The First Day

A bright purple figure shined so radiantly into my eyes whilst I was asleep. It was beautiful with wings, as I opened my eyes i could see it clearly it was hovering over what looked like waves. I woke up cold. It was so cold here. I was alone. There were so many people in this room some young, some old. I scanned the room and with each glance I felt their energy but I was also detached, I didn't feel like they were actually there. "Is this some sort of simulation?" They all looked at me emotionless and turned their heads to carry on with the conversations that were rudely interrupted.

I walked through this room observing and listening to each sentence, trying to find answers. Its like these people don't see me. I began to scream "Am I invisible?" They looked at me with annoyance. One guy came up to me, he was beautiful. He had this beautiful black hair locked into twists, golden skin that is clear enough to get a glimpse of his beautiful kind soul. He made it to me and just held my hand softly saying "No." I haven't felt seen since I woke up here. Suddenly that purple light began to shine but just on us. I have to admit this is weird, can he see it? Everything around us began to slow down. It wasn't real. Everyone literally disappeared. Even him. Its just me. I'm alone again. As much as I couldn't bare the thought of crying, I just let it flow in. I couldn't understand, I went through many dimensions and this happened in each.

How could I escape this? Its been days! I haven't seen my family. My son, my friends. It was hurting me. My mind was stuck on this guy that disappeared as the purple light beamed. He was gone, the only person that saw me out of all the previous dimensions I woke up in. How could I move forward?

Suddenly I am surrounded by mirrors. Beautiful I thought, Walking up to each mirror just admiring myself. I looked at my gorgeously braided jet black hair, then I observed my face I had oval shaped eyes, brown in color. My nose was broad but I loved that. I see me and I am beautiful. I felt my vessel and soul connect. I was present and it felt good. I began to feel whole, like myself again.

There he was, my son. "I love you mom" I was home. I hadn't felt home in such a long time. I have to stay present in the moment otherwise I will fall back to feeling alone. I was caught up in the world inside my head I lost the connection to physical. From this moment on I will cherish every moment, take nothing personal and not let one bad day define my entire life.

As I looked around I could feel that I had been missed. I was gone for awhile. My son's face lit up. "Mommy?" I picked him and gave him the biggest hug, I hadn't been as attentive as I should have been. I was so stuck in the world in my mind I lost grip of whats around me. I let it consume me. I called my power back from the things that drained me, and there I was. Back with him. I can think straight again. Its easy to get caught up in the mind and depending on how deep its a battle to get out. Once I was able to go against the depths of my mind I found myself, the person who knew I was able to make it out waiting for me to save her. My son needed me, I went through the darkest hours trying to find myself just so I could get back to him. How could I be there for him if I didn't start with me?

The first day I decided to put myself first was the day I felt a shift. A really good one. I had to pour into my cup before I could pour into others. Thats the first day my life changed.