Dear 15 Year Old

Dear 15 year old Lexi,

Let me start by saying, I’m very proud of you. Teenage years are one of the most confusing and stressful times of adolescence. I know high school seems like the most important part of your entire life but trust me when I say it’s a very small part of your entire life. I’m not just saying that because I’m an adult now either.

For starters:

1. Do not look in the mirror and think something negative about yourself.

1. Do not look in the mirror and think something negative of yourself. Did you hear me? I said DO NOT. You are not fat, you are not ugly. You are beautiful. It amazes me how I look at old photos of myself and cannot believe that I thought anything less of myself. God made me in His image; therefore I have always been perfectly made. So thrive in that!

2. Forget the idea about losing your virginity. No, you don’t marry him and you won’t know about the love that lasts a lifetime for another 6 years or so. And if you ask me, it doesn’t even feel good until those 6 years have gone by... and if you don’t know what I mean then that’s clearly another reason why you shouldn’t lose your virginity.

3. Boys—they are all clueless at this age so don’t waste your time trying to figure them out. Make friends and have laughs! But expecting your high school relationships to be like the Cinderella Story isn’t realistic. In fact, a lot of movies are really JUST movies. DO NOT date anyone if you’re not ready and DO NOT date anyone that is younger than you! In fact, older = more mature 'cause boys are like wine. They get better as they age. To be honest, you’ll find out early that you’re pretty mature for your age once you hit your 20s. Just you wait for your Mr. Right. So be single and be proud. It’s never bad not to have a boyfriend because really at your age it’s like babysitting and not getting paid.

4. Girl friends—you do pretty well in this area. You can tell who is genuine and who is not. I know your personality is to try to be friends with everyone but if you don’t get the same effort reciprocated then don’t worry about it. Because at the end of the day you won’t even talk to 98% of them ever again.

5. Parties, alcohol, and weed. Well, one thing for sure is that all of these can wait and it’s a lot more enjoyable if you do. Yes I know you wanna have fun and be “cool.” That’s something most teenagers want and probably because you just want to feel apart of something big. It’s something you can laugh and reminisce on that Monday morning at school. I get it and I want you to go have fun. But if you can stand out and stand firm in a decision to not get tempted by alcohol or anything else for that matter, then do it! That’ll feel way better than trying to fit in. Plus, you don’t even know what drinks taste good so the hangover is definitely not worth it.

6. Rumors you deal with pretty well

6. Rumors you deal with pretty well. You don’t let it faze you because you know the mouth it came out of isn’t worth your energy. A good eye roll and shrug of your shoulders suffices and you can go back to your daily life. However, if any of it is true at one point or another, don’t hide behind it. Just own it and move forward. No one is a saint so don’t feel like anyone has the right to bring you to judgment day. That’s God’s job, not theirs.

7. “IF YOU WANNA BE SOMEBODY, IF YOU WANT TO GO SOMEWHERE, THEN YOU BETTER WAKE UP AND PAY ATTENTION.” You know where that is from so you know what that means. It means to get yourself focused in the school subjects you struggle in for the love of God! Yup, math and science isn’t your cup of tea but it doesn’t mean you should half ass those classes. Options for college could be so exciting if you would just work harder in these areas.

8. You deserve the best. So keep your expectations of how you should be treated high on the scale. That goes for your relationships and friendships. You deserve someone who boosts you up, not tears you down. Someone who has your back even when you’re not around. When it comes down to it, if someone is trying to make you feel like your worth less than who you are then you better cut that shit (excuse my language) fast. That isn’t aloud from anyone, I don’t care who they are. Treat others how you want to be treated. Be confident and be independent. Always.

9. Forgive yourself. Regardless, you’re going to make mistakes. Cut yourself some slack, you’re young. The mistakes is really what shapes you into who you’ll become in the future. So either you can make it into a positive future or a negative one. Don’t be quick to punish yourself for anything. Just learn from it and move forward. You’ll feel a lot happier too knowing you’re loving yourself more than anyone else is.

10. Keep your childhood heart alive! During a time when you’re in such a rush to grow up, don’t forget to just be a kid. Look at your dad as the number 1 man in your life as you did when you were 5 years old and not as the strict parent who doesn’t let you do anything. Ask your mom to brush your hair again instead of arguing with her. Because whether you notice it or not, the quicker you want to be older they are getting older too. Like a child does, keep loving on everyone! You’ve always had a trusting and loving heart so no matter how many times people let you down, don’t let that part of you go.

You end up pretty damn blessed.

I could go on and on about the do’s and don’ts but I have full confidence you are more than capable of getting through this time of your life. There’s always going to be something you want to go back and stop yourself from doing. If only there was a time machine, right? But all you can do is live and learn. Even if you disregard everything I just said, you end up pretty damn blessed if you ask me. Keep smiling and keep moving forward.

Much Love,

Lexi at 23 years old

P.S. Don’t be so mean to your little brother. LOL.