How to Practice Self Care When You Don't Want To

It’s embarrassing to admit sometimes the things you let fall by the wayside when you’re struggling with your mental health. Just know you’re not the only one that has gone a week without brushing their teeth or taking a shower. It happens, and I know how hard it is to make yourself walk to the kitchen to get food, let alone stand in the shower. Here are some tips I have for when I’m feeling like total shit mentally.

Take a Shower Without Taking One

If you’re in one of those moods where just opening your eyes is too much work, taking a shower is like climbing Mt. Everest. Your hair is oily and makes your hands feel disgusting when you fix the bun it’s been in since you put it up after your last shower. You’re already feeling anti-social, and your insecurity about how B.O. is making it even worse. Your scalp is itching and your leg hair is looking like Austin Powers’ chest.

I feel you. I’ve been there. And to be 100% honest, I still struggle with it sometimes and don’t do some of the things I talk about here because even these can be too much in some severe times. But, if you can push yourself to do at LEAST one of these things when you’re struggling getting out of bed, you’ll feel better. I can’t promise you this, but it’s worth a shot. It always makes me feel proud of myself when I brush my hair for the first time in two weeks.

Baby wipes and deodorant: Life saver. Quick wipe under the pits and some of your smell good stick and you at least don’t smell like you’ve been hiding under your blanket for the last month.

Brush your mane: I know this can be hard to do too, but it helps with the shedding that’s bound to happen when you do finally shower and brush it.

Dry shampoo and leave in conditioner: I don’t do this personally simply because I don’t have dry shampoo and never think to buy some when I’m feeling good let alone when I’m feeling shitty. My hair gets way too greasy to put leave in conditioner in it, but if you do use the dry shampoo, you might want to use some of this to soften it up.

Shave them jungle pits: I know not everyone cares about this one, but personally, this is probably the one I do the most when I’m feeling stuck. I just put a pea size dot of my body wash in my armpit and rub it around, get my hands wet and dab my pits. Then I get my razor wet and I’m good to go. No more stinky pits or embarrassing hair.

Getting Rid of Monster Breath

This one is honestly pretty simple.

Mouthwash or chewing gum: The most simple solution for monster breath. If you get nauseous as a result of depression or anxiety, try some kids fluoride rinse or a less intense mint flavor mouthwash or gum. Watermelon gum breath is still better than nothing.

Try just brushing your tongue: My tongue being gross bugs the crap out of me and is usually what will drive me to actually brush instead of other ways to cover bad breath. I know some may say, “Well, if you’re already brushing your tongue, why not take a sweep at your teeth while you're at it?” Yes, you could do that, and I honestly suggest that you do, but sometimes, just that extra minute of standing there exerting that energy is too much.

If you can push yourself to at least one of, you did SOMETHING for yourself today.

Pamper Yourself...

… By just putting some lotion on your hands and feet. That’s it. If you do that today, you took care of yourself. Dry skin hurts. Don’t let yourself get dry skin.

Here are a couple extra steps if you’re feeling up to it:

Face wipes: I’ve never been one to use a liquid cleanser if I’m not in the shower. It’s messy trying to splash it off my face and blah blah blah. I just never liked it. My mom always tried to get me to do it and I refused. And then she discovered face wipes. Hallelujah because I swear my acne would have been a million times worse during some points in my life if I didn’t use those. They’re simple to use at night to wipe the day's air toxins off and feel a tiny bit refreshed.

Moisturizer: Even if you didn’t wipe your face first, moisturizer still feels good, and it helps keep your hands soft. It takes a few seconds and once you put it in your hand, you can head to bed while you’re putting it on!

Soak your feet: Get some Epsom salt and a storage tote next time your at the store. When you're feeling terrible, fill it with some warm water, add some salt and your feet to it, and you’re good to soak. It may not sound like much, but it does feel relaxing, and it’ll get rid of any foot odor you’ve accumulated since your last shower.

Read a Book

Surprisingly, this one can be pretty difficult if you don’t make yourself push through the first chapter, or the book description. But if you can find a book that immerses you, it is such an amazing way to escape reality. When my parents would fight when I was in junior high, I hid at Hogwarts with Harry Potter and friends. I read the books over and over and over because it made me feel like I was actually there. I’ve had a couple other book series that captured me over the years, but none quite like that.

MAKE SOME ART!!!

Some of these may be difficult to do when you’re in a deep dark place, but if you can bring yourself to do something, try some of these. They have helped me over the years when I’m manic or depressed to help level me out a little bit. It gives me something to do when I’m depressed and have no interest in anything, and when I’m manic it gives me something to focus my energy on. They’re all mindful activities so they’ll help when anxiety is high.

These are some of my favorite simple arts that I can sit and do, or have been the most helpful during my episodes:

Pour some paint: You can get some paint at Walmart for 50 cents and thin it with some water like Rinske Douna shows us in this video. When I started, I was nervous about ruining canvases, so I used poster boards taped to cardboard until I felt confident enough to use canvas panels, and worked my way to stretched canvases.

Finger painting: You can either use that same paint from Walmart that I just mentioned or some actual finger paint, and a poster board and do as the kids do. I find it’s therapeutic for me to finger paint with my littles or even by myself. It feels good on my fingers, and that alone calms me down. You can be mindful of what the paint feels like, whether you smell it or not, what sounds you hear as your painting, and pay attention to how your body is feeling and notice if it's relaxed or not. Obviously, use your eyes, but try not to be so focused on what your making instead of feeling the sensation of the process.

BATH PAINT: Another awesome thing that my kids introduced me to. Pretty much finger painting in the bath with some colorful soap.

Coloring books: I find I worry about “ruining” my coloring pages in case I mess up, so I make a copy to color and I have a binder with my coloring pages. That way, if I find a design I really like, I can do it again in different colors. The swear word and motivational quote ones are fun, and the mandala ones are extremely meditative.

You know those friendship bracelets you made with your girlfriends when you were 10? That’s macramé. It’s an art of tying knots and it’s so soothing! As I’m typing this I’m considering pulling out some of my embroidery string and making something! You can make so many things with macramé, and you can find a ton of ideas on Pinterest.

Crochet gives me the same kind of relaxation that macramé does. You’re essentially looping a piece of yarn over and over again. You can get complicated and make a blanket or something, or you could keep it simple and make a washcloth that takes 10 minutes or so.

Grow Some Nature

No matter what time of year it is or where you are or what the weather is like outside, you can most likely grow SOMETHING inside at least. If you can't do an outside garden, find one indoor plant, figure out what kind of soil dampness it likes, and just make sure to water it when it needs it. Maybe try setting an alarm on the days that you need to give it some water. Keep a couple water bottles next to it so you can easily water it without much effort.

So there you have it. These are some things that I do or have done to help myself get some self-care when I'm feeling down. Let me know how these work for you or if you have anything to add! Take care, my lovelies <3