. I've learned that distance means nothing when relationships are strong and consistent. I lost people, a relationship and (re)gained connection(s). The most important one with myself.

Myself and many others (I'm sure) were faced with new self doubts that came to the surface during a pandemic. But, as they say; the only way to get over it, is to get through. So we did. We got through 2020 with a bunch of lessons. Not goals, but lessons- and none of them were listed. Because just like most things in life, the most important lessons come from unexpected battles.

It is now up to us to take the victory, new knowledge and adjust to the measures of "the new normal". The one that puts taking care of our souls as a number one priority. If you ask me, last year was one hell of a challenge. Nobody can guarantee this year will be better, the only thing we can be sure of, is that we can be prepared.

In 2021 we can be ready to stay calm in the most devious storms, find new ways to get up on our feet and keep perfecting our new found potentials. Bring out the hustle when needed, ask for advice when lost and learn to stay present in unpredictable times. Finally take little leaps of faith, keep our feet on the ground and head in the clouds. And nonetheless- don't forget to keep moving forward even when it feels like crawling.

This year might not bring certainty at its finest, but we can make adjusted plans to take little steps ahead with more confidence than ever before. Twenty twenty gave us the vision, but twenty twenty one smells like new personal victories.

A year from now, I'm claiming to shout "In twenty twenty one, I won". Now let's get it.