TRIAL, ERROR, AND DEDICATION

I am going to start off saying I know it is time to start writing a book. I have a few reasons and the most poor excuses why I haven’t started writing a book. We can chat about reason one because it will be the longest reason and the worst excuse, I have written 2 books but one I never submitted and one didn’t get published. The first book that I had written , I was 18 and had no real friends, just a party head, and I was with the wrong crowd. The 2nd book was denied by a publisher, I can say right now my publisher doesn’t even share my stories on social media or promote them. I was also asked in my 2nd book, “what makes beating cancer so exciting?” That is where the story “Beating Cancer Gives You Superpowers” came from. I can’t take criticism I know that but seriously how are you a publisher and you ask a stupid ass question like that? I know I sound angry but this is why there hasn’t been writing. Trust me I enjoy writing. The part I hate is people taking the enjoyment out of things because you feel as if someone's expression of life isn’t pleasing to people. We now live in a world where expressing yourself is getting naked on camera with your significant other and selling yourselves is the stuff worth publishing and promoting. Other people have their niches but beating cancer and writing about it is mine but I guess I had to grow into it.

Let’s move on to reason two before I have high blood pressure, this reason is poor because it leads me to error. A human's biggest mistake is bad influence and friends! If I wanted to dedicate myself to what I love doing and achieve my biggest goals in life, why am I trying to party everywhere and hangout with people who don’t even acknowledge me? Actually I still don’t even get acknowledged unless the topic of COVID,RACIAL ISSUES, or SOCIAL MEDIA is involved. This was the hardest lesson to learn, which is don’t follow the crowd which is really difficult when now everything needs a follow,like,poke,share, etc. Then there are hormones and emotions that led me to great social skills, I don’t know how. I just know that it made me who I am today, lonely Darius with a cherry as his last name.

I am going to finish this on reason three, I would write more but I should save that for the book I need to write I guess. My dedication to Motorsports and cars, I am sure you were expecting some sex or drug addiction. No I am not that bad I mean I have my shots of tequila but that's because people think drinking is bad but I have too much dedication for racing to live that life. Number one rule: cars before anything productive, I need a visual before I just start doing jobs and worrying about why I am cleaning diarrhea off of a hotel toilet in a snowstorm. I did that because I was trying to save up money to move out of Virginia to start my journey, don’t worry I quit the next day once it was cleared to drive home. The 3rd book was already starting to form again but I stopped because I started to realize I haven’t seen any of my dream cars in person. I have seen a few but not like I do now and the interaction I have with them. An artist has to have a visual before the painting, don’t ask me what inspired me to write when you see it on the road everyday. These are poor excuses but what makes up for it is my dedication to my passion because people think I give up when I am actually just adding to the journey and book. From here on out everyone I meet are just fans and followers I guess, if you're my friend we are cruising in racecars or we racing. I will go out by myself and do activities for normal people because those same normal people don’t think about cars like I do. Those 3 reasons are Trial,Error And Dedication. I am still learning from them so don’t feel bad, just feel motivated.