I Did These 5 Things and the Results Were Mind Blowing

We have all suffered over the past couple of years, some more than others. The loss of loved ones, financial instability, loneliness, and mental health issues, to mention just a few.

Changing my perspective on life

On New Year’s day, having faced my mortality head-on following emergency surgery, instead of making resolutions for the coming year, I decided to make some drastic changes to my lifestyle.

Negativity breeds negativity

Negativity is something that blights me from time to time but now I focus on turning it around into something positive. Do you go through phases in your life when nothing seems to be going right? I had one such phase at the end of last year and I could feel myself being drawn down into a black hole.

I have only suffered from depression once in my life and that was some years ago when I was trapped in a toxic and abusive relationship. I contemplated the worst-case scenario to escape. Thankfully, I used a combination of professional medical help, counseling, and resilience to break through and get my life back on track.

My doctor told me to find the root of the problem. I knew exactly what the ‘problem’ was that was causing me so much heartache, but I had no means of dealing with it. I wrote in-depth about my experience in this article here.

Learning to become more positive

I had a lot of time to think after my surgery. Writing was my savior because laid up in bed at least I could pass the time by keeping my mind active even if my body had to remain fairly inactive for a short time to heal.

I wasn’t able to get out and play tennis or golf and I missed that. I also missed the social element of those hobbies. Working alone from home, I spend a lot of time on my own, but when you are physically challenged, it changes everything about life as you once knew it.

Negativity can be harmful

During one of my first short walks outdoors, I bumped into a neighbor who I hadn’t seen in a long time. Immediately, he began talking about a dispute he was embroiled in with his next-door neighbor, and the more he talked about it, the hotter under the collar he got until eventually, I thought he was going to have a coronary right there in front of me.

I interjected with some thoughts on how I thought he could deal with the situation and tried to steer him away from the subject, but he was having none of it. Eventually, I said that I had to get back because I was feeling tired and I ended the conversation. This guy was so focused on his problems that he didn’t ask me how I was doing or even cared. Which got me thinking.

The more negative energy that my neighbor was putting into the dispute, the more it consumed him. It probably fills his every waking moment which will eventually impact his health. I should know. I have been there myself when my ex-partner fought me through the courts. It is debilitating.

Starting a new hobby

As I wasn’t able to play golf or tennis, I had to think outside the box. I didn’t want to vegetate because I couldn’t enjoy energetic outdoor sports, so I took up (gentle) yoga. It not only relaxed me, but I could feel the tension oozing out of me. I do a daily session of Yoga with Adriene and find her extremely calming. She explains all the terms and positions in an informative and easy-to-understand way. It’s fun to do and I get so much out of it. I also feel more relaxed and focused after the sessions.

You don’t have to tie yourself in knots or bend over backward to feel the benefits of yoga. Adriene has some gentle stretching exercises and you will also feel the spiritual connection. My brain and body function has improved significantly since enjoying these daily sessions.

Focusing more on nature

See the girl in the picture leaning out of an open window taking in the mountain air? I do that. I open the window and breathe in a great lungful of fresh air. I take time to look at nature around me; I take time to really listen to the birds. As a keen bird-watcher, I try and identify them.

One morning at dawn (which was 07:30 at this time of the year in the UK), I saw the most amazing red sky, like an artist had painted it and I could see all the brush strokes. I stood admiring it, drinking in the awe of witnessing something so incredibly beautiful. Normally, I would be racing around opening up the house for the start of another day.

I am fortunate to live in an area of outstanding natural beauty but if you don’t, each time you look out of your window, try to see something different. If you live in a city there is bound to be at least one park or green space. Most big cities have several parks where you can escape the metropolis and focus on nature. Trees, flowers, birds. Each one of them fascinating when we take the time to look at them in detail and drink in their beauty.

Trying to see the good in people

Instead of focusing on a person’s negative features, I flip things around and concentrate on a person’s positive characteristics. Taking a different perspective has transformed the way I view people and interact with them.

The neighbor guy was obviously all het up the day that I saw him and I tried to put myself in his shoes and wondered how I would have reacted in similar circumstances. He’s usually a jolly, fun type of guy so the dispute had affected his outlook and in turn, his behavior. He was pouring all his energy into a negative situation and not focusing on the positives.

We live in a high-pressure world with deadlines, responsibilities, and financial concerns. What if we take a step back from time to time? Re-assess the way we look at situations? Try not to stress about the small stuff. Put yourself and your well-being first over and above the negative behavior of others. You will feel stronger and calmer for not being drawn into their negative zone.

Accepting my life for what it is

What do I mean by that? How many times have you heard somebody say, “So-and-so sold his company for $1.2 billion recently,” or “Mr. Smith up the road has just come back from his third holiday this year in the Caribbean and he only has a regular job? How does he do it?”

Hands up. I used to get envious when I heard stories like that, but not anymore. If you look deeper into these comments or explore the background to how these people achieve these amazing things, it usually equates to a grueling schedule of work or a never-ending round of meetings and high-level take-over bids. Way out of my league and something that I wouldn’t be capable of doing because I don’t move in that type of world.

I work remotely from home and have found my level in life. I am happy with where I am and how I got here. I am grateful for the things that I have in my life and more importantly, for the people in it. My family, friends, and loved ones are the mainstay of my life, not possessions.

To re-cap

These are the 5 things that I did, which have changed my life for the better:-

Focusing on positivity

Seeing things, admiring them, and finding beauty in them

Practicing daily yoga

Finding the good qualities of a person’s character

Learning to be more accepting of my life

These things can change your life too and the effects have been astonishing. I feel calmer, more relaxed, and a lot more at ease. Give it a go — you’ve got nothing to lose!

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This article was first published on Medium where you can also listen to it. You can also see what I have been up to recently by catching up with me at Rosy's Ramblings. Life in an English village and so much more!