Valid Complaining vs Being a Kyle/Karen- A Field Guide

We've all seen them — the people who turn every minor inconvenience into Shakespearean tragedy. 

We roll our eyes and mutter, “Get over it,” as they whine about waiting for their fast food order or complaining about why the coffee shop is out of oat milk that day.

On the other hand, some people have some valid reasons to complain:

• In Ohio, a factory worker was forced to work 60-hour weeks then denied overtime pay.
• A retiree in New York was scammed out of $5,000 in 2023 by a fake charity.
• A reporter in Louisiana was terminated in 2024 after she uncovered municipal government corruption.
• A Spanish-speaking immigrant in Texas was misdiagnosed with a minor condition because the hospital lacked interpreters, which lead to a delayed cancer diagnosis.

These are not complaints — they're five-alarm injustices worthy of front page exposes.

Now where exactly is the line between an injustice and a Karen/Kyle self entitled complaining? Let's break it down.

The Entry Price to a Complaint

On Google reviews, a user wrote a bad review about my regular Starbucks barista, which revolved around their opinion that “she never smiles”. Does this user think that a $5 latte entitles them to a Broadway-level performance of friendship? The barista has been making lattes since 6 AM for near minimum wage while dealing with a line of stressed out customers. Cut her a break.

If this person had spent $200 eating diner at a Michelin-starred restaurant, I would have sympathized with their frustration. A cranky waiter would ruin the vibe of a fine dining experience they paid for.

Expectations must be proportionate to the cost.

Quick test: Is it okay to lose to complain over a missing lemon wedge? 

A) Yes, it's a travesty. 

B) No, chill out.

% of Damage

Someone buys a dozen eggs from Shop n Save, cracks them open, and discover they're all spoiled. That's a real injustice: they paid for a basic necessity, and now you're out $3 and tomorrow's breakfast. A 100% loss. The supermarket failed, and anger feels righteous. We rally behind them, shaking our fists at the injustice of Big Supermarket's flagrant mishandling of the egg supply chain.

Now imagine, your new phone arrives with a pixel that's slightly off-color. Do you call accept it, or declare war on the manufacturer? You're annoying — fair enough — but it's probably just a normal flaw, not a conspiracy.

Now imagine a billionaire who owns three yachts and a pet tiger complaining about a microscopic scratch on their Ferrari. It becomes their personal Waterloo, and they're on the phone with their lawyer and the press, demanding compensation. I'd hate them. Why? Because the stakes for them doesn't match their meltdown. 

Complainers lose sympathy when their reaction outweighs the damage.

“Nothing's perfect” is a truism. Nothing should be completely imperfect, either.

List of Completely Appropriate Responses:

• My ShopRite eggs were rotten: ✅ Righteous fury. Call the FDA. Burn the store down.
• My iPhone has an off colored pixel: 😐Mild annoyance. Contact customer service.
• My Ferrari has a tiny scratch: 🙄Silent acceptance. Hope it's a key mark from a struggling artist.

Service Workers are People Too

Other people will react to how gracefully you deal with others. They probably have just as many problems in their life as whatever you are dealing with at the moment.

Valid Injustice: “I've asked politely 3 times, but my landlord won't fix the broken water heater.”

Complainer Logic: “My landlord DISRESPECTED ME when I demanded he fix the water heater at 2 AM.”

Fighting Injustice or Just Annoying

Next time you're ready to rage over a lukewarm latte, ask yourself: Is this an injustice, or am I just channeling my inner Karen?

✅ Valid: Health hazards, discrimination, wage theft, the public good.

❌ Complainer: “They forgot the lemon wedge,” “The Wi-Fi password was too long,” “My private jet's champagne wasn't chilled enough.” 

What do you think — where's your line between a valid grievance and a pointless rant? And, what's the pettiest complaint you've ever heard? Share in the comments.

Final Exam

What's your take on the following complainers collected from AITA stories on Reddit:

1. One user posted about refusing to pay at a fancy restaurant after being served tiny portions listed as entrées. He ordered a $26 bison steak and his girlfriend got an $18 pasta dish, but both were shocked by the small servings — barely a snack, they argued. When the waiter returned, they declared they wouldn't pay, citing false advertising, and the manager eventually let them leave without payment after a confrontation.
2. A 25-year-old woman and her boyfriend endured constant chatter behind them at an 8 PM showing with about 15 other people. After asking them to quiet down failed, she snapped, “STFU,” prompting glares but silence.
3. A young woman asked if she was wrong for being upset that their fiancé donated sperm to his brother without discussing it first. The fiancé's brother had fertility issues, and the donation led to a child, but the user felt betrayed by the secrecy.
4. A woman who complained about her husband's snoring keeping her awake during a camping trip. She demanded he sleep in the car, but he refused, citing the cold and discomfort. Frustrated, she left the tent to sleep elsewhere, and was upset with her husband for the rest of the trip.
5. A shopper complained about a cashier taking too long to bag groceries — about two minutes extra due to a chat with another customer — and rudely called them out for not doing their job well.