Senior Coffee

Last fall, I wandered into a Wendy's to try out their pumpkin spice frosty. I sat in the restaurant savoring my icy treat. When I was finished, I went to the counter to get a soda. When I pulled out my card to pay, the young lady behind the counter waved me off saying, "I'll ring it in as a senior drink."

Senior? I was shocked that she assumed I was 55 or older! I am 55, but how did she know? Have I finally begun to look my age? All my life, everyone thought I was younger than my actual age. I took pleasure in this fact.

At 28, I was still being carded when I went out. ( This was a million years ago, before they carded anyone who looked under 40.) Up until the last few years, it was common for me to hear "you don't look your age." But about two years ago I made the decision to let my gray hair come in. I stopped using dye or bleach on my hair. Now, I have more gray hair than any other color.

When the young lady at Wendy's rightly assumed I was a senior, I immediately thought of coloring my hair. I mean, I was glad for a free drink, but at what price? I felt, well, old. It was a shock. I left Wendy's laughing at myself, but my pride was hurt too.

I sought validation of my continued youth from Facebook. Sharing my silly story made others laugh. My peers told me "your not old!" My grown children told me the same thing. It helped. Looking in the mirror helped too. Despite my gray hair, my skin has few wrinkles. I have blessed with good skin, and great skincare. But is it so awful to be old?

One of the greatest gifts of getting older has been becoming a Grandma. After 30 years of motherhood I graduated to Grand Mother. Grandmas usually have gray hair, wrinkles, and some sagging skin. I doubt my grandchildren care if I look younger. They care that through years of mothering, I have gained patience. They care that I am mature enough to know that nothing is as important as family. They appreciate my lack of self consciousness that shows up when I slide down a slide with them at the park.

My grand kids remind me that getting older comes with benefits. When I read to them, I reminded of the best days with my children. Those memories are much more precious than what I looked like when I was younger.

Getting older means knowing more. It means I know how to solve problems. It is an honor to realize I can fix so many things, simply because I've lived and learned. I am an expert at many things, because of my age. I have become a version of myself I am proud of.

David Bowie has been quoted as saying, "Aging is an extraordinary process where you become the person you always should have been." I agree. The priorities I have now, the way I handle myself, are gifts of aging. When I was younger, my temper got the best of me too many times. I was hard, and cold many times when I should have been soft, and warm. Benefits of aging.

Today I went to Mcdonald's and asked how much it was for a small coffee. The answer, "$1.05 for a senior coffee." The shock hit me again. I really look like a senior. I gratefully got my discounted coffee, took a sip, and didn't think about my hair.