Double-Sided Curse of Healing

The double-sided curse of healing, the double-sided curse of healing from past pain, past trauma, from past events that you thought will simply go away if you just squeeze your eyes real tight. The double-sided curse of healing when you thought the horrid events, and decision-making you made as a child will simply fade because you are no longer nine-years-old but now is twenty-nine years old. Oops, they forgot to mention, that your current adult decisions, life events, entanglements, side-flings, and sneaky-links will reopen these wounds, and got you asking yourself “Do a bish need therapy, I thought I was over this?!” Black people don’t need therapy, I must keep this reopen wound locked on the inside so I must stay socially acceptable because this is what the mass media is programming us, and telling us that is how I can finally get my white picket fence, a quarter-acre, and a mule.

The double-sided curse of healing. The double-side curse of healing is where on one side, you finally take control of your own mindset, your own trauma, and healing. Then begin to address the biggest dirt pile in your life that you have been hitting the blue skidoo for over ten years. There is a side where you finally decided enough is enough and I am about to aggressively conquer everything about my fear, traumas hurt, and mistakes and make everyone accountable for their predatory ways and actions towards an innocent black child. Speak about the vile things that were has done to me and bring clarity on why I think the way I do now as an adult. On the contrary on the other side is where you are shackled by doubt, fear, guilt, shame, black-lash, and name-calling because the things you have direct experience sound absurd, and it must be a lie. The double-sided curse of healing.

Sounds easy, sounds bold, sounds like you are in control right? Wrong! The double-side curse is like dancing the tango with a lifelong dance partner you assigned without proper consent. As a newborn baby, you didn’t know wasn’t expecting to be dropped, neglected, abused, tormented, and degraded. However, with this double-sided curse of healing, you can pick it aside. You can pick a route to approach the way to your healing. I know for me I am picking the side of rebellion, boldness, speaking my truth with exact details and timeline. Because my dosage of the double-sided curse of healing comes with victory. It comes with setting the captives free. It comes with reminding those who have endured similar tragedies that they too can overcome with a change of perspective, consistency of breaking old habits, removing of toxic people and environments. It may sound like there is no way to get this but I am here to tell you that you do have a choice to pick a side of this double-sided curse of healing. Either you back down and allow those to tell your own story or you can take your power into your own hands, and tell your story for you. You can start this off by doing daily affirmations, meditations, daily journaling about the things that trigger you or bother you, and remember progression is better than perfection. No one will ever be perfect on this earth but forward progress is better than no progression at all. The double-side curse can go away, and you can be successful on either path. I am picking the path of owning my power and finally grabbing the dirt-devil and cleaning house. Which side do you choose? Taking your power, or allowing others continue to hold your power for you.