Victoria Redbard.

“Hell yeah, I’m keen for yoga!”

She always tells me the first words I said to her were so eagre & excited, ready for anything.

She curls an eyebrow at me, like my response was far too excited.

My friend, who organised the event in the park for World Vegan Day had already approached me & said the yoga instructor is new to the community, & that I should help rustle up some people to do yoga with her soon.

Simple, gather the energy, create momentum by gathering a few excited people, the rest follow.

So there’s a group of us stretching & flowing on the grass… I hadn’t realised how beautiful she was until she started moving.

She held the whole group so easily. Her sweet British accent dropping her tee’s. Not fully pronouncing any ‘ing’ word. She had this inner- rebel energy that doesn’t care or have time for any of society’s dogmatic ways. So she paves her own path.

Something mystical about that rebellious sparkle in her eyes, plus that accent, makes me think of fairy tales & myths.

I want to see her again.

----------------------------

Months later we’re shocked that a relationship can feel so easy.

She tells me her Australian visa is running out.

“Will you travel the world with me?” She asks. “We could go backpacking for a year. We’ll see my family back in England, do some random countries, then do a big trip around Central & South America. I want to do tantra & sexual embodiment workshops in London, a 10 day silent meditation in Panama, learn sexological bodywork training in Brazil, & do plant medicine in the jungle. Shall we go?”

“Hell yeah, I want to travel the world with you.”

She gives me that same wry eyebrow at my eagerness that she loves so much.

In our travels we hear stories in Iceland about how the vikings landed, & everyone in the country can trace their lineage back through the annals to those first Norse settlers.

We learn breathwork at the top of Machu Picchu in Peru. Looking down on the old city from Huana Picchu & feeling on top of the world.

Diving into tantric immersions in Brazil, & learning to spread erotic energy through our bodies.

Years later, more than a dozen countries visited, we're hosting workshops together to teach people how to communicate in relationships, & create the exact dynamic that people want in the way they relate, & how to expand in sexual pleasure.

I was hosting circles for men.

Vic was hosting circles for women.

I was getting men to express their emotions.

She was getting women to self-pleasure, & tap into their erotic pleasure-filled expression.

I'd get home from circle & there'd be blissed-up, orgasmic women leaving the house. Women I'd witnessed as barely capable to look a man in the eye a few weeks ago, now glowing while greeting me, like a divine, erotic mother that gave birth to all of humanity.

I picture those ancient statues of the mother Goddess, the earliest known statues, in the shape of a woman with beautiful wide hips, & round belly & full breasts. Even if the woman wasn’t shaped like this, somehow this image came to mind. Simultaneously intimidating & arousing to my body.

As I cast my mind back, I recall the women leaving the house with an other-worldly glow, an ancient sparkle in their eyes, & butterflies playing around their feet.

“We’re doing the same work, Danny.” She’d say to me.

“When women grow up, we’re taught, ‘Don’t show too much skin, what will people say about you? Don’t be seen with too many guys, people will call you a slut. Don’t be seen as being too keen for sex, a guy will never commit to you.’ The wound, the pain point, becomes around expression of sexuality…”

“Right, so how are we doing the same work?”

“Right,” She says, “The pain-point for you guys. Imagine you’re a little boy & you’re crying in front of your dad & your cousins, what does he say?”

He says, “Come on, don’t cry, be a big boy.” I say.

“Right,” She responds, “So, you’re taught that it’s bad to express emotion, that’s what girls do, you don’t want to be a girl, do you? You don’t want to be a weak, emotional cry-baby? So don’t cry, little boy. In fact, don’t be sad at all publicly, don’t let anyone ever see you upset or emotional. A wound evolves around emotional expression.”

“So, the liberation for women’s pain is through sexual expression. The liberation for men’s pain is through emotional expression. What we’re doing every time we create these spaces is re-wiring all the old conditioning. All the beliefs that hold them back. When all that’s gone, they can finally be open to new possibilities.”

Her idea, was to host both men & women in the same circle. To create a community that could express emotionally, & learn how to create & communicate their most heavenly relationship style. It doesn’t matter who people love. What people really need is the permission & frameworks to not follow society.

Her cocky little British accent drops all her tees, especially when she’s on a rant. I’d be hooked on her words, & in for the plan before it even began.

“Danny, here’s what we’re gonna do.

Get your flute & grab the crew.

Give them the new lens to see through,

Show them the love we know is true…

& by next year, they’ll drop the fear,

& we’ll have them all in love.

No need to shove, dear stars above,

We fit this purpose like a glove.

We’ll show up here, be loud & clear.

Loudest pair in this hemisphere.

Teach them how to formulate,

The ideal way they want to relate

Heavenly lovers, we’ll create.

Let’s open up that flood-gate…

You’re on board, Danny. I know you are.

You’ve backed me every day thus far.

Peas in a pod, you & me are.

Little bit strange, a tad bizarre.

I wouldn’t change you & me for nuffink.”

---------------------------------------------------

“Hell yeah, I’m with you, darlin’. "

The purpose was to create a sexually & emotionally free community.

Normal people out in the world, from Brisbane to the Gold Coast to Byron Bay, that have the framework to confidently approach new relationships. We gave them the tools so that they’re capable of being vulnerable in their emotions, & hold point on themselves as the most important person in their lives.

Vic is a master of frameworks. She’d share the information, then I’d tell a story of how we apply it in our relationship.

Everyone has trauma. The question is, can we be centered while our partner is triggered in their trauma, & hold point for them to go through their healing process, no matter how ugly it gets.

They’re merely reacting from a fear state, it doesn’t mean that we have to go into a fear state with them, or react to their outbursts & projections.

She’s known as Victoria Redbard, the Tantric Witch. Creator of sexually embodied leaders. Creatrix of connection to life's true extent of pleasure.