Deprived

So many things to do, not enough time in the day! Get up! Get the kids dressed, clean the house, cook breakfast, wash clothes, run errands, sweat has become my new friend. Getting dressed and going out for a cocktail has not been an option, nor has lying down and closing my eyes only to hear the birds chirp been a suggestion. Exhausted beyond imagination has led me to want a change. I have decided to relax in an effortless and unforced way. I’ve decided to make a list of everything I need to do within the day, and create a log of the times in which I will perform these duties. Giving myself several hours throughout the day to be alone and meditate and pray. During these days I will definitely complete all necessary tasks, so that I can have 2 days in the week that I’m off duty. Being able to mentally recover and physically gather my strength will be amazing! Also creating a schedule for the kids, so that they will be able to eat and do the appropriate things for the day! As if hearing mommy thirty times thirty in a day doesn’t rupture the brain. Having a son with ADHD and mental disabilities are the most challenging especially when you’re diagnosed as well. Sometimes waking up is a challenge in itself. Legs tend to do what they want and that’s if arms will do anything. Walking and hearing the floors creek can even be intimidating to the nervous system. Peace and quiet is far from the hostile and noisy your mind tends to keep serving you. Even in those quiet moments something is there because the randomness of hearing absolutely nothing keeps you in the same sense of yesterday. Warm baths in the early A.M. while everyone is sleeping can definitely work if the sound of water didn’t disturb anyone . Maybe while the kids are at school a nap would help if I didn’t feel surrounded even when isolated. Power naps in between daily activities or the usual sleep on occasion. Maybe the phone off method would act as a help. Those one in a million nights where the kids are away at a family members house are so far away. Reading a lovely book or writing a poem to release the stress of a work overload tends to do the trick. Extensive yoga or maybe exercise in general will give me an urge to want to relax. Patience…..hmmm, maybe just patience alone will help me relax and feel less overwhelmed. Remaining in a calm state of mind when I can’t sleep or when I’m overwhelmed can definitely be the key to getting rest. Even in times when rest is available the mind and body won’t rest because it’s occupied with things that aren’t going away. So therefore the body rests but the mind remains at work causing you to feel tired even when you’ve rested. Improving my mental state and being calm will allow me to actually gain rest when resting and feel rejuvenated. Creating an atmosphere that hears and sees nothing in a negative aspect allows me to freely maneuver through out my day accepting responsibility knowing when I’m done I can rest as much as I would like. No closed doers, no isolation, no panicking, no excessive sweating, no unwanted desires. Rest is more than just sleeping and lying still, it’s the oneness one has with themselves to eliminate pressure and uneasiness. Having created so many resolutions for them to backfire has definitely brought me to this conclusion, having patience and allowing things to happen on their own time including rest will definitely have you amped up in no time