The Delusion of “Being Late” in Our Mid-Twenties

Somewhere in our mid-twenties, as we move towards practical life, a quiet pressure settles in. It doesn’t arrive loudly or start to haunt instantly. It creeps in through comparison, timelines, and expectations we never consciously agreed to. Suddenly, we feel that we are behind others who started the race with us. This belief, though common, is one of the most damaging delusions of our generation.

I call it a “Bubble of Delusion” because it is not rooted in reality. It is imprinted in our minds and thoughts through the mechanisms of the senses and observation. We look, hear, feel, and then make conclusions on the success of others and the drawbacks of oneself. We do not understand that we are not on the same page in life.

Society sells a very narrow definition of success: by 25, you should be financially stable; by 30, settled; by now, certain. Nowadays, everyone is looking forward to this successful frame of life. If you do not fit this criterion, you are unconsciously considered a loser. A young man entering into practical life and instantly facing these sorts of limitations would undoubtedly be a victim of anxiety, depression, and social criticism.

Anyone who falls outside this linear path is treated as a failure in progress.

What society ignores is that most people in their mid-twenties are still figuring things out emotionally, professionally, and mentally. They do not have built-in data to process and work accordingly. They have to go through things to be mature enough to be a successful person.

Yet we still suffer the vague taunts and nonsense.

The problem isn’t confusion. The problem is shame.

We are made to feel guilty for not having clarity, as if uncertainty is a flaw rather than a natural stage of growth. Any mistake that happens leads to mental trauma, not because of the mistake, but because of the criticism and hatred. Social media amplifies this illusion. We see curated success stories, promotions, engagements, visas approved, lives “sorted.” What we don’t see are the unpaid internships, the rejections, the anxiety attacks, the nights spent questioning self-worth.

Our society also plays a vital role in making life somewhat difficult. Difficulty doesn’t come only from a lack of money or jobs. It also comes if you are not treated well. If you are criticized by people around you, it slowly drains the youth out of you. This slow poison turns out to be fatal and kills a person from the inside. When you are judged on your failures instead of your struggles, growth, patience, and goodness. You start to break, and it leads to a breakdown at some point.

And slowly, comparison turns into self-criticism.

For many of us, this period coincides with real struggles, especially us people who are middle-class and are suffering from financial and family issues. Visa refusals, financial instability, academic delays, family pressures, isolation, lack of jobs, and low wages with high workloads, or simply watching others move ahead while we feel stuck. Society rarely acknowledges these realities. Instead, it labels struggle as laziness and patience as incompetence.

We are never judged because of our struggles, but for our success. Although one should not ignore that in a person’s life, luck, mental capabilities, and physical capabilities play a vital role in success.

What we need instead is realism.

Growth is not linear. Progress is not synchronized. The truth is, struggling does not mean you are failing at life. It often means you are building it without shortcuts.

Our generation is not broken — it is overwhelmed. Being lost or being slow doesn't mean you are weak or at a dead end. Every successful person has been through rough times. We are navigating unstable economies, inflated expectations, and constant comparison, all while being told to “figure it out” quickly. That contradiction alone is enough to exhaust anyone.

I think and believe that if a man is treated well, in his downs, encouraged and helped to grow and keep doing what he is doing. It is necessary to have some people around you who understand you and who believe in you. If you are able to find only one or two people like that in your life. I bet you can succeed in life.

If there is one thing I’ve learned, it’s this: your pace is not a problem. Your confusion is not a defect. And your worth is not determined by how closely you match society’s timeline. All you need to do is be consistent in your work.

Sometimes, surviving this phase is an achievement in itself.

And that deserves recognition.