Life as me

Did you ever get that feel of I just wish I could be a child again? Well with me a lot more then I would like to admit. It is funny when I think about it because I didn't have a bad childhood but I also didn't have a great one, my first memory was when I was two years old we were very poor lived in a car my mom, dad, sister, brother and I. You see my father was an alcoholic he would rather buy alcohol then food or pay rent so our home was a car and as a child I thought it was normal, we would park the car park at people's homes we would use they outside tap to bath in summer and winter this went on for about a year, when I bathed my mouth use to turn blue from the cold but I look at it as I survived. One night we were at the car park and one of the house's caught on fire from a gas leak I remember the child and mom came out with a few burn marks but the father didn't make it out on time I felt so bad I remember screaming and crying it is not normal for a two year old to see that. We lived also in a very dangerous area so we heard many shooting and the police we would just close our eyes and sleep praying that tomorrow will be better but truth be told it got worse, My mother did hide money so that we can buy food everyday but just this one day we left the car alone and they broke in took the food and threw the food all over the car I was hungry and sad thinking about it make's me want to cry. My father was drunk one night and tried to light his cigarette with a match but instead of throwing it outside the window it flew back in and the car set alight at that moment I was thinking about the house fire my mother grabbed my brother my father grabbed my sister and he said to my mother to leave me because i'm not his child to make it clear I am his but because i'm the youngest he always thought i'm not his, well my mother grabbed me and she burnt her hand there was this little dam near by so we ran so that she can put her hand under water she also did grab some clothes from us but most got destroyed by the fire. My father got the fire out and with the burnt car he drove away with my sister and brother my mom and I were left there, the police did show up and took us to the police station for the night because they said gangs will kill us if we stay in the road they tried to search for my father but didn't find him until the next morning. I'm going to leave it there and post part 2 of my life as a child if you would want a part 2 but thanks for everyone that read i'm atleast a survivor see you in the next chapter.