Adventure to Sea

A revisit for "Talk Like a Pirate Day":

~What started out as a relaxing trip on an ocean voyage...

almost caused me pants to smell of soilage.

~As I arose from my berth, my head did a whacker,

and Polly, please give that darn yacking bird a salt cracker!

~The blues and oranges of his proud plumed hackle

bobbed up and down as he let out one hellacious shrill cackle.

~Before me a one-legged man, with one "almost a hand" on his huckle,

stood waist forward...waving a cutlass and adorned a brass buckle!

~He cussed and spatted and spit and growled that "he" was the Captain

then ordered his mates to grab me, shackle me, and put me to batten.

~This peg-legged, hooked, and one-eyed old Jack did glint

as his pockets did jingle with doubloons yet to be spent.

~He wolfed down some brack followed by a scuttlebutt of ale

and then let out a belch straight from the fiery pit of hell!

~Handsome Jack Sparrow he most definitely was not...

his dirty black eyepatch and teeth smelled of rot!

~As I peered around the best that I could in considering my fate,

the chains I preferred to the proverbial plank which I'd hate.

~I decided to be settled in me situation and not baulk in me distress,

because I have a dreadful fear of sharks, I must secretly confess!

~The Captain's wackers were quite busy from the bow to the stern,

they were too afraid to be any type of sad slugs or slackers he'd burn.

~No complaints were uttered from me mouth, but me nose certainly did;

from the deck there were shuckers of whelks and choppers of squid!

~Some of his hearties were making whips of kurbashes...

I'm sure they weren't meant for mere rashes but instead, deep lashes!

~Others made haste shaping dough into discs...

those kulchas sure would taste good with some bisque!

~But just then I noticed countless small chukars in cages...

sweet, cooing birds whose fates against my soul rages!

~A very loud voice from the Crow's Nest gave a big holler...

"Captain, I spy black clouds and we're doomed for a squall-or!!!"

~"YO HO HO" screamed back Old Sea-Dog, & with his becks and his calls,

"Batten down hatches and caulk those seams...with the wind we do haul!

~Long story, short...the batten and caulk, it did not at all matter...

the wind tossed our ship like the worst quirks of Mad Hatter!

~Me chains they released, to save me limbs for me torso,

grateful to be free from me misery, yet one more to harrow.

~There was a large crack and then a boom, what a wreck!

First no sail, then no bow, no stern, neither helm, nor a deck...

~ Luckily, I floated off to some distant, unknown shore

on a splintered bulk of wood, but me head was bad sore!

~Me feet were entangled with green snaky wrack

Oh, how I hated that and thought I might crack!

~ Beholden for the backrush that moved that slimy mess...

and where I'd go from here was only mine and yours to guess!

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Footnote: When I was a child and we lived in the Canary Islands, we travelled on a small ship from one island to another. I remember becoming so ill with seasickness and the round windows in our cabin were washing up green slimy, moving kelp, making me even more nauseous. This is why I would never do a cruise. Sorry Norwegian, thanks, but no thanks...

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Definitions from Oxford (in order of bolden words, which were from my 12 letter Word to unscramble into these words):

1. whacker: a person or thing that strikes something forcefully

2. hackle: long narrow feathers on the neck of a bird

3. huckle: hip

4. buckle: a flat, typically rectangular frame with a hinged pin, used for joining the ends of a belt or strap

5. shackle: a pair of fetters connected together by a chain, used to fasten a prisoner's wrists or ankles together

6. brack: cake or bun containing dry fruit

7. belch: emit gas noisily from the stomach through the mouth

8. black: the very darkest color owing to the absence of or complete absorption of light

9. baulk: be unwilling to do something

10. wackers: friends or pals

11. shuckers: those who shuck clams, oysters, (and whelks in this case.)

12. whelks: sea snails with hard shells and soft bodies

13. kurbashes: whips made from rhino skin

14. kulchas: disc shaped bread

15. chukars: partridges or pigeons

16. becks: a gesture such as a nod

17. caulk: material used to seal seams against leakage (Pirates pounded and compressed caulking material (usually “oakum,” which was tarred hemp cordage) into the seam.

18. wreck: destruction of a ship

19. wrack: seaweed on the shore

20. backrush: return of water seaward after a wave

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References:

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I'd like to thank Heather Hubler and her great sense of creativity in choosing this challenge! I truly enjoyed participating in her idea, because I got to use my love of research discovering the life of pirates, learned many new word meanings, and had so much fun with this "swashbuckling" endeavor! However, I went a bit crazy and have way too many words to participate in her challenge (with a limit of 150 words!) But I look forward to your submissions, just the same...Check the challenge out: