Every Difficulty Has An Opportunity
- David Stidston
Life can bring us so many happy moments and wonderful memories, but on the flip side, many times we also find ourselves facing extreme hardship, sorrow, hurt, pain, difficulty, and adversity. We can be dragged to the absolute lowest depths of despair, facing circumstances and situations which are emotionally destructive and utterly soul destroying. They often take us to the point we feel the whole world is falling apart around us, and we fail to see any light at the end of what seems like a very long and dark tunnel. Whether it's suffering the tragic loss of a loved one, battling a personal debilitating health issue, facing the prospect of bankruptcy, being laid off from our job, dealing with a relationship/marital split, overcoming the complete loss of our house and possessions due to a fire, or whatever it may be, it's these sort of events that leave us feeling devastated and crushed. It leaves us in complete anxiety and fear about what the immediate future holds for us, and how we are going to handle and overcome these circumstances and emotions. Like I suffered through, many individuals also battle with depression and mental health issues, such is the extremity of the adversity in their life. It's quite upsetting that so many people take their own lives, just to escape the hurt, pain, sorrow, unhappiness, and misery, they are forced to deal with. There's no sugar coating over these times, they are horrible to deal with.
As much as we may believe, nor ever see, certain other people confront these type of adversities, the truth is, no one is exempt. Everyone faces times of adversity, pain, hardship, and sorrow, not always in the way we perhaps do, but guaranteed they do, in some form or another. Those who we never see face adversity, quite often suffer in silence, dealing with their issues behind the scenes, whilst putting on a brave face and keeping up appearances. We all suffer at times, it's just an unfortunate aspect of life, so in that knowledge, there's nothing else to do but work out how we deal with it, and how we can go about overcoming it. As strange as it may both seem and sound, with adversity, comes opportunity. In order for us to learn, grow, develop, and mature, life loves to heap challenges on us, so to test our character. It provides us with the opportunity to demonstrate our true resilience, our level of patience, our ability to problem solve, our ability to control our temperament, our behavior in handling a crisis, and basically the manner in which we deal with the situation. Not only does our character get tested though, life also dangles a carrot of opportunity in front of us, one in which we can perhaps discover our purpose, or one in which leads us to greater things, or even just an opportunity to escape from somewhere that's truly not in our best interest. Be that we choose to believe in God or not, one thing is for certain, we each have a purpose in life. We each have our life mapped out for us, a perfect plan that guides us to happiness, success, and a platform in which we can help others. The problem is, most of us either fail to see, or we simply deny, the opportunity to create this life for ourselves.
Difficulty and adversity are often the most prominent times in which these opportunities are present, and waiting to be seized. For the majority of us, we simply curse, swear, play the victim, wallow in misery, seek out sympathy and compassion, complain, whinge, crawl into our shell, feel sorry for ourselves, accept defeat, and focus solely on the negatives. What more of us need to do is ask ourselves, what is this difficulty and adversity trying to teach me? Where is this difficulty and adversity trying to lead me? Likely, it may involve decisions, tasks, and actions, that involve great discomfort, and we don't want to have to do them, however our opportunity and reward may be behind them. Often, we know what we need to do, but we are fearful of doing it, yet if we avoid it, our circumstances only worsen, and our adversity intensifies. Take a moment to think about a difficult period in your life, a time where you were at your lowest, or when something happened that crushed you emotionally. Having endured that pain, suffering, and sorrow, to now being on the other side of that adversity, do you feel mentally stronger? Despite what you experienced, do you feel like you have learnt and matured from it, as a result? Most people admit to feeling mentally and emotionally stronger, after having successfully overcome such difficult times, such is what adversity can do for us. We learn, we grow, we strengthen, and we mature. We can't see the benefits to us at the time, but adversity structures our character. It's not the adversity itself that does this though, it's our response to it. Again, if we just focus on what we are being taught, or where we are being led, and keep positive minded that this time of difficulty is actually a time of opportunity, we can truly amaze ourselves in what good we can achieve from something so bad. It's not to say we shouldn't grieve or show natural human emotion, but we should always seek out how we can turn our tragedies into triumphs. Every difficulty has an opportunity, so focus on the positives that you can create out of the situation, not the negatives of the situation itself.
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About the Creator
David Stidston
My name is David Stidston, and I am a single father to my 8-year-old daughter Mia. We live in the beautiful city of Hobart in Tasmania, Australia. I am currently self-employed, working as a freelancer and casually in market research.
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In many of my blog entries, over these past couple of years, I have often stressed about how we should never become someone who chases after money. It's such a sad fact that so many people worldwide are possessed by money, to the point where they become so desperate, that they begin to base the majority of their decisions and actions around trying to acquire more and more cash. As a result, the more important aspects of life, such as our family, our relationships, our health, our happiness, and our goals, are often sacrificed in the process. Many of us are influenced to believe that money buys happiness, and whilst there's no denying that it does enhance our life in different ways, it's definitely not the key component to living a life blessed with happiness, satisfaction, success, and fulfillment. Such becomes the craving and desperation for money, that many of us reach the point we commit some foolish actions, we break the law, we cause harm to others, and we lose all sense of satisfaction and gratitude. Basically, that craving and desperation for money turns into an obsession, and it never ends. Even when we do acquire some cash, it's never enough, we still want lots more of it. Now there's nothing wrong with trying to create wealth, nor is it abnormal or foolish to want to build on that wealth, because it's important for our future, and our family's future, after all. The problem lies within our greed and selfishness. Most of us don't intend to use money for the greater good, in helping others, and investing in our future, but instead, we just want to splurge on luxuries for ourselves. You only need to look at the vast majority of lower to middle class income earners of the world, to see how each time they come across some extra money above their normal income, and how quickly they are off spending it in a heartbeat. On a low income wage, they try to live the lifestyle of a wealthy person, splurging any available funds in their bank account on new phones, new plasma televisions, and designer brand clothing. They are never satisfied with what they already have, and they completely lack self-control in spending.
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It's difficult to know how to start this. I've suggested that it's been a tough one from my title and in many ways, it has; however, there is an argument that it's not been that extraordinary at all, merely this wonderful thing we call "life" with all its climaxes and pitfalls.
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For the longest time, I believed my life was simply paused. Not broken. Not finished. Just waiting. Waiting for the right moment. Waiting for the right person. Waiting for something—anything—to arrive and change everything. I didn’t know exactly what I was waiting for, but I was sure it would come. People always said things like “It’ll get better” or “Your time will come”, and I clung to those words like promises written in invisible ink. I believed that if I endured long enough, life would eventually reward my patience. So I waited. I waited quietly, because I didn’t want to be a burden. I waited politely, because I didn’t want to seem ungrateful. I waited silently, because I didn’t even know how to explain what was wrong. From the outside, my life looked acceptable. I functioned. I showed up. I smiled when it was expected of me. I laughed at jokes that didn’t reach my heart. I answered “I’m fine” so often that it started to feel like muscle memory. But inside, something was eroding. Every day felt heavier than the last, like I was carrying a weight that kept growing while no one was looking. I woke up tired, went to bed tired, and spent the hours in between pretending I wasn’t. There was a quiet exhaustion that sleep couldn’t touch—a tiredness that came from constantly hoping for relief that never arrived. I thought suffering had to be loud to be real. I thought pain needed witnesses to matter. Mine had neither. There was no dramatic breaking point, no single moment when everything fell apart. Instead, it unraveled slowly. Almost gently. Like a thread pulled so gradually you don’t notice the fabric weakening until it’s too late. I kept telling myself, Just hold on a little longer. Surely someone would notice. Surely someone would step in. Surely life wouldn’t let me keep feeling this way forever. But life did. And then one day—an ordinary day that didn’t announce its importance—I realized something that changed everything. Nobody was coming. That realization didn’t arrive with clarity or relief. It arrived like grief. Heavy. Sharp. Unforgiving. I remember sitting alone, staring at nothing in particular, and feeling the truth settle into my bones. There would be no rescue. No sudden turning point delivered by someone else’s effort. No moment where everything magically aligned and lifted me out of my own life. It wasn’t that people didn’t care. It was that everyone was busy surviving their own storms. I had been waiting for someone to save me from a life that only I was living. And for a while, that realization shattered me. I felt abandoned by the world, betrayed by hope itself. I questioned every prayer I had whispered into the dark, every moment I had chosen patience over action. I wondered if I had misunderstood life completely—if the promises I believed in were never meant for people like me. I mourned the version of myself who thought endurance alone was enough. There is a special kind of loneliness that comes from realizing your pain is invisible. That no matter how heavy it feels to you, the world keeps moving at the same pace. Bills still need to be paid. Responsibilities still demand attention. Smiles are still expected. So I kept going. But something inside me had cracked open. Once you see the truth, you can’t unsee it. And the truth was this: waiting had become my hiding place. Hope, without action, had become an excuse to stay small. I had been standing still, convincing myself that stillness was strength. It wasn’t. Saving myself didn’t begin with confidence. It began with fear. Fear of staying the same. Fear of waking up ten years later in the same emotional place. Fear of realizing that I had wasted my own life waiting for permission to live it. I didn’t suddenly become brave. I became tired of being helpless. The first steps were almost embarrassing in their simplicity. There was nothing poetic about them. No montage-worthy transformation. Just small decisions that felt enormous at the time. Getting out of bed even when my body begged me not to. Choosing one task, then another, then another. Letting myself admit—quietly—that I was not okay. Some days, saving myself meant setting boundaries that made other people uncomfortable. I learned how often my exhaustion came from overextending myself to earn love, approval, or relevance. Saying no felt selfish at first. It felt wrong. But it also felt like oxygen. Other days, saving myself meant sitting alone with my feelings instead of numbing them. No distractions. No pretending. Just honesty. That was harder than any physical effort I had ever made. Facing your own thoughts can feel like standing in front of a mirror that refuses to lie. I began to understand something no one had taught me: healing is not linear, and it is rarely beautiful. It’s messy. Inconsistent. Frustrating. Some days feel like progress, others feel like failure. But both are part of the same road. There were days I missed the comfort of waiting. Waiting meant responsibility belonged to someone else. Taking control meant accepting that my life—every imperfect part of it—was in my hands. That was terrifying. But it was also freeing. As I slowly rebuilt myself, I noticed something else. Not everyone wanted to walk with me into this new version of myself. Some people preferred the me who needed saving. The me who was easier to control, easier to dismiss, easier to define. Outgrowing people hurts. Outgrowing places hurts. Outgrowing old versions of yourself hurts most of all. But staying the same hurts longer. I lost connections I thought were permanent. I stepped away from spaces that no longer fit who I was becoming. Loneliness returned—but this time, it was different. This loneliness felt honest. It didn’t come from abandonment; it came from alignment. I learned that being alone while growing is far healthier than being surrounded while shrinking. Strength, I discovered, isn’t loud. It doesn’t announce itself. It doesn’t demand recognition. Strength shows up quietly, day after day, in the choices you make when no one is watching. It shows up when you keep going even though the results are slow. When you forgive yourself for falling back into old habits. When you choose patience with yourself instead of punishment. There were setbacks—many of them. I stumbled. I doubted myself. I wondered if I was doing everything wrong. But this time, I didn’t collapse and wait for someone else to fix the damage. I picked myself up. Again and again. And something unexpected happened as I kept choosing myself: the world didn’t suddenly become easier, but I became stronger. Problems that once felt unbearable became manageable. Pain that once consumed me became something I could sit with without losing myself. I stopped asking, Why is this happening to me? I started asking, What can I do with what’s happening? That question changed everything. Today, my life is not perfect. I still have days when old fears resurface. I still feel tired sometimes. I still wish things were easier. But I no longer wait for rescue. I trust myself now. I trust that even if things fall apart, I will be there to put them back together. I trust that my worth doesn’t depend on who shows up for me. I trust that I am capable of building a life that feels like my own. And maybe the most important thing I’ve learned is this: realizing nobody is coming to save you is not a sentence. It’s an invitation. An invitation to stop shrinking. An invitation to take responsibility for your healing. An invitation to become the person you’ve been waiting for. If you’re reading this and you feel stuck—if you feel invisible, exhausted, or quietly breaking—I want you to know this: you are not weak for waiting. You were doing the best you could with what you knew. But you don’t have to wait anymore. Sometimes, saving yourself doesn’t mean changing everything. It means choosing yourself once—then choosing yourself again tomorrow. And one day, you’ll look back and realize that the moment nobody came was the moment your life truly began.Start writing...
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