What Is Love?

Love is a word we've all heard. It’s in every song, movie, and conversation about life’s most meaningful moments. But, seriously, what is it? Is it a verb or a noun? Is it something we do or something we feel? Some call it a universal truth, while others treat it as an ideal. Some even call it a neurological phenomenon, reducing it to a surge of chemicals in the brain. But, no matter what, the more we try to define love, the more it slips away, leaving us with only comparisons.

Some claim love is all-encompassing: it "conquers all," "it's all you need," or "it's all there is." But these sayings only tell us that love is important—more important than anything else. Is that true, though? Sure, love matters more than a turkey sandwich, but does it matter more than a roof over your head, your sanity, or maybe the world’s best turkey sandwich? The problem here is that we’re ranking love rather than defining it.

And another thing: we often try to define love while we’re *in* it or *out* of it. Would you trust someone who just won the lottery to explain money to you? How about asking someone being attacked by a bear to define "bear"? These emotions cloud our thinking, making love as hard to explain as the sensation of being hit by lightning while you’re actually being hit by lightning. And yet, that’s where the beauty of love lies—right in its messiness and mystery.

### Love as a Feeling

So, what if love is just a feeling? A special, magical emotion like no other. Some might say it’s a feeling for someone that you’ve never felt before, something unique that overtakes your life. But here’s the catch: feelings are fleeting. We’ve all been there—sometimes you love someone deeply, and other times you feel frustrated with that same person. Love doesn’t stay still; it evolves, shifts, and even conflicts with other emotions.

What’s more, your love for someone is influenced by the relationships you already have. Your family plays a big role in shaping how you love a partner. Your love for a partner may mirror—or completely clash with—the love you feel for your parents or siblings. And then there are the tricky contradictions: you can love someone and hate them at the same time, because love is not just one thing. It’s fluid, unpredictable, and it affects all parts of your life.

### Love as a Set of Behaviors

But maybe love isn’t just a feeling—it’s also a set of actions. Holding hands, kissing, hugging, going on dates, getting married, starting a family, or even just having sex. These are all behaviors we associate with love. But like feelings, these behaviors are subjective and shaped by culture. Not everyone wants to get married or have children. In some cultures, people don’t even date in the way we think of dating in the West. And some people simply aren’t into public displays of affection, like kissing in front of a crowd. So, is love really about what you do, or is it something deeper than that?

### Love as Biology

Maybe love is just a trick biology plays on us. It could be that love is all about brain chemicals. When you fall for someone, your brain lights up, releasing chemicals that make you feel good. Some scientists even compare it to an addiction. In this view, love is like being hooked on a drug—you crave the person because your body is wired to seek them out. You want more of them, and you feel withdrawals when they’re gone. But if love is just a chemical reaction, why do some people stay "addicted" to each other for life, while others break the bond over time?

There’s also an evolutionary argument. Love could be our DNA’s way of making sure we reproduce. Nature pushes us to fall for someone, mate, and keep the human species going. It’s not just humans, either. Animals have their own mating behaviors, and we’re no different. Love might just be a survival strategy, but does that really explain the depth and complexity of our emotions?

### Love as a Social Construct

Maybe love isn’t real at all. Maybe it’s just a social construct—a concept that society created, and we all agree to play along with. But just because something is constructed doesn’t mean it’s fake. Love is built from real-life experiences: emotions, brain chemistry, cultural norms, and personal history. And each person’s love is different because no two people are the same. What love means to you might be completely different from what it means to someone else. That’s why communication is so important in relationships—without it, love becomes misunderstood, and the relationship falters.

### The Conclusion? Love is Under Construction

So, if we can’t define love in one simple way, maybe that’s a good thing. Maybe the fact that love is always up for interpretation means we’re still creating it, still shaping what it means in our lives. It’s a feeling, an action, a mystery, a biological impulse, and a social idea all rolled into one. And perhaps the most beautiful part of love is that it’s never fully figured out. Love is something we are all still building, together.