Scrolling

Finding a job is difficult. You find yourself endlessly scrolling, clicking, reading. The whole process is nothing but annoying. Then, you find a job that’s perfect for you, it fits you right and checks all boxes: good location, great hours, great benefits, great pay and above all the perfect job. So you craft your resume to fit that outline, you write up a cover letter just for that job. Then, you wait and wait for your cellphone to buzz in your pocket with an unknown number or with the company name it. You exhale as you answer the call and they offer you a time to do the interview. Without thinking what you are doing that day you automatically agree. Then, you are in the next step it’s research, research and finding out everything you can and you rehearse in your head all their values and incorporate that into your answers. You write out why you are capable of the job and when the day of the interview arrives your stuck in a panic because you did not sleep well. You do all their values right things to pump yourself up for the job, you turn up the music and dance or you tell yourself “I am confident” in the mirror over and over again. You revise everything you will say. Then, it’s time you turn on your laptop you ensure everything is working right. Okay, the call comes in and you can feel that the back of your neck is already sweating.

You remind yourself to smile and eye contact. They start asking you all the questions and you crush it until the last one. Wait…what? I didn’t rehearse that? Why are they asking me this? Oh right I need an answer…you ask for a minute to compose your thoughts but before you know your mouth is doing talking without your mind. You keep talking and you have no idea where this is going…yup completely improvised. Everything happened so suddenly and quickly. They ask you “did you want to go back to any of those questions?” You reply with a fast “no” before you have a chance to think about it and then before you know it the interview finished and then you think that was bad.

That was really bad. Your shaking and can’t help it but sob a little bit while petting your dog. Then, you decide to compose yourself and drive to the nearest Dairy Queen and order some soft pretzels for you to chew on to make yourself feel better. It helps the mood automatically.

In short, I hate interviews, I hate the process of applying for a job and waiting to hear back from them. Two weeks they said. Okay, but no one asked for references so it probably fell through. It’s the feeling of getting your hopes up and then feeling like a failure even though it’s just a job and probably not meant to be. Yet, the feeling of despair is still there. Because again you need to do it all. You need to scroll down and keep scrolling until that happens again where you find the perfect fit, you apply and the whole things starts again. Being a hard worker or strong work ethic or having the qualifications are not enough now it’s all about a positive work culture and creating the right “vibe” by choosing the correct person for the job. It’s all about getting along with the team and can you handle it? Starting a new job is hard too, but interviews are the worst you say something stupid and you keep thinking back to I should have said that instead of this. But it’s all out of your control there’s no repeat button. The important thing to remember is to keep scrolling.