Beyond The Window

Time, the healer of all things, as we're told, will eventually calm my spirit. Indelible memories flood over me, pushing me this way and that. Sorrow unbearable, laughter untamed, and cherished silence all played their roles to mold my world. Lest I slump in my chair and sob uncontrollably, I take deep breaths, gather my emotions, and attempt to put things in perspective. Without a doubt, there are things out of our control. But it doesn't make it any easier. No, this passing year has delivered an indelible blow not just to my soul, but to others as well. Some say that sorrow is common to mankind, a life often filled with woes. Perhaps that's true, but it doesn't make the memories nor the emotions any less real, any less vivid. Some say it's just life and in time the impact will subside, and the trial will be over. And, I guess they're right in some respects. But they haven't walked where you and I have walked. They haven't felt what you and I have felt. And, they haven't loved as you and I have loved. That experience is reserved for the person touched the deepest by this passing year..... Having sipped my coffee, I listen to the stillness of the morning, the ticking of the wall clock, and the push of the wind against my window. Something 'unknown' this way comes. Unpredictable and unstoppable, the new year has begun. It brings decisions accompanied by consequences. Will it be a time that will try men's souls as one author penned? That is yet to be seen, experienced, and, with the tick of the clock, soon forgotten. At all cost, to thine own self be true. Love without condition. Live without regret. I press my face against this foggy window of time and squint hoping to catch a glimpse beyond the barrier but to no avail. Therefore, on my knees, I must pray that the unseen be met with the grace I need, with the mercy I don't deserve.

It is a time for meditation. Unresolved situations or circumstances that linger throughout this year bear heavily upon my spirit. For me, it's a time for resolution. There comes a time when we must let go! We must resolve within ourselves that to continue to worry or to continue to bind ourselves to certain people or groups must be reconsidered. Therefore, today, with much dedication, I'll review my commitments to some I've met along the way. Not everyone means you well. Not everyone adds positivity to your life. There are some we must let go of to maintain our own stability. Repentantly, I cast myself inwardly to sort out feelings that I must either change or ignore. I suppose we've all come to that fork in the road sometime in our lives.

This day we've been given an opportunity. This opportunity, one that's intangible but real, can change lives, fill those who are empty with hope, and set one's ship of life on a better course. The opportunity given to each of us is called "choice." When the clock strikes twelve midnight, for a fraction of a second, time is reset so that we can begin anew. The old year has passed into eternity, leaving us with dimly lit visions as to what might be. It brings with it a chance and a choice to do things differently, to do them better. Will we make a change? Can we make a change? And if so, what with the decision be? What will be the consequences of those decisions? Hopefully, the passing year has taught us lessons. Perhaps it opened our eyes a little wider so we can see a little clearer. Maybe the sorrow of last year taught us to love more intensely, to give unbegrudgingly, and cherish each second as if it were our last. Is it a foregone conclusion that we will make the right choices? That would be an unfounded assumption. Therefore, as with any opportunity given to us, we make the decisions. As we take daily possession of our new opportunity, let us remember it too will pass leaving us with the associated consequences.