Giggles & Gags

Giggles & Gags

1. Q: Why did the scarecrow win an award?

A: Because he was outstanding in his field!

2. Q: What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

A: Nacho cheese!

3. Q: Why can't your nose be 12 inches long?

A: Because then it would be a foot!

4. Q: What did the ocean say to the shore?

A: Nothing… it just waved.

5. Q: Why don't scientists trust atoms?

A: Because they make up everything!

6. Q: Why was the math book sad?

A: It had too many problems.

7. Q: What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie?

A: Sophisticated.

8. Q: Why did the bicycle fall over?

A: Because it was two-tired.

9. Q: What did one wall say to the other wall?

A: "I'll meet you at the corner!"

10. Q: How does a penguin build its house?

A: Igloos it together.

11. Q: What do you call fake spaghetti?

A: An impasta.

12. Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor?

A: Because it was feeling crumby.

13. Q: What did the zero say to the eight?

A: Nice belt!

14. Q: Why can't you give Elsa a balloon?

A: Because she'll let it gooo...

15. Q: What do you call a dog magician?

A: A labra-cadabra-dor.

16. Q: What did the grape do when it got stepped on?

A: It let out a little whine.

17. Q: Why did the computer go to the doctor?

A: It had a virus.

18. Q: Why did the tomato turn red?

A: Because it saw the salad dressing.

19. Q: What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?

A: “Supplies!”

20. Q: Why did the student eat his homework?

A: Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!

21. • Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?

A: In case he got a hole in one.

22. • Q: What do you call a bear with no teeth?

A: A gummy bear!

23. • Q: Why was the computer cold?

A: Because it left its Windows open.

24. • Q: What do you call two birds in love?

A: Tweethearts.

25. • Q: Why don’t eggs tell each other secrets?

A: Because they might crack up!

26. • Q: How do cows stay up to date?

A: They read the moos-paper.

27. • Q: Why did the banana go to the hospital?

A: Because it wasn’t feeling well.

28. • Q: What do you call a sleeping bull?

A: A bulldozer.

29. • Q: Why did the man run around his bed?

A: Because he was trying to catch up on sleep!

30. • Q: What do you get when you cross a snowman and a dog?

A: Frostbite.

31. • Q: Why don’t scientists trust atoms?

A: Because they make up everything!

32. • Q: Why did the math book look sad?

A: Because it had too many problems.

33. • Q: What do you call fake spaghetti?

A: An impasta.

34. • Q: Why did the scarecrow win an award?

A: Because he was outstanding in his field!

35. • Q: Why can’t your nose be 12 inches long?

A: Because then it would be a foot!

36. • Q: What do you get when you cross a snowman and a dog?

A: Frostbite.

37. • Q: Why did the bicycle fall over?

A: It was two-tired.

38. • Q: Why don't skeletons fight each other?

A: They don’t have the guts.

39. • Q: What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie?

A: Sophisticated.

40. • Q: What did one wall say to the other wall?

A: “I’ll meet you at the corner.”

41. • Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?

A: In case he got a hole in one!

42. • Q: How do you organize a space party?

A: You planet.

43. • Q: What did the ocean say to the beach?

A: Nothing — it just waved.

44. • Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor?

A: Because it was feeling crumby.

45. • Q: What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?

A: Nacho cheese.