To Whom This May Concern

To whom this may concern:

Please consider this my formal tender of resignation.

For as of this moment, I resign from being resigned to anything we might expect of me. I’m done. Finished. Kaput. Outta here.

I’m tired. I’m tired of being. I’m tired of having to be all the things we expect me to be. I’d say I’m tired of being everything you want me to be, but you never wanted me to be anything other than a bit of reliable background noise to your existence, a transmutable & completely replaceable extra to the sonder of your story. I would say that I’m tired of being all that you need me to be, but I know better. Should I not be, the world would simply fill any gap that might remain as I fade from memory entirely.

I do take some comfort in that. And so let it be. Let me be resigned.

What is it that has me so worn & ready to cash in my chips? Please, resign me to elaborate.

Since we have seen fit to call the providence & call of God that which it is not, to reserve it for ourselves, our kind, our race, our class, our sexuality, our orientation, our belief system, our denomination, our faith, our party, our nation, & our rules, rendering God nothing more than a servant & others no more than subjects to our whim, I shall resign for now & to the end of time from being resigned.

Since we have seen fit to demonize the poorest & most vulnerable as scapegoats for our sins, not to mention the sins of those before whom we would grovel for whatever crumbs they might offer, I shall resign from being resigned.

Since we would close our hearts, souls, homes & borders to the stranger for fear that there might be a single rapist, gang member, murderer or thief among the multitude of refugees & immigrants looking simply for a chance to live &/or better themselves, I shall resign from being resigned.

Since we would close our hearts, souls, clinics & hospitals to the sick & infirm who cannot afford healthcare & pose a burden to the pockets of those whose favor we would curry, I shall resign from being resigned.

Since we would close our hearts, souls & grocery stores to those who are hungry, thirsty & in need because “they should just get a job” though there are none who will hire for want of experience, hygiene, references, home or identification, I shall resign from being resigned.

Since we would close our hearts, souls & doors to those who are naked or homeless because surely there are workhouses or shelters or shanties or bridges or boxes or newspapers under which they might hide & we’re afraid they might hurt us or make a mess of something that is ours, I shall resign from being resigned.

Since we would close our hearts, souls & gatherings to those who are lonely & isolated because they don’t fit in, don’t smell, act or look as we deem appropriate, or aren’t themselves very likable or sociable, I shall resign from being resigned.

Since we would close our hearts, souls & time to those who are in prison because they aren’t good, law-abiding citizens like us, I shall resign from being resigned.

Do I need to get more pointed? So be it.

Since we have seen fit to elevate to the highest position in the land a most anti- to anything Christ was, is, or ever will be, I shall resign from being resigned.

Since we would allow that this one, & this one only, is above the law & is the law & not even the courts have jurisdiction over him, I shall resign from being resigned.

Since we would allow him to claim that lives do not matter, be they yellow, brown, black, red or blue if they don’t suit him—& even applaud him for it—I shall resign from being resigned.

Since we would allow him to claim that it is his privilege & right to grab any “p***y” he likes ‘cause he’s got money, dismissing it as no more than locker room talk & boys will be boys no matter how many times he’s been sued &/or adjudicated as liable for sexual assault, I shall resign from being resigned.

Since we would allow him to adjudicate that no woman is of any more worth than the uterus or fetus she carries or the utility he finds in her, I shall resign from being resigned.

Since we would allow him to deny due process to those without documents simply because he says they are bad, I shall resign from being resigned.

Since we would allow him to deport students & teachers because they disagree with him, I shall resign from being resigned.

Since we would allow him to cut funding to schools, universities & states because they strive for diversity & inclusion, I shall resign from being resigned.

Since we would allow him to cut services & monies desperately needed by those most at risk, I shall resign from being resigned.

Since we would allow him to take bribes & flagrantly abuse his office for personal gain while claiming there is nothing to see, I shall resign from being resigned.

Since we would allow him to claim truth is fake & that lies are veracity & even agree with him, I shall resign from being resigned.

Since we would allow him to accuse his adversaries of the crimes he openly commits & we simply respond, “Sounds about right,” I shall resign from being resigned.

Since we would allow him to say the most vicious slanders against others & simply laugh because we don’t like them either, I shall resign from being resigned.

Since we would allow him to threaten those who oppose him with mountains of spurious investigations, legal action, jail time & more, all in an effort to silence dissent, I shall resign from being resigned

Since we would allow him to celebrate tyrants & hate groups & those who abuse with utter caprice & even celebrate with him, I shall resign from being resigned.

Since we would allow him to abandon & alienate allies & all those who strive, though imperfectly, to support & bring about freedom, equality & justice for all, I shall resign from being resigned.

Since we would allow him to lie about anything & simply agree it’s the truth, I shall resign from being resigned.

Since we would deny there is any dissonance between what he says, tweets or does & what we have claimed we hold dear, I shall resign from being resigned.

And since we live in a time horrifically divided where to speak anything is to invite vitriol & shunning, I shall resign myself from being resigned…,

…to hate. I shall rather be resigned to remember that all are in need of grace, including me, including him, & to hope & wish for the best for all even when it is not reciprocated.

For though God halt my tongue, should one word be spoken or action taken that harms another soul, I shall not be resigned to silence, inaction or anything else we might expect of me.

Consider this my formal resignation from ever needing to be acceptable or welcomed by any. As I have oft loved to say (to my wife’s great chagrin), “Don’t ask me what it feels like inside or out, ‘cause I’ve never been hot nor ever been cool. I’ve always been a nerd.” Though it relegate me to the status of outsider & outcast, so let me be resigned.

I shall always endeavor, e’en though poorly, to resign myself to care as I am able.

If that means resigning myself to eternal evanescence, so let it be & let me embrace it.

With complete & utter resignation,

ydnaR enyaW kconK-nosilleJ (what my closest friends call me—

otherwise, let it simply be) Randy