The Expression of Art

The aspect of the feeling of anger with me is to scream in frustration but not able to express that anger. Creating that emotion is through art. When the world can no longer hear your voice, nor feel it. Nor take it seriously. Art can speaks so much if only one can listen.

When looking at art, it gives a vibe. Everyone gets different vibes from different drawings. Anyone can look at a drawing, painting and sketch and get different perspectives of a painting, sketch or drawing by looking, feeling or hearing the screams of a persons heart, or persons atmosphere by just seeing, listening or being in that moment. Being so in that moment where you can't ignore what that art is saying.

At some point things in general, should change but it will be a while before we get to that point. Nobody takes art seriously but it can change a persons atmosphere, depends on the intention of the artist that created. Creating images, or seeing others, my heart can be in touch with my emotions deeper than what it really is. It can feel the other persons emotions through that art.

Now, the first thing I do when I feel anger is create. It couldn't be anything. Doing the night I feel the urge to purge through those emotions to just allow myself to feel those emotions. If I am honest, it's not a releasing tool. It's to connect with my side of my darkness and to say ”Okay, I hear you.”

Along with that anger is not to make the world a better place. While I feel a little bit of anger talking about this.. I have to say. This is not to bring awareness to myself or anything. I just create. Anger can be my best friend but also can be my worst enemy.

The image that I have created represent all aspect of my anger. Along with being in touch with those drawings. Every time I speak, it is either being taken as a joke or cute or whatever. So, art is the only way I can express. It is something about that pencil and paper. It gets me everytime. It gets me to that place where I want to create anything behind closed doors. Along with being in the part of my own shadows. As you can see in the image, is three women of the character. A woman that has three sides of her. And secretly this attracted me a lot. It reminds me a lot when I am asleep at night, lights off, silently. The anger creeps up when it is time to purge. No, shame, no hiding. It comes out when least expected. Why? Cause it either is drawn to my energy or drawn to my aspects of how I want to be seen.

Not saying that is the way I want to live but at the same time.. When I step into the world that can careless if your living or not. I stepped into this energy of I don't care, I can careless what or how the world looks at me, I can can give two fucks about how my energy looks to the world. Not everyone deserves your greatness. So, I hid in my low-key anger to keep people that don't have best intention at heart. In peoples eyes, you may not be doing something with yourself because of the anger that you shown, and the energy that you give into it. And some people don't want to be around that cause of whatever. It's like people want to see the good in you but not the highs and the lows.

Then I remembered that my own anger can be my own worst enemy, where my own anger can be hurt me more than it can hurt the other person. And this is where art and anger are more powerful together. When creating, I allow my anger to purge through my mind, through my body, through the pencil spiritually, through my paper spiritually. Allowing the sensation of anger to go through the painting, drawings, or sketch.

In psychological research, it states that anger can bring more sadness and more physical pain to the body. Now, I sometimes wonder, How can that be? Is it the memories? Is it the energy of what that memory did? It something that goes unsaid. This is something that I never did, drawing what I remember. Drawing what I can see, good or bad. Or not being able to be in touch with that mindset but to remember it. Drawing what I think of it. It's like touching your mind with a quick sketch.