Is Your Struggle Your Destiny?

We’ve all heard the expression, “Life is a struggle.”

I used to believe that statement. I used to add meaning to it. I didn’t realize it was just an opinion. The opinion of the person who said it.

Over the years people came into my life who also wholeheartedly believed that statement.

I’ve come to realize over the years that adding meaning to things is a soothing and coping mechanism.

Sure, putting a positive spin on a difficult situation seems like the best thing to do.

But is it?

Even the most loving and compassionate people seem to socially perpetuate this behavior because some of the most common soothing statements are the first things that come to mind. But just like any distraction from feeling anything in the here and now, these responses are tools to distract the mind.

Personally, I didn’t believe it per se.

But I did have beliefs that aligned with it.

“Challenges make you grow.”

“What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.”

If someone believes these statements to be true, there are hidden beliefs that the person will have to believe, too.

And it is often the hidden beliefs that are the most destructive because they support the main belief. Without the hidden belief, the main belief cannot be true.

Let’s take a look at those statements again.

“Challenges make you grow.”

The supporting belief for this implies that a person will remain immature or stagnant in life for as long as they don’t have challenges. If the main belief cannot be true, then challenges can fade away.

“What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.”

This statement implies that you have to go through near-death experiences in order to be the strongest human being you could possibly be or to have the strongest character you could possibly have.

So what happens? People who believe this over time might notice when they look back on the past, they faced near-death experiences.

If that is true, there’s good news.

It means you are a very powerful manifestor of things you focus on so you also have the power to change what you attract into your life. Awareness of truths about yourself is key to changing what you attract. You cannot change what you know to be true about yourself without changing what you believe in your current reality.

For example, if you can recognize your strength can come from positive experiences and that the positive interpretation of negative experiences was basically a survival mechanism, you can begin to take responsibility by making choices that align with your values and passions. You can begin to recognize that taking one step or one action towards your passion each day is one of the strongest things you can do. You might see that asking for what you want or saying no in order to get your own needs met also builds personal power and inner strength. There are numerous ways to empower yourself and develop your own personal strength without having to go through the gauntlet.

Strength is empowerment. Self-trust amplifies inner strength.

Make a list of all the ways you assert inner strength or self-trust each day. Make a list of things you’ve done in the past. Focus on those things and think of ways to challenge yourself further towards the life you’ve always dreamed of.

I thought writing about the health struggles since birth was what I was supposed to do. I thought my food allergy advocacy and helping those who went through what I did was my calling. It's not.

I am so much more than the struggles I’ve overcome. The things I want to do are far beyond any kind of category or perfect little box. And for anyone who has ever had a chronic illness or disease, I know this is the case for you, too. You don’t have to be gifted or talented to make a huge difference in the lives of other people. I know I’m not the best singer, but music has always been the thing that brings me the greatest joy. Writing lyrics, producing music and making the videos for them is when I feel like I’m in heaven on earth. And I know others seeing my joy will inspire them to live their greatest joy as well.

Our life purpose is to be happy and to find happiness in the things we do. The thing that makes you most happy will be unique to you. Maybe its just being present for a stranger who needs a listening ear. Maybe its the gift of a smile that uplifts someone’s heart.

Whatever it is, find it today and give it your all. That way, you will look at you and know how strong you really are. Then those who know your story will, too.