WHERE DO WE BELONG?

WOMEN WHO INSPIRE: WHERE DO WE BELONG?

We belong to beauty and we are in the service of it. I am reminded of this when I am around Anna-Alexia Basile simply because of our relationship. For me, belonging and inspiration are inextricably linked.

Anna is an incredible artist and photographer. Her work alone is enough to inspire the world! It’s both feminine and strong, enchanting, vibrant and centered around her enamoration with color. She’s obsessed with well defined shadows, reflections and monochromatic spaces. Her background in interior design, architecture, women’s studies and gender research inform the way she sees the world and moves through it. She has a Masters in fashion marketing and this makes perfect sense to those who know her. Her style is remarkable, she is wildly talented, her point of view is provocative and she is my best friend.

We met on location in San Francisco. Anna was shooting for Refinery29 and I was a subject, casted for a street style article that our mutual friend was writing. This was 5 years ago.

For the first couple years of our friendship, we hung out as friends getting to know each other do— the occasional yoga or Soul Cycle class, brunch with mutual friends and random park parties. I knew I liked her and wanted to be friends but as Anna always says “the best things happen when you aren’t really looking.”

I wasn’t in need of a best friend, or a creative partner or even someone to travel with. I truly felt very satisfied with how life was unfolding. But now a future without frequent daily phone calls, on-demand hysterical laughter, inside jokes to last us a lifetime, the guess-what-I-am-eating-on-the-phone game, endless inspiration, an abundance of creative projects to discuss and execute, real accountability with producing good work, advocacy for earning our worth, being included in a meaningful ways, travel adventures that are otherworldly and the simple knowing that time spent together is always better than not, feels devastatingly empty and boring.

My life is more beautiful now with her. And I belong to beauty.

I knew it felt like belonging when we went on our first (of many) international trips. We were in Mexico. When Anna called me to see if I would assist her on a shoot for a huge client, I couldn’t believe it. The opportunity was something I only had dreamed of; it was a full body yes.

I found belonging in being a part of her envisioned creative team and it felt important to be considered and included in the work. And to my surprise and utter amazement, this work trip was so much more than work.

Assisting her photo shoot was the most magical 4 days in paradise, one where I overcame my deep rooted fear of open water. I truly saw life differently after our adventure. This experience expanded me in so many ways— professionally, personally, emotionally, spiritually. It expanded what I believed I was worthy of in my pursuit of meaningful work, achieving work-life balance and friendship.

On this trip Anna encouraged me to go into the ocean. I told her I would stay on the sand and wait for her, but she pushed me to experience the ocean. It was beautiful and expansive but I was reluctant, as I have had 3 near drowning experiences, despite being a decent swimmer. After only getting my feet wet on the shore, she explained to me that open water swimming is different from other water. I grew up with a pool on a lake, so I never understood this. She explained how to approach ocean swimming differently and offered to go in with me. Lovingly, she waited for the right moment in the wave breaks, saying “now!” at the perfect time, held my hand and we moved past the rough zone together. We were in there for hours. Swimming in the warmest, pinkest ocean waters for what felt like an eternity and a second all at once. I’ll never forget the way the peachy pink sky reflected off the surface of the water, engulfing us in a world of bright and promising hues. This is one of my favorite memories of all time. We felt buoyant.

Buoyancy— the way we have floated in each other’s lives since has somehow felt both complete and incomplete. Complete in the sense that I have arrived and feel safe and certain, and incomplete because I know that the future is fucking endless. There is so much art to create together, beauty to live, places to go and experiences to belong to.

Mexico with Anna offered me an opportunity to heal a past trauma through her invitation to simply belong to the ocean. My eyes were opened to the beauty of trusting and my beliefs about work and working relationships shifted dramatically as I moved from feeling trusted to profoundly trusting. Traveling internationally for a photo shoot, yes, was incredible. But so was dancing under the moon, laying out in the sand staring at the perfect ocean, eating our weight in guacamole, pizza and ice-cream and finding depth in the shared experience of growing together.

In Cuba, I found a different belonging. We traveled there a couple months after Mexico for a personal adventure, on a whim—like Anna often did. It was that sort of happenstance decision where I didn’t have a ton of time to overthink it. I got a call from Anna who was in an excited spell of passion, recognizable now as a drop-everything-and-purchase-these-plane-tickets urgency. She explained that tickets were “less than $300...round trip...TO CUBA!!” It almost seemed too good to be true so I told her I “needed to think about it,” which I’ve now learned that I don’t need to do anymore, and that I can just trust her. Cuba was incredibly beautiful, we had an extraordinary time and I felt transformed once again by the magic that ensued from being wrapped up in her adventures.

The most extraordinary thing that happened was a profound realization that emerged from a racial incident. We were leaving a famously cool Cuban rooftop bar and on our way out, someone made a racist statement to me. It was made deliberately to “put me in my place,” to shame me, to embarrass and dehumanize me. Before I could react (or shrink in shock and humiliation), Anna courageously stood in front of me and in between us and confronted this hateful person— expressing clearly and articulately her disgust for hate and love for me. And where I might have felt an overwhelming sense of othering, I found myself belonging to beauty once again.

One year later, I received another drop-everything-and-purchase-this-plane-ticket-now phone call from Anna. This time it was for Mexico City, and it was well worth it. It was there that Anna had the idea to take a huge risk, which involved traveling to a location to make work that was difficult and perhaps even slightly dangerous to get to. The Torres de Satélite ("Satellite Towers") are located in Ciudad Satélite, in the northern part of Naucalpan, Mexico. It is one of the country's first urban sculptures of great dimensions. Its planning started in 1957 with the ideas of renowned Mexican architect Luis Barragán (Anna’s favorite), painter Jesús Reyes Ferreira and sculptor Mathias Goeritz. The sculptures essentially act as a freeway median, dividing 10 lanes of traffic going one direction. Waiting and calculating the right moment for the cars to break was not an easy task and we debated whether or not to even do it. Rather, I was reluctant and Anna had a vision and believed in something beautiful. So we did it. We waited and waited and then at the right moment, Anna grabbed my hand exclaiming “now!” and we ran across together, barely making it ahead of the speeding cars.

And while there was no one on the concrete island (except me and Anna), we made gorgeous photos and a beautiful dance film there. This was meaningful to me for many reasons. We had a lot of visibility from an unexpecting audience and again, I was expanded in my belief about myself and my work. I was reminded how I love the nuances of unanticipated beauty and my love for creating site-specific work. It was here that I saw a new way to contextualize myself as an artist in space— belonging to and alongside beauty.

Our travels have continued, creating other incredible adventures for the books. A trip to Spain with Anna revealed again the meaning of trust in her, the meaning of her vision, the pursuit of art. A trip to Morocco tested our edges and our faith. Our time in Marfa and White Sands birthed some of our most moving work together. I’ve been to some of the most incredible places in the world with Anna, and I have seen and experienced them fully in service to art.

IN THE END ALL COLLABORATIONS ARE LOVE STORIES.

― TWYLA THARP

This relationship has shown me many invaluable truths. One that will never leave me, is that when we are present (meaning when we show up for each other), we authentically and radically have access to a more creative, more honest and, therefore, more powerful life. It is here that we are supported and are encouraged to be better and do better. Aspects of this relationship have transformed and healed the way I relate to myself, to others, my work and society at large.

It has become so clear to me that this is the greatest gift I could ask for in this lifetime. Anna is the most creative person I know— generous, thoughtful, inclusive, hard working, virtuous and fucking hilarious. There are simply not enough words to express this truth in its entirety.

When being around someone who I simply trust and love is inspiration enough, I am propelled in the direction of my greatest power and highest expression of myself. This is timeless. As a friend, as an artist, as a human being, it feels endless. I am forever inspired. More than a creative partner, more than a travel companion, more than a best friend— this truly feels like belonging.