The Only One Holding You Back Is You

We love to believe that life’s obstacles are external.
Not enough time.
Not enough money.
Not enough support.
Not enough luck.

It’s comforting to point at something outside ourselves and say, “That’s why I’m stuck.”
It allows us to protect our ego, to avoid the painful idea that maybe, just maybe, we are the ones standing in our own way.

For a long time, that was my favorite excuse too.
Until one day, life forced me to admit the uncomfortable truth:
The only person holding me back… was me.


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Blaming the World

I used to think I had endless potential — I just needed the "right time" to unlock it.
When work slowed down.
When my bank account was healthier.
When I had more energy — then I would chase my dreams.

Whenever someone asked why I hadn’t started my business, written my book, or traveled more, I had a long list of respectable excuses:

"I’m too busy."

"I’m waiting until things are more stable."

"It’s not the right season yet."


And everyone nodded understandingly because those excuses sounded reasonable.
After all, life can be hectic. Obligations are real. But deep down, I knew the real reason: fear.

Not fear of failure, surprisingly — fear of success.
Fear that if I actually tried, gave it my all, and still didn’t make it, I would have no more excuses left.
Nothing left to blame.

It’s safer, in a twisted way, to stay “potentially great” than to risk proving you’re actually average.
Potential is comfortable. Effort is terrifying.


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The Mirror Moment

One day, during a quiet Sunday afternoon, I sat with my journal and wrote one uncomfortable question:

> “If nobody was stopping you, what would you be doing right now?”



I stared at that sentence for a long time.
And then the truth came crashing down on me, heavier than any excuse I’d ever carried:

Nobody was stopping me.
Not my boss.
Not my family.
Not the economy.
Not the weather.
Just me.

I was the one choosing comfort over progress.
I was the one overthinking every move.
I was the one convincing myself that preparation was better than action.

Facing that realization was brutal. It stripped me bare of all my justifications.
But strangely, it was also freeing.
If I was the problem…
I could also be the solution.


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Small Steps, Big Shifts

After that day, I didn’t magically become a fearless action-taker overnight.
There were no fireworks, no cinematic transformation scene.

But I started small.

Instead of planning the “perfect” morning routine, I committed to waking up just 15 minutes earlier — no excuses, no negotiation with the snooze button.

Instead of endlessly dreaming about writing a novel, I forced myself to write just 100 words a day — even if they were terrible, even if they didn’t fit into any story.

Instead of waiting for the “right time” to invest in myself, I set aside $10 a week for online courses and personal development books.

Tiny moves.
Sometimes embarrassingly small.
But over time, they snowballed into massive change.

Momentum, I realized, doesn’t come from confidence.
It comes from movement.
Confidence follows action — not the other way around.


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Lessons I Learned

Here’s what breaking free from my own chains taught me:

1. Excuses Feel Good but Solve Nothing
Excuses protect your ego in the short term. But in the long run, they rob you of your potential. Action is the only antidote.


2. Fear Disguises Itself as Logic
“I’m not ready” sounds responsible, but it’s usually just fear wearing a fancy costume. Waiting for perfect conditions is just self-sabotage in disguise.


3. Starting Ugly Is Better Than Waiting Perfectly
You’ll never be 100% ready. Progress doesn’t reward perfection. It rewards momentum.


4. Accountability Changes Everything
Once I admitted I was fully responsible for my life, the excuses fell away. I stopped waiting. I started doing.




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Final Thoughts

Self-sabotage is sneaky.
It convinces you that waiting, overthinking, or doubting yourself is the "smart" thing to do.
It whispers that you need more time, more clarity, more certainty.

But here’s the hard truth:
There will never be a perfect time.

There’s only now.
The perfect moment isn’t coming — you are.

The dreams you keep tucked away aren’t waiting for the world to change.
They’re waiting for you to get out of your own way.

The only one holding you back is you.

And the second you realize that — not just with your mind, but with your actions — life opens up.

Not because the world suddenly becomes easier.

But because you become unstoppable.