Every Thought I Had During Ikemen Sengoku

Chapter 5 (1 - 5)

• Moon Moon. How many times do I have to tell you that I'M NOT READY TO KISS
• Is THaT WiERd
• It's a normal part of your life to threaten and then kiss girls? 🤨
• Good evening Mitsunari!
• Dinner? 👀
• Oh, now we're talking 😍
• Mmmmmm. I do like it when he strokes my hair.
• Oh no maybe I am a cat
• Of course I can help!

• Oh he can COOK cook. He’s literally wifey.

• {It's still nice.}
• Because he likes cutting things? So much for nice
• He said: 🔪💫😁
• Ooooh! 👏👏👏👏 Very impressive 😏
• Who doesn't love a man with good hand-eye coordination?
• *Eats the mushroom*
• (…)
• *Externally* It's so good! 😄 What's your recipe?
• *Internally*👰🏻‍♀️
• You must have a beautiful heart to have such a beautiful dream.
• MITSUHIDE MASHED ALL THE FOOD TOGETHER?! WHAT ARE YOU, A BABY?! *Sniff sniff* no appreciation for all the hard work my darling Moon Moon put into it
• Masamune put much of his time and effort into preparing this for you, so you should eat it properly.
• ITADAKIMASU ~ 😁🙏
• *mouth full of food* What do you mean I'm not eating much myself? I might die tomorrow. You best believe I'm enjoying what could be my last meal.
• I TOLD Y'ALL MITSUHIDE'S THE TYPE TO SPIKE YOUR DRINK
• Mitsuhide. May I call you Asketchy? Asketchy. I thought you crossed the line when you said I would die afraid and alone, but now….now you DRUG Moon Moon? MY MOON MOON?!?! 🤬😡🤬😡 MITSUHIDE COUNT YOUR DAYS 👹👹👹
• …I would start watching your drinks as well, Mitsuhide. :)
• The fact that Mitsunari is just reading through all of this. He's just like me, for real.
• Oh he's DRUNK drunk. 😭😭😭 Come on, Moon Moon, I'll get you in bed – GET YOU TO YOUR BED
• MITSUNARI HELP!
• MITSUHIDE I SWEAR TO GOD–
• Asketchy. Thank you for teaching me how to shoot, but don't let me catch you around the castle. Don't let me catch you in the streets. Don't let me catch you alone. I will pull a Mulan and throw my slipper at you so hard that it leaves a permanent footprint on your face.
• MITSUNARI! MITSUNARI HELP ME LIFT UP MASAMUNE! PLEASE!
• MITSUHIDE YOU BASTARD! MITSUNARI DON'T LEAVE! T_T
• NOOOOOOOO
• DON'T TELL ME TO SHUT UP I CAN'T BREATHE GET OFF ME
• Oh, I know. I know, honey. Let's get you to your bed, okay? 🥰🥰
• DID HE JUST CALL ME A FUTON?! ….Ehh, this is still better than kitten.
• Heheh, he thinks I'm pretty – FOCUS, XIAO LONG, FOCUS
• (HAHAHAHA WHO'S THE KITTEN NOW? HUH???
• Awake, sleepyhead? 😏☕
• Oh, please. You're the coolest guy I've ever met.
• Well, not as cool as my dad or my lil’ brother or Jesus, but you’re a VERY close second.

Chapter 5 (6 - 10)

• I'm going to imagine he had my story made into a book with the detchōsō method.
• MOON MOON 😭😭😭😭💕💕💕💕💕 MY HEART IS YOURS
• I need to think about who I want to read the book first.
• Oh no, I can't read it myself. At least not yet. I need fresh eyes.
• My love for storytelling began when my mom would bring my younger brother and I to the library. At first, I wrote my first novel to keep me from killing myself, but as it went along, I wanted my words to bring hope to other people, too. That's how I fell in love with writing.
• Moon Moon, if you compare me to a cat ONE MORE TIME
• EEEEEEE! He called me beautiful🤭🤪
• I'm so happy I could hug you!
• YES EXACTLY NO KISSES
• I'm setting boundaries, that's what I'm doing.
• 🧍🏻‍♀️🏃🏻‍♀️🏃🏻‍♀️🏃🏻‍♀️🏃🏻‍♀️🏃🏻‍♀️🏃🏻‍♀️
• AAAAAAAA NOT AGAIN I DON'T WANT TO BE KIDNAPPED AGAIN
• You can’t tell me the MC doesn’t have at least a little PTSD from all the stuff she’s gone through at this point, particularly the kidnappings and the fire. She’s probably got a good dose of pyrophobia and paranoia, and she definitely has nightmares about being trapped in a burning building or being captured. Poor girl. CYBIRD, GIVE US A BREAK
• OH THANK GOODNESS
• Oh, it's just a hug. I love hugs!
• *Hugs him back*
• {You won.}
• CALL ME KITTEN ONE MORE TIME
• *wheezes in asthmatic* Yeah, but I can only run that fast in short bursts.
• I'M NOT IN LOVE. I JUST LIKE HIM A LOT, OKAY?
• See you later! 🤗

• I👏 AM👏 NOT👏 IN 👏LOVE 👏

• Moon Moon. My husband. My little meow meow. If they have to build a bridge to get across the river, what makes you think that jumping over it is feasible? 🤦🏻‍♀️ Unless of course, the river is short enough to jump over, in which whoever suggested that we have to build a bridge needs to go back to strategist school.
• You're welcome, Hideyoshi!
• Do I? 😀
• If there's food, I'm there, baby! Also, note that he made an effort to include me when he noticed me being left out. <3 <3
• Spill the tea, girls 👀
• He climbed up to the roof just to look at the moon?! To me that's even more adorable than playing with his tiger 😭💕💕
• WHO SAID I WAS JEALOUS? I'M JOINING IN ON THE CONVERSATION. LET'S THIRST TOGETHER. GIRLS SUPPORTING GIRLS. EVEN BETTER, IF THEY’RE INTO IT, I’LL HAVE A THREESOME WITH THEM AND MOON MOON.
• DISCLAIMER: I am very much monogamous. I will only have protected sex after marriage because I fear God, as well as STDs and anything associated with childbirth. I would never have a threesome in real life, and one should never assume that a bisexual is into threesomes just because they like girls and guys. However, if a bisexual is into threesomes, then you shouldn’t judge them either.
• Why are you so disrespectful, Ieyasu? 🙂
• Thank you, that's a high compliment, coming from an excellent cook such as yourself.
• I TOLD YOU HIDEYOSHI WOULD WARM UP TO ME
• MITSUHIDE I STILL HAVEN'T FORGIVEN YOU. SLEEP WITH BOTH EYES OPEN
• M-more important? 😳 You really think so?

Chapter 6 (1 - 5)

• First, he wants to eat my eyes, and then this cat. He's just messing with me again, isn't he?
• OHHHHH I've been WAITING for an opportunity like this 👹 Your turn to be flustered, Moon Moon. HEHEHEHEHEHEH
• {Tease him.}
• I'M NOT IN LOVE. I JUST LIKE AND RESPECT HIM A LOT
• He DOES make me happy. He's such a good friend.
• I DID NOT KISS HIM. I HUGGED HIM.
• WHAT DO YOU MEAN TASTE? FIRST MY EYES AND NOW YOU WANT TO EAT ALL OF ME?!?!
• WE ARE HUGGING WE ARE HUGGING WE ARE HUGGING
• YEAH, he's a free spirit. It's not my place to tie him down. Which is why I'm going to keep him at a distance, so I don't end up hurt.
• My book! That's right, he made my story into a book. HE'S SUCH A GOOD FRIEND 💕💕💕
• No, I think when a prey animal sees a predator, they do a full 180 and bolt out of there.
• See you tonight!
• Can I join the war council too? Can I help with the interrogation? I could be the good cop to Asketchy's bad cop.
• Thank you, Mr. Asketchy.
• I still don't trust you.
• LET'S SEE YOU SHOOT, IEYAS-EW. IF YOU'RE SO MUCH BETTER THAN ME, WHY DON'T YOU SHOW ME HOW IT'S DONE, HMMMM?
• WHO SAYS I WON'T TAKE THE SHOT?
• JUST BECAUSE I HAVE A PVSSY DOESN'T MEAN THAT I AM ONE!!
• AWWW YOU'RE INJURED? AWW YOU MIGHT DIE? IF YOU DIDN'T WANT ME TO FILL YOU WITH BULLETS, DON'T MESS WITH MY FRIENDS!
• Not only would I take the shot, Ieyas-ew, I’ll even tell you HOW I would take the shot. First, I’d take out their shoulder. Good luck shooting back at me without a shouder. If that doesn’t slow them down, I’ll take out their legs. Even better, IF THEY’RE THREATENING MY FRIENDS OR FAMILY, I’M POPPING ONE IN THEIR GROIN BECAUSE I WANT TO SEE THEM SUFFER. I'D EVEN SHOOT THEM AGAIN TO MAKE SURE THEY WERE DOWN FOR GOOD!
• Masamune, I made it!!! 😁👋
• Masamune, are you okay? You look tense.
• Oh okay. I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable. Again, thank you for the book. It means so much to me.
• If this were real life, I'd probably just listen to him and stay put, since the smell of gunpowder is clearly a trigger for him. However, as a writer I understand why I would follow him for the sake of the story.
• I'm worried about you. I don't want to leave until I'm sure you're okay.
• I'll give you some space, but I'm still going to keep an eye on you. It's just…when I'm alone, I...hurt myself, and I don't want you to hurt yourself.
• Do you want me to get you some water? I find that helps when I have panic attacks.
• I'll go change my clothes. But then you have to promise that you won't hurt yourself. I’ll be right back. Let me know if there’s any way I can help you, okay?
• AYO 🤨
• DEVOUR ME?! Moon Moon, whatever unholy thing you have in mind, it is NOT the kind of help I can give you.
• I HAVE TO WAIT TO SEE HIM AGAIN?!?! AND FOR WHAT, SO HE CAN PULL A HANNIBAL LECTER ON ME?

Special Story 2

• Girl, WHY IS HE PINNING ME TO THE WALL
• WHEN I ASKED HIM WHAT HE NEEDED, I THOUGHT HE WOULD WANT WATER OR SOMETHING, NOT THIS
• Even if I wanted to run, I couldn’t, given that you’ve PINNED ME TO THE WALL. DO I LOOK LIKE A PAINTING TO YOU??
• Aww, he’s got large canines. That’s cute!
• OW
• 😬😬😬*bites him back* See, I’m not helpless. SO DON’T DEVOUR ME
• I want to help you through your pain but not like this *sobs* Not like this 😭😭😭
• I -
• PUSH HIM OFF PUSH HIM OFF PUSH HIM OFF
• “You’re breathing. You’re still breathing.”
• BARELY!!! YOU NEARLY GAVE ME AN ASTHMA ATTACK! B!TCH!!!
• Oh honey, you don’t want to smell my breath, I don't drink enough water throughout the day. I know it's RANK
• EUGH GUNPOWDER AND SWEAT?! IT PROBABLY DOESN’T EVEN SMELL GOOD. He probably smells good though – NO DON'T THINK ABOUT THAT
• NOT HIM PUSHING HIS LEG UP BETWEEN MINE AND NOT ME LIKING IT. WHAT IS THIS SORCERY? AWAY, FOUL TEMPTER, AWAY!
• WHY IS HE BITING MY THROAT WHAT IS THIS, ZOOTOPIA!?
• IF YOU WANT TO FEEL MY HEARTBEAT, YOU CAN JUST PRESS YOUR FINGERS TO MY PULSE YOU DON’T HAVE TO DO ALL THIS
• Moon Moon, please don’t growl. My Christian virgin @ss WILL get an exorcist.
• Yes, good, you can rest your head in the crook of my neck and I can pet your hair. I like this. This is cute.
• You need to let your emotions out, but I’d prefer if you did it verbally, not physically.
• OH NOW YOU’RE LAUGHING? YOU GAVE ME AN ASTHMA ATTACK AND YOU’RE LAUGHING?!
• Oh, it's a forced laugh. I get it. He's literally me.
• Ugh, at least he apologized. MY love points have gone down by 50%, though.
• WHY DID YOU BITE ME?! DO I LOOK LIKE A RICE CAKE TO YOU?!?!
• I won't lie, I did expect biting after you gave me a predatory look within the first two seconds of meeting each other, but not on my THROAT.
• If you want to feel my warmth, just tell me and I’ll give you a hug.
• Ah I see. We’re at that stage where he’s finally going to tell me about his trauma. Good to know that he trusts me enough to be vulnerable with me, but do I trust him enough to be vulnerable with him?

• (...)
• You can move forward and still mourn your father. You can grieve without being caged by it. Don't pretend you're not bleeding when you are, or your wounds will eat you from the inside out. Trust me, I would know.
• "They're the walking wounded" is a PHENOMENAL line. CYBIRD writers, I applaud you.
• Thank you for telling me this. If you ever need to talk or hold hands or hug or a cup of water, I’m here for you.

Chapter 6 (6 - 10)

• Now I just need someone to read it!
• I told you, I need fresh eyes to get good criticism. I might be too easy on myself.
• Oh I’ll definitely read it myself one day! Hey, maybe when the war ends, you can read it, too.
• Ah yes, the haiku! Here you go, I hope you like it.
• "It's something you wrote, that's all that matters to me."
• Moon Moon. You are my everything right now. You are my malewife. You are my best friend. You are my babygirl. You are my boytoy. You are my little meow meow. I like you so so so so much
• "Am I right, Shingen?"
• "Right in the head? No."
• DAMN SHINGEN. Thanks for the new comeback.
• Nobunaga, are you sure you want to trust Mitsuhide's counsel?
• "I'll make it a clean cut, fit for a god."
• Masamune is just dropping BANGER after BANGER in terms of his trash-talking. First, "Ninja, you can go back to Echigo, as long as your head stays in Azuchi." Then, "They won't find a piece big enough to bury." Whoever wrote his lines, TEACH ME YOUR WAYS.
• I still don't trust you, Mr. Asketchy.
• "It seems dangerous." Yeah, no sh!t Sherlock. "It's starting soon." Again, no sh!t Sherlock. I might as well get Moon Moon's perspective on this, even though I already know he's low-key insane.
• {Is this fun for you?}
• Who said I wasn't prepared to kill?
• The fact that he remembered me wrestling with YoSH!Toshi 😩
• Wait, Ieyasu cares about my feelings now? I thought he didn't want me to be with Masamune. I KNEW HE WOULD WARM UP TO ME, LET'S GOOOOOO
• Not Masamune saying that he'd get over me whereas his death would change the trajectory of my life forever, warping me into a much colder, crueler self in my crusade to avenge him.
• Yojiro!! :D
• SAME Yojiro. SAME
• Ready as I'll ever be.
• "But I'm not that kind."
• MASAMUNE PLEASE 🤣🤣🤣 You are kind, though. So, so kind. Especially to your men. That's why I like you so much.
• I hope I'm wearing armor. And that I brought my knife again.
• The fact that his men feel safe enough to joke around with him. MASAMUNE, TAKE ME – I MEAN, TAKE ME TO CHURCH NO UNHOLY THOUGHTS IN MY CHRISTIAN MINECRAFT SERVER NO SIREE