Freckles joins the gym

FRECKLES JOINS THE GYM

For the past 412 weeks Freckles has been stating that she is going to rejoin the gym, well it's actually only been 3 weeks but it feels longer.

She is very diligent about her morning beach power walks, but she is constantly taken out of motion and has to stop her power strides for little cute dogs that always need a pat and old men who want a new friend.

She has been wanting to up her game, so she is going to join the gym and get the Freckle fit again. This has been talked about for some time (412 weeks) but then, last Friday night when we sitting out the back with her Gallon Glass of Red Wine in hand and half a block of Salted Caramel Dark Chocolate in her lap, she burst out with “that’s it, on Monday I’m joining the gym”, I pretend to be interested but don’t ask any further questions as I know that the next 45 minutes will be explaining to me why she needs to do this.

Anyway, Freckles Schwarzenegger finally decides to head off to bed all enthusiastic after finishing her bucket of wine and chocloate.....Sunday was going to be ‘best gym in the world’ research day.

Sunday morning comes and she is off, Google, Yahoo, MSN, all the search engines were pinging as the little Freckles powered through comments, reviews and costs for the start of her new endeavor.

After much research, she decides on Snap Fitness at Caloundra, it has all the bestest ever equipment and has 24/7 access. So, Monday morning she is heading in to join us both up.....how the hell I got talked into I don’t know, but I agreed as I do with all her requests.

Excitedly she heads off to bed early ready for Monday morning. I come to bed and she is in a deep sleep, dreaming of running on the treadmill or chasing robbers, I don’t know but she was running in her sleep grunting...either way she was having fun.

Monday arrives and off we go, I park the car and Freckles heads up the stairs to the reception to start her new life.

Walking up the stairs, she hears a super enthusiastic young man's voice yell out from above.

“Welcome to Snap Fitness, great to see you”!

Freckles looks up to see Super Fit 25 y.o Dream Boat Boy eagerly awaiting for her to finally stagger up the stairs so he can rape the money from her purse in gym fees.

Freckles says “hi”, but doesn't really notice him till she gets to the top and looks up.....

Dream Boat is standing there after his workout with a g-sting singlet on, all sweaty with muscles bulging everywhere with a smile you’d get sun burnt from.

She went from Freckles Schwarzenegger to a blushing schoolgirl that didn’t know how to talk properly.

She managed to get out that she wanted to join the gym and as he gave her the paperwork to complete, he asked her questions. Freckles isn't good with two tasks, especially when someone that looks like the statue of a perfect man is talking to her.

Dream Boat: So, are you a local or are you on holidays?

Freckles: Oh, I've just moved here, we have been travelling around NSW for the past 6 months.

Dream Boat: Great where was your favourite spot?

Freckles..........um

Still Freckles.......um

Freckles trying to remember just one spot we visited out of the 100's: Minnie Waters!

Dream Boat: Where is that?

Freckles.........um

Still Freckles.........um...........um.......in the NSW on a beach (yes she said exactly that).

Dream Boat …..ah...um OK.

Freckles........sorry I'm not very good at Geometry.

Dream Boat ….......?

Freckles.........

Freckles....F### I mean Geography (blushing badly now).

I get up the stairs after parking the car, say G’day to Dream Boat and make fun of his g string singlet by asking if they are compulsory. He is so glad to see me so he doesn’t have to talk to the special needs lady in front of him anymore....I turn to Freckles and she sweating like a Nun in a cucumber field.

We finish up handing over a week's wages to Dream Boat and he gives us the tour of the gym, the more he talks to Freckles, the more she sweats and the keeps the vocabulary of a 4-year-old....she only nods now and her mouth keeps making that dry sticky gasping sound.

I notice the patrons checking out the sweaty lady walking around. So, I hurry things up and get the blushing beauty out of there and into some fresh air.

I could see her relief to be out and we hop in the car and I asked if she was happy she joined, she again just nodded, I think she was still trying to get the breath back Dream Boat stole from her.

“Oh by the way Freckles” I said, “that young bloke in the lady's singlet is a Personal Trainer, so I booked you in for one-on-one training sessions with him for the first month”.