Surviving &Thriving Harshness
"The Problem It's Me Not You"
Be honest this title is really a moment of questions for me as I deal with people in my life. Some judgement may come to me from this story as there have been already with my experience dealing with harshness and mistreatment in my relationships. I have been talked to by those I love in a harsh way and when I attempt to let them know of my concerns of their tone and treatment, I was told I was being sensitive, bitter and even negative. To give you brief summary of the treatment from the loved ones in my next paragraphs. I really understand that the whole purpose for myself and many not owning up to our responsibility to being harsh is not the source of good but evil.
Comments about my eating like a pig was shared in a aggressive way as we set at a women fellowship at a local church. A remark was given that I need to buy more expensive shoes because I am just wearing my shoes to the side because its comfortable after a church event. The style of clothing for me has been looked at as not meeting the preferences of those of high class at church and business events. Being labeled to joyful and animated when conducting church events or handling life challenges with head shakes and criticism. Called stupid and gullible for was helping people I care about by a man that I chosen. I have been told I have I have body odor in the past by family and employers. After family members gave towards giving food to the community a ministry leader told the church authority that the ministry disapproved and it was personal driven which stop future giving. In the Church documents was stated that sharing the gospel methods was harsh and was given restrictions not to do one of one. Correction in public was done multiple times instead coming to me one on one. My testimonies in church were critiqued and monitored to point I really do not want to give them anymore.
This just name a few of the things I have been through and I have confronted theses individuals with a purpose of a better relationship. Their responses have been that our relationship gave them the authority to use their treatment as a tool of my improvement and need for change. Also, they told me I need to get tuff skin and stop being so sensitive and negative. They would laugh at the way they treated me and say I needed to get over it and mock me with saying I always talk about church hurt or need to change because they are just giving me what I deserve.
These experiences have been multiple from family, community and church members where all responses have been justified as being ok only to make me a stronger person to help others. Also, I would ask God if I was the problem and not them where do I need to change. I began to do research on relationships and communication in biblical based resources that helped me with self exploring. I learned that there are healthy methods for dealing with mistreatment. Finally, realizing that the quick short response for being handled harshly is by being in prayer for good things for them, speaking positive words about them, doing good deeds, sharing my concerns with love, and get some help with accountability for self and others after discussion about the treatment. Now I am Free to love, let go, learn, and live regardless of harshness I thrive.
About the Creator
Avizz V Wright
I'm totally a DC Washingtonian who is a Motivator for Life, Purpose, Goals and Good Works this is done by speaking life, truth, and love to all those I encounter everyday. My desire is help people experience the freedom to be you and used.
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