The Golden Rule of Gift Giving

Birthday gifts are given to individuals on their birthdays. Wedding gifts, retirement gifts, and graduation gifts are given only to a select number of people at different times. Mother's Day gifts are given only to mothers and mother figures in May. The same thing happens with fathers and father figures in June. However, Christmas is the only time when more gifts are given by more people on the same date.

Gifts say a lot about the giver, and they should convey how the giver esteems the receiver. It is better to give gifts that show you care and have put some thought into the selection.

Try Not to Give a Grab-and-Go Gift

Some people grab anything to give on special occasions. That's why some stores have gifts near the cashier so last-minute shoppers can grab and go. If you want to buy a gift from 7-Eleven, Wawa, or any other convenience store, still put some thought into it.

Give What You Would Like to Get

A very good idea is to give a gift that you would like to receive yourself. For that reason, some people buy two of the same item. One is to give away to someone, and the other is to keep for themselves because they value the gift.

Gifts Not to Give

A survey was conducted, and participants cited gifts they received that offended them.

1. Gifts from hotels: One person said she was offended when her sister gave her those little bottles and tubes of lotion and shampoo she had collected from hotels. The little bottles had no brand name, but they had the hotels' logos on them for advertising. It was obvious that the giver had not put much thought into the gift selection.

2. Regifting of the same gift: Another person insisted that the scarf she had given her friend for her birthday in June was regifted to her as a Christmas present.

3. Gifts from conventions. A third person was a little concerned when his friend gave him “goody bag gifts.” Those were things he had received himself from conventions and conferences over the year. The gifts included ballpoint pens with company logos, notepads, and other samples.

4. A used photograph album. This actually happened to me. A close friend gave me a used photograph album he had picked up from a thrift store. The pages were dirty, and the album still contained photos from the previous owner.

Gift Suggestions

It should be easy to select the perfect gift when you know the recipient. If you have spent significant time with someone, you know something about the person, including likes and dislikes. It would not be a welcome gift to give someone a fruitcake if you know he doesn't like fruitcakes. Besides, he might be a diabetic.

Rather than giving someone an unappreciated gift, ask the person for some choices. It will still be a surprise because the person won't know which one on the list you will choose.

Kids do it all the time. They give their parents a list of items they want. Before computers, children used to search through catalogs and give their parents the page numbers of gifts along with photos and descriptions. Today, companies have a “wish list” on their websites for what people really want as gifts.

The Golden Rule says, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” That goes for gift giving, as in other areas of your life. Since that is the case, put some thought into the gifts you give. Don't give something you would not like to receive yourself.

Do Not Give

• little bottles of lotion and shampoo from hotels
• the same gift to the person who gave it to you
• “goody bag gifts” from conferences and conventions
• a used and dirty photo album with photos of the previous owner