The Little Black Book of Bribes

Beep beep beep. Simon tapped on his phone until his alarm went off. It was 8 am, and today he was going with his best friend, Barbara, to pick up their cap and gowns for their high school graduation. As he got ready, he could hear his mom coming through the door. She had just got home from her second job, and she was speaking loudly on the phone. "Yes, yes, I know it's a little late, oh is that so? Can I go on a payment plan?"

Simon was just about to enter the next chapter of his life; college. And he had gotten into his Dad's alma- mater Howard University right along with his best friend Barbara, Barb for short. They were so excited. His mom was beaming when he got the acceptance letter. But how could he leave his mom now at a time like this?

His mom worked at a women's clinic as a receptionist by day and a waitress at the nearby diner by night. Ever since his Dad passed away suddenly last summer, his mom had to work 2 jobs to make ends meet, and it had been pretty rough on them.

One day he came home from school and told her that he decided that he wouldn't go to college right away, he would stay home to work and help her pay off her debts and get back on her feet, but she wouldn't hear of it.

"Listen, it's not easy right now for either of us, but I am your mother! You don't take care of me! I take care of you. Your only job is for you to keep getting those straight A's in school. I am so proud of the man you're becoming" she smiled, touching his face gently. "Now, don't ever come in here talking that mess again!"

He tried to pick up the slack in other ways as much as he could. He would tutor younger kids and buy groceries. He made sure the house was clean, and every Wednesday and Friday, he would take out the trash. But that barely seemed to help, and things only got worst. His mom was constantly on the phone with debt collectors. Things seemed to be spiraling out of control.

She was still on the phone as he tried to creep past the kitchen and out the door. "Simon! Is that you? Hold on, hold on. I'll be home early today for once. Be home so we can have dinner together."

"Okay, Mom," he replied, walking over to her at the kitchen table, giving her a kiss on the cheek before heading out the door.

As usual, the elevator was broken, so he went right for the nearest staircase down 4 flights; just as he was about to open the door to exit to the first floor, he noticed a little black book lying on the ground in the corner. He picked it up "moleskin" he read on the back. It seems a bit overstuffed. He released the band that was holding it together and out fell a wad of money. He picked up the cash along with the book, quickly shoving it into his jacket pocket when he heard a door open and kids running down the stairs.

Simon quickly exited the building and walked out onto Main Street. He couldn't go back upstairs to check out what he found, and he certainly couldn't pull it out right there. He lived in the city on a busy road, so there were countless people outside at any given time. Today the usuals were hanging around; Old lady May, sat in a lawn chair outside of her building a few doors down, talking to everybody who passed by. People were always selling things on little folding tables in the streets; one man was still out there with incense, and another lady sold hand-knit scarves and hats. Simon waves and smiled and started walking straight to Barbara's house, which was 3 blocks away, and rang the bell.

"Hey! You're on time, shocker!" Barbra smiled, teasing him. "Let me get my jacket. Oh my gosh, I just can't wait to graduate and move out! It s about time, shoot! We're going to have so much fun on campus! I looked up homecoming on YouChannel. Omg, it's going to be freaking amazing! All of the bands, the clubs..."

"Uh, hold that thought- I have to go to the bathroom first," said Simon cutting her off before she went on any longer. "Sure, come on in. You know where it is," Barbara replied, motioning down the hall.

Simon went into the bathroom and immediately began taking the money out and started to count it. The stack of cash felt thick and seemed to be in all $100 bills. One thousand, two thousand, three thousand, the money seemed to never end. "Twenty thousand !" Simon exclaimed out loud in total disbelief

"Simon! What the hell are you doing in there?! Twenty thousand what? Boy, will you stop playing, and let's go!"

"Hold on one minute, I'm coming." Simon's head was spinning as he held on to the sink; he had never held or seen that much money at one time in his life. "Shit, what should I do? He thought. "Did this money belong to someone? Of course, it does stupid! Should I take it for myself, bring it to the precinct? I mean, this could be the answer to my mom's prayers right now.

Knock knock knock

"Hey! Are you talking to yourself?? What the hell is going on? Open up, Simon!"

He opened the door. "Barb, I have to tell you something."

She gasped as she looked down and saw the money in his hand.

"Where the hell did you get all that money from? Simon? I hope you haven't been hanging out with those guys that stay outside all day! Are you? You better tell me right now I'm not playing with you!"

"I found it," Simon replied, still in shock.

"You found it? So you were just walking around, and a pile of money, twenty thousand dollars! was just sitting there ready for you to find. ?" Barbara asked

"Well, yeah, kind of. It was in a little black book at the bottom of the staircase of my building."

"Wait a minute, did you say in a black book? Let me see it. What's in it?" she said

He took it out, realizing that he had completely ignored the book up until this point. "I have no idea, honestly; once I saw the money, that was it for me!" He chuckled

She took the book in her hand and opened it. Her eyes widened up at the first page.

"Whoa, you've got to see this! This book has all the tea on people in the neighborhood, and it's piping hot!! We know most of these people. This is a little blackmail book!"

Simon peered over her shoulder. The first page read; "Mr. Granville is very handsome but very arrogant! He was rude to me for the last time. Every day at 530 pm, he stops at that little video porn shop on 7th avenue to watch 25 cent hookers before he goes home! I bet his wife won't like that too much, neither will the company he works for!" Then in red ink under it was written 10k sucka!

"Mr. Granville was our elementary school teacher; he lives right by the park. My mom and I still see him at the supermarket," Barb said

"And whoever wrote that said Sucka! Who talks like that?" said Simon laughing.

"An old-timer for sure! But who?" Said Barb

"Hmm, I don't know, but I'm thinking, it's kind of sketchy that Mr. Granville is going to one of those nudie video shops, but maybe we should give him back his money anyway. I don't know about all this, Barbara," Simon said

"Well, I doubt he'll miss that money. My mom had mentioned that he's a dean at the local community college. They make a decent amount, I guess," said Barbara.

They continued to look through the pages, all with similar profiles. There were about 6 altogether, but only 3 of the profiles had a sum of money with red ink under them. Looks like they didn't intend on stopping until you found their book.

"Yea look at the next one," said Simon

Maria Baker 7k Serves her right, that Hussie! Ms. Baker doesn't only sell knitted hats on that street; she's selling a whole lot more than that! that's the end of your nickel and dime bag business since you tried to kiss that pastor!"

"Whoa, not the hat lady!" She's outside of my building every single day; she's super sweet!" Simon replied

"Yeah, I know her too! I bet she probably puts those "extra goods." in those tiny pockets she sows on the stuff she makes," Barbs said, laughing, "unbelievable!"

"Look at the last person she got money from," said Simon.

"Not Rick Johnson! It says Rick Johnson; that's the guy that lives right down the hall from you, right Simon? Well, they got him for 3k," Barbara continued. "Rick is a good boy, but he needs to pay me back, and I'm tired of waiting. He won't be too thrilled that I know that he and his friends are fighting for money in the basement of that boxing gym downtown. What does he think this is? Fight club? I bet he'll pay me back now".

"That equals the 20k," Simon said. "10 from Mr. Granville, 7k from Mrs. Baker, and 3k from rick. Twenty thousand worth of bribery money!"

"I wonder who the hell is doing this and getting away with it!" Said Barbara

"Now, normally, I would definitely ask for a half of the money, but I know how tough it has been for you lately, so I think you should keep it," said Barbara

"So you don't think I should feel guilty and return it? I mean, the things all of these people are doing are suspect, to say the least, but, come on, we know them."

"We are not giving this money back! You need it! And they won't miss it, and don't you think twice about it!" Let's go pick up our gowns from the school, and you just take the money home." Barbara replied

A few hours later...

Simon came through the door while his mom was busy setting the table, and the house was filled with the smell of a home-cooked meal. "Mom, I have something to tell you." Simon began

His mom looked up from what she was doing. "Well, what is it, baby? I hope it's good news cause I had quite a terrible day. I lost something very important to me, you wouldn't even imagine!"

"Don't worry about that, Ma, I have something for you," Simon said as he handed her the twenty thousand, which was now in a white envelope that he got while he stopped by his school. His mother opened it and nearly passed out; she grabbed the chair in front of her for support. She started counting the money. "Twenty thousand dollars!" His mom started tearing, "Boy, where did you get this?"

"Well, I know this may be hard to believe, but I found it at the bottom of the stairs in our building."

"Was it with a little black book?" his mom asked.

"Ummm, yes it was, but how did you know that?"

"Give it here baby, I hope you didn't read into it too much. I've been looking for that thing all day! Don't you worry about a thing, you hear me? With this, all of our bills will be paid. I'll be back on my feet in no time! I told you not to worry! I don't ever want to hear about it again, got it! Now sit down and eat!"

And they did just that.