3 Small Things I Do in 2020 to Make Me Feel Less Insecure

2020 has been rough for everyone. Like really really rough. The fact that the pandemic hit us earlier this year somehow has brought lots of mixed feelings.

As long as I remember, I’ve been always insecure about so many things since I was a kid — even the little things that you don’t think make sense.

One time I felt really insecure about my hair so I did everything I could to make it ‘better-looking’. While in reality, it’s all good! I have long straight black hair. I don’t look weird or anything with it, it’s just that I had to stop comparing myself with other girls.

While we can’t brush the insecurity in one go, there are things that I figured this year that I believe it works if I constantly apply them when the insecurity hits me. They seem so simple yet powerful ways of reducing your low-self esteem.

Identify Your Insecurity

Know exactly where’s the feeling comes from and take a step back when it shows up. You’ll notice your body will give you a clear signal, letting you know that you aren’t doing fine emotionally.

I like doing this as my first step to identify what’s really happening inside. I found it easier to take action later when I’m fully aware of why I feel a certain way.

But sometimes I also figured that I don’t have to do anything about it. Being insecure about my big nose doesn’t necessarily mean I have to change it right away. I know I might have a deeper self-esteem problem than that.

So next time you feel insecure, ask yourself. Expect an honest answer instead of sugar-coating it. You’ve got nothing to lose so being brutally honest to yourself will do you a huge favor.

Questions such as; why do I feel this way? Is there anything that I can do about this? Does this thought serve any good purpose in my life?

The answer might not come up right away but if you are keen to figure it out and stay connected with yourself, you’ll eventually find it.

Be Kind to Yourself

Last year was really hard for me. I went through a breakup from a relationship that I hold into for so many years. And the worst thing I did was to force myself to move on as soon as possible.

I was deeply insecure about how people would think of me. I couldn’t just take the fact that the relationship failed.

But instead of being kind to myself and taking my time, I kept complaining why couldn’t I move on sooner and a lot of judgments coming on the way from myself. Not only it results in me in longer pain but my insecurity also went up.

Sometimes we are being so hard on ourselves even though we know there is only so much we can control in life.

One thing that I learned this year about my insecurity is that it will never get better when I judged myself in a negative way, instead, I should have let it all out. Because the more I hold back, the longer I’d heal from it.

So next time you feel like you aren’t good enough, instead of beating yourself up and expecting too much, it’s better to acknowledge the feeling and talk to yourself in a positive loving way. This helps you get your confidence back.

Spend More Time Alone

It’s hard to stay in tune with yourself when you keep surrounding yourself with other people. I’m not saying you shouldn’t socialize, but if you find yourself feeling insecure easily, then it’s time to make more time just for you.

Though it’s still challenging for me to unplug from everything and everyone and prioritize my me-time, I found it always refreshing when I come back, and surprisingly the connections I have with people around me are a lot stronger.

This is mainly because when you spend your time alone, you tend to get to know yourself better with what you want, what to expect, and always be aware of how you feel because you keep in touch with your feelings.

This action will also help you stop comparing yourself with others. There is no need to do such a thing if you are already content with what you have in your life.

Final Thoughts:

We are all insecure in some ways. However, working on it constantly so it wouldn’t get too much is necessary so you can have more space for your happiness.

There were so many things that I was insecure about in the past and up to this day, sometimes I still think it’s crazy how much time I have wasted thinking about stuff that doesn’t really matter anyway.

I wish I knew sooner how to detect the feelings and come up with a solution instead of drowning in for the longest time.

So if currently, you feel really low about yourself, your relationship, or anything else in between, the first step is being aware of the feeling every time it shows up. From then you can start deciding what’s the best way to handle it.

Wishing you the best of luck.