Guardian of Resilience

I am a brave woman living in a vibrant city known for its music and arts. I have a passion for making a positive impact on the world through my writing and through giving public speeches. I don't know what the Universe is doing in a full way, but I get that right now it works for me not against me. I understand that I am being built to do a mighty work in honor of the God I choose to serve. I believe in free will so it is only for me to share my stories in a way that does not offend others or go against the rules of Vocal. I try to write in a way that will take my religious belief out of the way, while still helping others. I believe that if one wants to know more, they will simply come to me in a message and ask, and that is where I get an opportunity to give my testimony. Otherwise, I give my testimony through my public encounters.

My Background:

I am a Hispanic female. I grew up knowing half Spanish, and half sign language because I went back and forth between my mother and grandmother. My strengths, include my caring nature, capacity for unconditional love, and my ability to teach/share my own life experiences. I use my writing to emphasize my spiritual beliefs, values, and unwavering integrity. I believe that it isn't enough just to write, but it is the nature of my writing that will touch the lives of many. It is the nature of how I choose free will to allow someone to read my stories and it tugs at their heart to want to do the same thing. When I write or speak, I help someone in choosing the outcome, whether it is to talk to someone, get help, or find ways of coping that will help them reach their full potential in life.

The Conflict:

My weakness is close relationships due to a deep-seated fear of betrayal and abandonment. If you dive into my struggles with trust, particularly in romantic relationships then you would see that my life is never perfect. The impact of past experiences that has shaped my guarded mindset. It has affected me immensely. I always believe in my mind that someone is out to get me, scheme against me, or take my family down. Than I start believing it is the people around me who are doing the scheming and it puts them in a position of being hurt and not believing in what I am doing. It actually puts me in the position of looking criminal or crazy.

Internal Battles:

The internal conflict I face are with occasional attacks of doubt and evil thoughts that prey on my vulnerability. I have a struggle between these negative influences such as addiction, lust, and anger. It battles with the inner strength that guards me against succumbing to toxicity. Some lessons I have repeated time and again, and they have not been comfortable. In fact, I am hoping that I get to a place of family and true friendship. Spending time with my grand babies because I finally overcame those struggles.

Turning Point:

The turning point in my life seemed tragic. I relapsed and I was in a toxic environment with a toxic partner. I went through a set of events that seemed like I was failing. It felt like I was never gonna get through the season. My Faith was looking invisible to others, and I was like JOB in the Bible, I just kept losing. Until I had nothing left to show except my Faith, my integrity and the nature of how my conscience mind works. Only then was I able to see the beauty with every struggle. These events were inspiring encounters that challenged my beliefs and made me change perspective on how I look at life.

My Transformation:

When I look back on every encounter with life, I have to see trauma. Either trauma caused from childhood, or trauma that I caused myself due to my behavior. I had to realize that I am my own worst enemy. I had to look from a place of compassion, not just for myself, but for others. I see the evil verses the good and try to live in a place of having a good mindset. This way, I can overcome the bad with good thoughts. I started doing more meditation and prayer. I stayed reading in my Bible. I repeated daily affirmations, and I was accompanied by a love unseen. I received public encouragement. I had the help of man's best friend, my dog, who seems to know when I am not feeling well. All these things gradually got my spirit up again.

Most important, I had to let go of people and places that no longer serve me purpose or make me happy. I realized that I am an important piece of the puzzle that makes this world go round. I realize that not only do I need to be happy, but I am the reason others are learning to be happy also. Communication is something I learned in the past with my ex-husband. Here today, I have learned it isn't just communicating, but it is the effective way of being done by asking three questions. I ask myself: Is it true? Is it kind? or Is it Necessary?

I also had to practice Gratitude. While I still am in a learning process of things, I have to stop and cherish what is good. I embrace the people who challenge me rather than continue to tear things down. If I mess up and yell, than they are unconditional about the love they give me. This also makes me grateful. Gratitude helps me recognize that their is a community of believers in who I am and how I face the day to day. Gratitude helps me appreciate the little changes that I see people make. It makes me proud, and it it makes me smile again.

I write as Therapy:

As I take myself to happier days, I like to showcase my writing process as a form of therapeutic expression. I channel my own challenges into encouraging and inspiring stories on platforms like Vocal, aiming to connect with others facing similar battles. I realize that we are many who have different beliefs and so I use my creative writing to help others in a way that can be beneficial, not harmful, or aggressive. I never want the judgment to be harsh, nor will I judge others based on their own spiritual beliefs.

I believe in the power of Love and Love in my Bible, does not hurt, and it does not boast or brag to others. I allow my therapeutic writing and speaking to gain the trust and belief that life has more to offer than just being depressed or stuck in my past.

Conclusion:

I am a guardian of resilience. I am the one sent in this world to overcome, chosen since birth. While I was formed in my mother's womb, my story was already being written in the stars. I broke generational curses and trauma. That means I not only broke them for myself, but for many families who were a part of it. I believe that in the Power of Love and Respect, that we all meet our purpose when we gain the true understanding of what it means to be WHOLE, and complete. Repairing a deep wound throughout the soul!

I write not just for myself, but for others. I write that anyone struggling with the things I went through will know a different path awaits. Life is a struggle for all of us. Death is always a grieving part we never want to go through. Karma is an action of past so the moment we choose to heal, we choose to rid our life of traumatic event, curses, and hexes. We choose to go into a future with a better understanding of who we are and I choose to fulfill my reason for being here. I am still working on a few quirks here and there, but we all fall short of perfect. We still, however, can continue to learn from others and teach in the process of the journey to perfect. That is where I plan to keep taking my writing and public speaking. Perhaps maybe even write a hit script or song. Look out future, here I come accepting those awards!

***Thank you for your support. I use Vondy AI to create the images seen on this short story. However this is all my own voice, my own story genuinely written from the heart and with honesty.***