Time To Take Control

You may find yourself asking, "Why me?" when something in your life turns troubling. I have always asked myself this question, until one day something dawned on me. Life is always going to happen to us, no matter what. There is no precaution in life, you just have to flow with it. Plans are not meant to stick. I was doing online college courses in the fall of 2019. I was in a toxic relationship struggling to finish assignments already, then COVID-19 became present in all of our lives. All classes became online through Zoom, but it had became far too much far too early. I quit. I have been mad at myself for so long, but then it hit me. I can go back to school. Nothing is stopping me, just myself. The past couple of weeks, I have seen countless Graduation posts all over every social media one can own. That would have been me, if I had just stuck it through and never gave up. I thought to myself, this also could have been me next year, and the year after. Yet, I moped around and never thought, "Hey, there's always next year." I held myself back for so long, purely based on how I reacted to life. I am in control, no one else.

Today, my mindset has changed. Flat tire? Oh shoot, at least I don't have to pay $80 for a new one, let's just patch it up. Running low on money? Well, I did eat out a lot this week, I will work extra next week. Instead of letting things get to me, I look at the bright side. I understand that in a dark space, light is very dim but it is always there. Look for it. Strive for that bright place. The more and more positive energy you bring towards yourself will only benefit you. Your way of thinking, your reactions, your stress-levels, everything will be positively effected by a simple change of mindset. I have been looking for a WFM (work from home) job for the past 5 months. It has been a struggle but I have another job, I truly cannot complain because I still have my apartment, still have my car, still have a full belly. Just because I am currently not doing something I enjoy, doesn't mean it is the end of the world. Many people work a job they despise, but until you look at the bright side, you will forever despise that job. It may be the worst job in the world, but at least you're not cleaning out port-a-potties. Oh, you are? At least you aren't cleaning out a bio-hazard crime scene in the blazing heat. That's not really the point, it doesn't matter what you do, happiness is found anywhere. It's time to take control. Make a change, do not settle. Changes don't just happen to people everyday, if a change is what you want; make it happen. Take control of your own life.

The cycle you wish to get out of will continue to loop until a change occurs. Changes do not have to be quitting your job and moving to another city, but it could be just small things. What kind of change are you searching for? Whether it be a healthier lifestyle, a better career, stopping a bad habit, it is all possible only by YOU. It all starts with YOU. Falling back is easy and familiar, but is it really where you want to be? Nothing that was ever good, came easy. Release yourself of anger, judgement, and jealousy. Seek higher meanings, think before you speak and most importantly: Be nice to yourself. Talking yourself down constantly is just reassuring your subconscience that this is how you think you are, and your brain naturally has a pull to prove itself right; for confirmation, you know? Everyone likes reassurance, even your brain. Do not reassure your brain of something you are not. Speak highly of yourself. Manifest or pray, whatever it is that you do, do it more. Tell yourself you're doing great, because you are. Talk to yourself EXACTLY how you'd liked to be talked to. I hype myself up when I get ready and get myself in a good mood, because I will not let my very much unknown days left in this lifetime, being spent sad. I want to spend it with the people I love, family, just LIVING. You do too, so do it. Do not let yourself, hold yourself back. Time to take control.