Times You Should be A Little Selfish in Life

When growing up, we were told never to be selfish but always put others first but as an adult, you will realize that this mindset will put you in more harm than good. While living a selfless life is admirable, sometimes being a little selfish is essential to your survival and well-being. Psychology has proven that constantly putting others first can lead to burnout, damaged mental health, and resentment. Below are 7 periods when you should be a little selfish to maintain a balanced and fulfilled life.

1. When Your Personal Growth is at Stake

Self-care is doing anything that will make you happy, recharge your body and soul, and help you maintain a balanced lifestyle.

Sometimes you need to take a step forward where you may have to leave your close friends behind to gain new experiences, build a career, and grow. This does not make you selfish, your personal growth sometimes can be more important than certain relationships.

Stepping out of your comfort zone does not mean you should disconnect completely from your friend's network, though it may seem selfish it is much needed for your growth.

2. You are Beginning to Burn Out

The demands of life can make you emotionally and physically drained and burnout can creep on you before you know it.

Burnout can creep on you fast, leading to stress and feelings of helplessness. According to psychology, it is in this situation you need to start showing yourself self-compassion. Prioritizing your own needs means self-preservation and not being selfish.

It means you recognize you are not a machine, but you need time to rejuvenate and recharge. It is okay to say “No” to that extra task when you are on the brink of burnout.

3. When You Need to Set Boundaries

There are times when it is extremely hard to say No! It is that moment when you have taken more than you can handle just to avoid disappointing someone. The issue with this is that you can’t be everything to everyone, and you shouldn’t try to be, hence boundaries are crucial to maintaining your wellbeing.

Setting your rules of engagement or boundaries may appear selfish in the beginning, the reason is that you are telling others what you can’t put up with. But remember, it’s not selfish to protect your mental health and inner peace.

One reality you should know is that people will treat you, how you allow them to treat you and people will always cross your path knowingly or unknowingly when you don’t set boundaries.

4. When Ending a Toxic Relationship

Ending a toxic relationship especially when the other person has been a significant part of your life, is never easy. A relationship that is toxic to your mental health and inner peace is not worth keeping, and staying in one because you don’t want to appear selfish is not healthy for your well-being.

Walking away from a toxic relationship is one of the bravest decisions you will have to make at some point. You deserve to be loved and respected and when a relationship doesn’t offer these, you need to take a bold step and let go.

5. When Investing in Self Care

Self-care is things or steps you take to recharge you and make you happy. We often neglect self-care because we are too busy taking care of others or trying to meet deadlines. But in the end, we feel guilty when we suffer a breakdown in the process of trying to meet up with our daily obligations.

Psychology has proven that self-care is important to our overall well-being, and we are better equipped to handle life challenges when we take self-care seriously. Don’t hold back next time you want to take that “Me time”.

Bottom Line

If the scenarios highlighted above resonate with you, it's time you re-evaluate the thin line between self-care and selflessness. Being a little selfish should not be a flaw, it should be part of resuscitating your mental wellbeing. It begins with self-awareness and knowing when to stop putting others first at the detriment of your peace and happiness. Learn to identify decisions that align with your values and boundaries and you should know if you are sacrificing enough for yourself as you do for others.