how to leave your comfort zone

in the previous article I talked about comfort zone,now I am going to tell you how to leave it

number one start small instead of making this big massive leap

start with little steps that feel good to your nervous system because remember it's not about escaping Comfort it's about enlarging what feels comfortable to include new experiences, so if you're nervous about public speaking start by just speaking in front of a mirror and then speaking to a small group and then gradually increase the size and number

two: pair new experiences with something familiar and enjoyable

this blurs the line between familiar and unfamiliar and helps the brain associate new things with positive outcomes rather than stress, so for example if you're trying something new like a pilates class and you're kind of intimidated maybe you're feeling a little apprehensive about it, pair it with something you love, something you're already familiar with something like grabbing your favorite coffee from your cute little coffee shop afterwards and this mentally makes the whole experience feel more rewarding rather than intimidating.

and number three recognize and work with your mind's need for safety

when you actually truly understand that all your brain is trying to do is to keep you safe, you can spot its resistance and instead of seeing your fear as this big old stop sign you can start recognizing it as simply just a signal that you are stepping into new territory. when you rewire your mind to embrace the unfamiliar you start to realize that your perceived limits aren't actually real what once felt totally Out Of Reach now becomes possible not because anything out there changed the world didn't change but because you changed your nervous system and your comfort zone expanded to handle more.

but what if anxiety or fear does come up? let me tell you how to work with it and actually make it work in your favor so here's the thing our body's responses to fear and excitement are almost identical like a faster heartbeat or heightened alertness or even a bit of an adrenaline rush the biggest difference is our interpretation of those feelings fear and excitement both trigger a release of adrenaline and cortisol stress hormones however the context and our mindset determine whether we experience these reactions as positive AKA exciting or negative AKA scary so when you choose to greet these cues and those feelings with excitement rather than fear and you tell yourself that you're excited you actually start to change your entire experience, and your body will send different signals to yourself based on how you talk to yourself. so for example if you say I'm anxious you are claiming the identity and experience of anxiety and you are subconsciously creating more of it, all your brain hears is anxiety and so that's what it focuses on, but instead if you say something like I want to feel more calm you're sending request signals to your body for calm and so when you feel some of those initial signs of nervousness instead of saying I'm scared of what's going to happen you can say to yourself This is excitement I'm excited about this opportunity this simple shift and rephrasing can change your brain's interpretation of an experience.

another powerful way though to reframe this fear is through visualization AKA mentally rehearsing success before it happens now keep in mind that your brain cannot distinguish between a real or a vividly imagined experience and Joe despenza talks about this all the time it does not know the difference so when you vividly imagine yourself achieving or succeeding in this new situation or this new environment or you visualize yourself having fun trying something new trying something different you condition your mind to actually anticipate positive outcomes.

for example if you're preparing for a nerve-wracking event like speaking at a big event on a big stage spend ample time beforehand visualizing yourself speaking confidently and enjoying the experience feel the warmth of the lights on your face hear the laughter and the positive reactions from the audience feel the microphone in your hands feel how good it feels to stand up there confidently and command all this attention and when you do this you literally start training your nervous system to associate that environment that you imagined or that situation that you visualized with confidence, and ease because again your brain doesn't know the difference so by rehearsing it in a safe space first AKA your mind where nothing can really go wrong when the actual moment does arrive your brain is going to recognize it and be like oh we've done this before this is familiar which can make you feel a lot more comfortable

and lastly celebrate your wins and reinforce your progress and this isn't just like to feel good although that's nice but this is actually like a good psychological trick. every time you acknowledge your progress your brain releases dopamine which tells your mind oh trying new things is actually exciting, trying new things is actually a good thing. the more you celebrate your wins the more you train your brain to see expansion as a happy positive thing instead of a stressful heart thing so make sure you take a moment to realize how far you've come and celebrate the little wins and you know what sometimes maybe even treat yourself a little bit so this little shift in perspective from nervousness to excitement it can go a long way

but it's important to remember though that you are not the only Factor when it comes to expanding your comfort zone humans are essentially like plants and as we all know plants can only grow in the right conditions but us too we can only grow in the right Company, the company you keep can make or break your growth Journey because just like plants we need the right environment to grow and to thrive and what I mean is that some people will help to expand your comfort zone and some people will do the opposite be mindful of that if you feel that your dreams and your desires and what you want to grow into might not be understood and supported by your circle of people then it might be a better idea to keep those plans closer to the chest you might have to be selective about what you're sharing personally

but there's one key piece left because expanding your comfort zone is not just like a onetime thing it's an ongoing evolving process you don't just expand your comfort zone once and call it a day if you're not intentional your brain will always default back to what's familiar because that's what it's wired to do and sometimes that's fine we don't always need to be growing and evolving and pushing the limits of our comfort zone every single day but in the long term that's going to hurt you in the long term that's going to limit you if you're not actively refreshing your goals and stretching into new experiences and questioning why you're doing certain things you will slowly start moving back into patterns that limit you without even realizing it and if you don't check in with yourself regularly your comfort zone will start to shrink again

so every month or so check in with yourself treat it like a little romantic moment I do this in my notion in my little month-end wrap up that I do but ask yourself what are my current goals and desires how am I expanding myself to meet them what limiting stories am I telling myself that's keeping my comfort zone small and keeping me in fear and is there anything that I keep doing that is familiar but isn't actually helping me anymore remember you shape your comfort zone and you have the power to redesign it at any time you get to renovate and upgrade that house that you built whenever you want to or whenever you feel like you need it.

so the main point that I want you to understand and what I want you to take away is that you don't need to force yourself into discomfort and suffering all the time in order to grow, you can rewire your brain and train yourself to see newness differently and you can start seeing it as natural and safe and maybe even exciting .when you stop assuming that the unknown is a threat getting out of your comfort zone stops feeling like a battle and it starts feeling like a beautiful Pleasant happy expansion of yourself and that is how you comfortably get out of your comfort zone

so now that you're equipped with the tools to get out of your comfort zone but in a way that feels good it's time to walk and start taking action and creating the life you want.