It’s A Man’s World

For far too long I have had it drummed into me that it’s a man’s world. Well, first off, I am not convinced it ever was, and second, it most certainly hasn’t been for me in my lifetime.

It all starts at a very young age with the audacious claim that girls are made of sugar and spice and everything nice. On the other hand, boys are made of snakes, frogs, snails, and puppy dog tails.

At school, not a single girl ever got the cane across their fingers or backside for clear misbehavior. The boys got it simply for having a wonky tie!

In my teens, I came across all manner of inequalities. At nightclubs, the men had to pay to enter. The girls got in free. A man had to hold open a door, give up his seat on the bus, let the woman get in the lifeboat, and be prepared to drown.

And speaking of those nightclubs; I all too well remember once asking a girl for a dance, which she readily accepted. A minute into moving dust on the dance floor, Madam suddenly stopped, thrust her hand between my legs, grabbed me very painfully by the genitals, and looked me in the eye with an evil grin saying “Sorry Babe, your balls aren’t big enough,” then turned her back on me and strode off back into the darkness. That was tantamount to sexual assault. These days if a man dared to do that to a woman he would be up in court for sexual assault and battery.

At home, I had four sisters, and every single one of them physically abused me and, in the case of one elder sister, sexually abused me.

It was pretty much the same story with my two ex-wives, both of whom cheated on me and fleeced me of every single penny I worked hard for all of my life.

And to make matters worse, those two exes also committed the most appalling case of parental alienation. Out of four children, I have little contact with one, my eldest son, by my first ex-wife.

In the workplace, I have had both male and female bosses, and I have to tell you the females were just as bad as any badass male boss.

Back in the old days, women used to be able to retire at sixty years of age, five years before men. And women, as a rule, lived a lot longer to boot.

After all of this, you can be forgiven for thinking that I am some sort of misogynistic, woman-hating, beaten-down old man. You could not be more mistaken. I am as happy as Larry, whoever he is, and blissfully remarried to a lovely woman. I also have many marvelous female friends.

Many years ago, after I became a qualified teacher, I went to see if I could get a job at a private language academy. The receptionist told me that there was indeed a vacancy, but I didn’t have a chance. Why?

“Because you’re a man.”

“And?”

“Well, all of our clients are young children.”

“And?”

“Well, we all know what men are like with young children, don’t we.”

Absolutely disgusting. I was being judged according to the lowest common denominator of masculinity, sexually predatory, abusive, and physically aggressive, men. This goes along with the mistaken belief that all men are bastards, which is as appalling as the comment that all women are bitches. Totally unacceptable in a civilized society.

If people see a man hit a woman in public, they quite rightfully call him a monster. He is.

If people see a woman hit a man they say things like “Well, he probably deserved it.”

They say a man should never raise his hand to a woman. I agree! However, what if she is attempting to stab him to death in the heart? “Oh please darling, be my guest.”?

Over fifteen years ago a certain European country introduced a new law, Gender Violence, based on the premise that all men are guilty, by virtue of being male and all women are innocent, due to being female. The result of that law is that it is cynically used and abused by women with an axe to grind with their husbands, like telling them off for overspending on their credit cards.

I personally know of a few cases where a woman scratched herself all over her chest then went to the police to accuse her husband of abuse. He was arrested and spent the weekend in jail. The following Monday morning the woman returned to the police and tried to withdraw the accusation. The police said no, explain yourself to the judge.

The judge asked the woman what she thought she was playing at and she said “It’s because I love him. But sometimes he makes me angry by shouting at me for spending too much of his money on his credit card.”

On that occasion, the judge told the woman “Madam, you do not know what love is. One more move like that and you are going straight to jail. Case dismissed.”

At one point a high-ranking judge spoke out about the high percentage of false accusations by women who just wanted to get their man put in jail under false pretenses. The judge was admonished by the government who accused him of trying to undermine their legal efforts to reduce male violence against women. No more was heard from that judge who I last heard was compelled to retire.

The problem is that when the Government brought out the Gender Violence Law, they defined it far too loosely, leaving the law very much open to abuse. I recall reading the Government papers explaining that Gender Violence begins with “Ignoring your partner’s feelings.” Oh, what a can of worms that opened.

What that meant for a lot of vindictive women was that a top left off the tube of toothpaste, or the rubbish not disposed of, or a birthday card forgotten, could be maliciously misconstrued as Gender violence. And if you think I am joking or exaggerating, think again. I spent the best part of fifteen years in dozens of courts having to deal with this sort of nonsense.

When I spoke to the courts to try to have it stopped I was told that the judges are under political pressure to treat every case as serious, just in case. When I told them about the ruinous effect on my ability to earn a living, running to and from the courts, they just told me that their hands were tied.

I was once prosecuted for calling her stupid after she gave a very severe beating. I was also prosecuted for accusing her of having an affair with another man, which she was!

Another time she had me prosecuted for stealing clothes as a result of my failing to return a T-shirt belonging to my son. The clothing was in fact in the wash after my son got tomato stains from eating pizza all over it. Yet when one day (one of far too many) she attacked me and did me serious physical harm the authorities simply laughed at me and mocked me for being a wimp.

In general, the media highlights male violence against women and tends to sweep female violence against men under the carpet. The result is that it feels like there is a witch hunt going on, and men are the witches.

Another intriguing fact is that the world over, women are treated far more leniently for violent crimes than men are for the very same crime! It is not hard to find the statistics.

Sentencing disparity

Wikipedia https://en.wikipedia.org › wiki › Sentencing disparity.

Finally, to give some sense of balance to this thorny subject, I do believe that the vast majority of men and women are decent law-abiding folk. The problem is that women are seen as the ‘Gentler' or 'Delicate' sex’ and men as ‘Uncouth brutes.’ Women are judged by the example of all the good nurturing mothers. Men are judged on all the horrible male swine that mistreat women. And until the law takes a likewise balanced view, nothing will ever change.