Carol and Harry Go to the Cinema

It was a cold and rainy evening in Vancouver – the perfect kind of night for just staying home and nursing a cup of hot chocolate with one’s slippered feet up on a soft, cozy ottoman in front of a crackling fireplace or watching a Hallmark Christmas television show or something. But, even though the weather outside was bordering on frightful, Harry suggested to his partner-in-sublime, Carol, that perhaps they should venture out into this miserable nocturne for a hardy adventure and head to a movie at the cinema. Surprisingly, Carol thought the suggestion to be of honor and heart and thus she agreed. So then – a movie it was to be.

They checked their phones to see what was playing, but the choices seemed endless, and impossible to decide upon at that point. Finally, they agreed that it would be acceptable to simply drive to the theatre and choose a show once they arrived. It was always more of a surprise, and indeed an exercise in spontaneity, when they did things that way. They both set their cell phones down on the kitchen counter and hurried upstairs to get dressed for their night at the cinema. Within ten minutes they were back down and ready to go. On went their rain jackets and on went their rain hats and off they went out the door in a flash. Once in the car, they made their way to the nearest cinema outlet.

After spending precious time trying to find a parking spot, they reckoned at last, that it would be easier to simply park in a paid lot which would afford them a shorter walk to the movie. It was then, when Harry, and seconds later Carol, reached for a phone to make the parking lot payment. They realized they did not have a single cell phone in their possession on this evening’s excursion. After much squinting and discussing, they finally managed to navigate the protocol on the ticket dispenser in the lot, used a credit card, paid their money, took their chances and made a soggy dash for the cinema.

They reached the theatre in short order and wandered over to the menu marquee to check out the shows. After further discussion, much brow-furrowing, and more squinting, they decided on the movie about Abraham Lincoln, starring Daniel Day-Lewis. The time on the ticket indicated that the show was about to start, so they passed on drinks and popcorn and headed directly into the assigned theatre. As there were hardly any empty seats available when they purchased their tickets, they took what seemed like the only two, together, left in the auditorium. It so happened the seats were in the middle of the second row from the front. The theatre house lights were still on when they went in to find their seats so climbing over knees and feet and jackets and drinks and popcorn on the way to the middle of the row was not as difficult as it could have been had the lights been out and the movie started.

After finding their seats and after having gotten settled in them, Harry decided that, since the movie had not yet commenced, he would have time to go to the washroom and pop to the concession for a drink, a chocolate bar and some popcorn. Carol told him to go ahead and that she would simply wait for him and save his seat until he returned. Harry made his way out of the row, over knees and feet and jackets and drinks and popcorn to the side aisle and then up to the back of the theatre and out into the lobby and toward the washrooms. Carol sat back and enjoyed the trailer previews and other pre-show advertisements. Not surprisingly, the empty seat beside her – Harry’s empty seat – instantly began to attract modest interest from other late-comers to the movie.

One heavy-set gentleman squeezed his way down the row over knees and feet and jackets and popcorn and drinks, toward Carol, and on arriving in front of her, pointed at the seat beside her, and inquired, “Is that seat taken?”

Carol assured him that it was and that she was saving it for her partner who had simply gone to the washroom and would be returning at any moment. The heavy-set gentlemen muttered somewhat rudely in discontent and made his way back up the row over knees and feet and jackets and popcorn and drinks and out into the aisle to try his luck elsewhere. Carol looked at her watch and then over her shoulder behind her to see if Harry was on his way back to the empty seat.

Just then another man shouted from the aisle asking Carol, “Is that seat taken?”

Carol nodded that it was, just in time for an elderly woman to make a similar inquiry from the aisle at the opposite side of the auditorium, “Is that seat taken,” she quizzed?

After warding off that, and at least a dozen other queries, Carol looked at her watch again and wondered if Harry had maybe suffered a mishap of some sort. Perhaps an accident or worse yet, a stroke – he had been showing some signs of fatigue lately. She wondered if she should just give up her seat – both seats, and go out into the lobby and look for him. She imagined him lying on the cold tile floor in the men’s washroom, unconscious and surrounded by absent-minded teenagers and geeky-looking movie nerds – all recording the incident on their phones. Then she worried that maybe Harry had gone to the washroom and afterward, out into the lobby where he may have started a conversation with someone he’d known back in high-school and that after talking for awhile they decided to go for coffee. Or maybe it had slipped his mind why he was where he was at all, and decided to just go home. Worry turned to panic. Carol was finding it difficult to breathe. And the more impatient movie-goers she turned away from her empty seat, the more she felt like passing out from need of a drink or fresh air or Harry’s calming presence. It was getting difficult to swallow. She imagined that she may be having a stroke. And then the lights went down, signaling the beginning of the “Feature Presentation”.

“Where the hell are you Harry?” she thought, wondering if she had actually cried that out loud instead of just thinking it. She thought how easy it would be to simply contact him by phone to see where he was, but she didn’t think it would be appropriate to be making personal calls now that the movie had started. Then she realized that her phone was still sitting on the kitchen counter beside Harry’s. She almost felt relieved that she had an excuse for not having to work up the courage to use her phone in a crowded theatre.

Her body twitched a little as the phrase – “Is that seat taken?” echoed around inside her brain. She looked around again and finally decided to just slouch down into her seat and enjoy the show. As difficult as that was at first, she finally was able to relax a little and get into the plot.

Now, for just a moment, let’s zoom out of the theatre auditorium where Carol had been busy fending off would-be suitors of the empty seat beside her and where she had transitioned from impatience to worry to anger to panic and finally back to careless complacency. Instead, let’s venture out into the lobby where Harry, post-washroom break, had just finished purchasing a big bag of buttered popcorn and a jumbo soft-drink and a super-sized box of Milk Duds, all of which he would benevolently share with Carol when he returned to his seat – the much sought-after empty seat beside his partner. Not having the ticket stub in his hand to check where he was sitting, or even to check which auditorium he should be wandering back to, he thought it sufficient to simply peruse the marquee boards outside each auditorium until he found the one where the “Lincoln” movie was playing. Having done this, he stepped inside the darkened theatre and made his way to the middle seats in the second row from the front of the house. The theatre was much emptier than when he had left. He thought perhaps that the show wasn’t as wonderful as had been touted and that some of the patrons had left in a wave of dissatisfaction. When he got to his seats, Carol was not there, so he assumed that she had gone to the washroom herself and that she would be returning in a minute or two. He thought it a bit strange that there was no sign of their previous campsite. His jacket was not there. Carol’s jacket was not there. Maybe she had taken them both with her, so that they wouldn’t be stolen or looked through with no one attending to them. Anyway, he hunkered down, making himself comfortable and dug into the popcorn, candy and the soft drink. After watching the screen for some time, he thought about where Carol might be and he worried just a bit. Had she taken ill – a stroke perhaps? Was she out looking for him? Would she be angry that he had taken so long to do all his movie-going chores? He thought how easy it would be to simply contact her by phone to see where she was, but he didn’t think it would be appropriate to be making personal calls after the movie had started. Then he realized that his phone was still sitting on the kitchen counter beside Carol’s. He almost felt relieved that he had an excuse for not having to work up the courage to use his phone in a crowded theatre. His worry soon passed however, and within minutes Harry was distracted totally by what was transpiring on the screen in front of him. But, at that very moment, the screen went dark and flashed the words – “THE END”.

“What the hell?”, he wondered.

He exited the auditorium with the first throng of people – you know, the pseudo movie-goers who couldn’t be bothered to sit and watch the movie credits or the list of songs in the soundtrack – phony patrons who had no interest in Best Boys or Gaffers or Catering companies. He stood outside the auditorium doors and looked in both directions perhaps like a good child pedestrian waiting at a school cross-walk. No sign of Carol.

“What the hell?”, he wondered again.

Just then, he noticed that the theatre auditorium across the main hallway was also displaying a marquee board for the same “Lincoln” movie for which he and Carol had purchased tickets. He wondered. He felt a chill. He shivered nervously.

He scurried across and slipped inside the darkened auditorium. He waited for a few moments until his eyes became accustomed to the darkness and until the screen displayed a daytime scene. Then, in this new illumination, he scanned the room. And who do you suppose he saw, sitting there in the middle of the second row from the front, beside an empty seat? Why, none other than the girl he had brought to the show earlier that evening. He wondered if it would be in his best and safest interest to simply wait outside of the auditorium until the movie ended and then, on her exit, explain to Carol that he had ended up in the wrong theatre and that he had actually seen the ending to their movie and thus, didn’t want to spoil the movie for her by telling her about the final few scenes he had already witnessed in that different theatre – you know, the part where Lincoln actually gets shot. Or, maybe he could just slip in and quietly sit beside her and act like nothing unusual had happened. On further scrutiny, she did appear to be enjoying the show, so obviously she was not all that worried about his whereabouts. And, he still had some popcorn and candy left to share with her, which would also serve to smooth what could be rough waters. So, it seemed like a no-brainer. He decided on the latter option.

Balancing his popcorn and candy and soda, he walked cautiously down to the second row from the front of the house and clamored over knees and feet and jackets and drinks and popcorn until he got to the empty seat beside Carol, and then just before he was to quietly sink into that very seat, he turned his head downward to his partner, just as she turned hers upward to him, and with all due respect and courtesy he asked with some humor and a little trepidation, “Is that seat taken?”

THE END