Turn the Page.

Eve walked along the quiet, secluded path just as she had on the 18th of every month for the past year. She always chose the long, windy trail surrounded by overgrown trees and scattered leaves rather than the manicured sidewalk from the parking lot. For a few brief minutes, she could concentrate on the trail rather than on her destination.

Eve’s feet felt like cement blocks and her whole chest began to hurt as she got closer to the small grave. The pain in her feet, her heart, her whole body was more than she could handle most days, but it never stopped her from visiting Jimmy on the anniversary of the accident. Her eyes welled with tears as she forced herself to look at the headstone.

James Edward Collier

Loving Son and Brother

1998-2019

The headstone didn’t say Loving Husband and Father, Best Friend, or Center of Eve’s Universe. The chance for those memories was stolen by the man who plowed into Jimmy’s car at 4:06 p.m. on a Friday one year ago today. Mercifully, Jimmy was killed instantly. Eve, on the other, has been in constant pain from losing Jimmy. She was permanently stuck between anger and grief; she could not move forward. She felt heartbroken. Empty. Shattered.

Thinking about Jimmy always left her paralyzed with sadness. Some days she would lie next to his grave and cry for hours. The past year had been a blur of crying and sleeping. Her visits to see Jimmy broke up her otherwise predictably pathetic routine.

Today, as Eve sat down next to Jimmy’s grave, she noticed a small black book resting against the headstone. Eve picked up the black book and flipped it open. Tucked inside the cover was a small note.

Eve,

This is Jimmy’s journal. He started it sophomore year in his English Lit class. Apparently, Jimmy survived English Lit by writing about you. The day you met. Your first date. His undying love for you. Jimmy would have wanted you to have this and I am sorry I didn’t give it to you sooner.

Reading his journal gave me comfort. I hope it will do the same for you. Jimmy would hate seeing you like this. Especially, the days you spend crying on the couch and the week you wouldn’t eat or bathe. Yes, your parents told me. And Jimmy wouldn’t like it. Not one bit.

You may also know that Jimmy had a bank account he labeled the House Fund. I gave your mom the House Fund to deposit into your account this morning - $20,000. Use the money to follow your dreams. Jimmy would expect nothing less from you. He would want you to have the world and so do we. Thank you for giving my son a lifetime of love and happiness.

Always,

Karen Collier

Eve turned to the first page of Jimmy’s journal. Jimmy’s handwriting. Jimmy’s words. She stared at the pages without reading. Tears streamed down her face and her chest heaved. After what felt like hours, she took a long, deep breath and began to read.

August 17, 2017

Well, it happened. I met the girl I am going to marry. Let’s just hope she agrees or that would be weird. I guess I had better ask her on a date first. And maybe find out her last name. She better like beer or the wedding is off.

Eve smiled as she remembered that day. August 17, 2017, the first day of their sophomore year. Eve was volunteering at the orientation booth for her sorority when Jimmy walked by. He was the cutest guy she had ever seen- piercing blue eyes, tanned face, and a smile that lit up the campus. When Jimmy saw her, he stopped abruptly and moved toward the table. Jimmy announced he would like to sign up for the sorority and insisted on getting more information. Eve’s protests about the sorority being for females fell on deaf ears. Jimmy didn’t give in until he triumphantly left the table with the sorority orientation folder and Eve’s phone number.

From their first day until their last day together, they just fit. They talked about buying a house, getting married, traveling, and raising kids together. They talked about honeymoon destinations and their kids’ names. They talked about everything … well, everything, except Jimmy dying in a car accident the day before his brother’s wedding.

Eve steadied herself for the crushing pain she felt every time she thought or heard those words, those devastatingly permanent words – “Jimmy died.” But, today, instead of being enveloped in her grief, something miraculous happened. She looked at the journal, smiled, and turned the page.