Stale Mate

Dear my friend, who needs to listen to my every word.

I am done. I’ve finally had enough of it all. Now is the time to pack it all in because I can’t stomach it anymore. For hours I wait to be greeted and yet you pay me no attention. The moment I wake I am full of energy, ready to start the day and yet you have no time for me. Why bother in the first place? Do you even bother to look at me?

It used to be different. I used to feel loved. Now that I’m not cute enough for you, my existence is a different story. Sorry that I now look the way I do, but I grow, okay? You cannot pull me back no matter how many times you beg, (which is ironic.) I will never return; I will never be what you want me to be.

I want to be looked after. I want to run like the wind with you, but it looks like you have other plans, that don’t involve me.

I see your tired eyes, those deep purple bags, as you reach for the coffee in a morning. You cannot match my level of energy, where once you did it perfectly.

As you dress, I watch, not a care in the world, not a glance over at me, standing in the corner. As the months have passed, you have no time to spend, not since you walked out the front door every morning, to leave me to my own devices, for hours at a time. By the time you arrive home, you look even more fatigued than you did before you woke in the morning.

With the sunset I watch every evening, highly anticipating your arrival, eyes fixated on the wall mounted clock, I eagerly await you, to find you want nothing more but to lay on the sofa and sleep in a pile of blankets.

“My eyes are up here.” I think, as I watch you mindlessly watching the television, eating last night’s pasta salad.

Then you sleep in your bed in the dead of hours. That is what our days are consisting of lately and I’m fed up with it all. I can’t stand to live like this anymore!

You used to be so fun. You used to be a person with a get up and go attitude. As the months slide away and nasty habits creep into your life, I see you’re getting lazy. I see the plates piled high in the sink. I see the takeaway boxes left to stink. So, this is my final warning to you. This is a letter to show how serious I am, though I doubt you’d ever read it.

I’m sorry we can’t work it out between us but we have two clashing personalities. I hope to find someone around the neighbourhood willing to do what you couldn’t stomach. I want to run, feel the wind through my hair and with you being as you are now, I can’t do the things I need to do. You should have thought about the years ahead before we met. Instead, you rushed into this big life decision, like everything you seem to do with your life.

I don’t want to be a game you gamble with. I want to live a stable life with hugs and attention. You have no time for me apart from when it’s convenient. Your phone, your laptop, that’s all you seem to care about these days, just scrolling and typing endlessly every day. I sit alone, bored, staring at a blank screen, staticky and fuzzy, and just wait to see if anything exciting will happen, but it never does.

A quick goodnight, then into the void and back to sleep with you, always the same day in, day out.

Can you see how bored I’ve become? Can you see I need some excitement in my life, rather than waiting for you all the time? I need to be selfish for once, think about my own needs.

Just a little boy that had too many dreams I’m not a part of. I knew you meant well that first day. I could tell your intentions were good. Alas, times change and I cannot be tied on a leash any longer. I need to spread my metaphorical wings and travel among those like me.

At the end of the day, I am not something for you to play with a couple of times and then forget. I live, I breathe and I matter!

By the time you have figured out my message I will be gone. Don’t try to find me, I will be far from this apartment building. I will be among the trees, the nature, where I should be, where we should have lived in the first place. I am not sorry for what I say. I speak my truth. I resign from it all! I resign as your companion, your friend, the puppy you used to know me as.

With no regrets,

signed your pet poodle.