Meant-or.

Dearest M,

For when we are both old and grey rocking side by side, here 'tis recorded, for you, for the world, whilst I'm still lucid, my reflection, my gratitude, of us . . .

You may recall, it all began with 2 old boyfriends, 1 new credit card debt, and 0 current career.

Looking at this mysterious slender brunette who was now renting the spare room at my ex’s apartment, I didn’t feel easy. She was a highly guarded being, almost cold, and I could never have imagined getting close to her. As long as we could peacefully co-exist when I’d frequently hang out at my ex's home, then I guess that was all that was needed, right? I could never have been so wrong in my entire life.

That leggy, green eyed girl, fundamentally shaped my world for the next 21 years . . . and counting.

It was a living room floor tea party one weekday, that was the pivotal moment.

One brick at a time being chipped away from the wall between us, we sipped as we bonded over shared horoscope elements, the freedom of not being at work during the day, being in our early 20s in the new Millenia in a party-driven suburb, and not truly knowing what we wanted to do with our lives.

I forlornly expressed my dire situation of having maxed out my recent first ever credit card at 21, and having no way to pay it off, having recently resigned from a job I thought I didn’t want. 20 mins later, whilst quipping a cheeky line about champagne as she headed to the kitchen for more tea, she suddenly leapt over the couch in true ‘Tom Cruise on Oprah’ style, excitedly exclaiming that she had a way for me to get the money … and actually some for herself too in the process.

Fast forward 12 days, and here I was embarking on a flight to Asia to live and work with this relative stranger for 3 months. It was not a 3 month adventure …. It has been a 21 year adventure of life. She has taught me about life, love, law of attraction, how to be less here and more there, she’s expanded my vocabulary and knowledge on an infinite platter of subjects. She’s introduced me to countless opportunities over decades to expand my heart, soul, mind and finances. Every time I’ve stopped believing in myself, she has been the wind beneath my wings. She has listened to me, really listened, even when I’m sure her ears were numb from my repetition. She was there. She’s always been there.

Not only has she saved me, she’s taught me how to save me. Something far more valuable.

We’ve giggled ourselves until we’ve rolled off couches and nearly choked from laughter, we’ve danced tabletops around the world, we have our own secret vocabulary, we’ve waltzed home in the light of day in foreign countries after immersing ourselves in local culture all night. Most adults don't get to delight in all the fun of the world with their sculptor.

She has shaped me. The layers of plasticine in me, a free being, that have the capacity for external forces to shape them, have been shaped by Marienne.

Ruminating, we both know with every fibre of our being that the universe carefully planned the atoms of us to collide, and weave the fabric of our lives forever through the threads of: me dating the older goofy guy who wasn’t really right for me and then remaining his friend, her splitting with her live-in partner and needing to rent a room – the room rented being from an ad in the paper for a building a block away, which was my ex's apartment, me running up a credit card debt and being in need of a creative solution to pay it off whilst jobless, Marienne knowing a way and being at a crossroads in her life whereby running off to a foreign country with a near stranger, was an easily possible thing.

The most delicious jigsaw, perfectly designed for two soul sisters to unite and tread a path together.

Meant-ors.

After all, indeed BOTH each other’s hero.