The Beginning of Ben and Maria

From the first moment, Ben was awestruck. Since the age of 15, he had begun to keep a strange Little Black Book of what he someday desired in a wife. Not a book of “big goals”, but a book of little details that had simply been thoughts, that he would sketch down over time. Then in this one moment, all those thoughts and sketches began to become reality on this warm January Eve.

As dreamt, she stood 5”7’ tall, long brunette eyes, and the perfect dancer body. Many details were being checked off the list, then they would begin to converse. Maria sitting in her perfectly tight designer jeans, her yellow blouse, with the perfectly tied scarf bringing attention to her face and eyes. As the conversation would unfold, more details would be checked. For she grew up on a horse ranch but was citified. She was a dancer at a ballet studio. She came from affluence but not arrogance, as a matter of fact, just the opposite. And, stepping out of her car he watched her intently. As she left the car, that he had sketched in his Little Black Book when he got his driver's permit, he was wondering, “Surely, I’m not going to just go for it over a car?”

Maria was shy, but in awe as well. Could this be the one? She had many chances, to date many guys, to do many things, but she always patiently waited for a moment like this to unfold and unfold it quickly did.

After a short 8 months of dating Ben, unromantically, popped the question, Maria quickly said, “Yes.” With tears of excitement flowing down her face. In just another 5 months they would exchange their vows, start the journey of a lifetime, and all the details in the Little Black Book were becoming reality. So, it was time for “their” dreams and sketches now. Including kids, service to others, and dreams of experiences that would shape a lifetime. What they didn’t write was the “surprise” Ben’s grandparents had planned.

On the evening of the rehearsal dinner Ben’s “Big Dad and Granny” came over for a hug. It was a hug that would shape decades and thousands of lives, as they handed Ben and Maria an envelope. Inside the envelope was a letter of encouragement and a check for $20,000!! Now the dreams and the sketches would begin.

The Little Black Book was full of ideas from down payments on a house, to the perfect exotic honeymoon, to cars, and the list went on. But in the end, all of those were skipped for one word, “Legacy.” So as they went on the cheap motel honeymoon for two whole nights, drove thousand-dollar cars, and lived in a 600 sq foot single-wide trailer, they would begin to sketch in their book what $20,000 means to the word “Legacy” in the Little Black Book of dreams.

Maria one night sat up in bed and exclaimed, “Let’s do it!” Ben was thrilled and ready to go, but Maria began to speak. “What do we have to lose?” Ben thought, “A moment to rock the 680 SF of the single-wide!” But quiet, shy Maria grabbed the Little Black Book and began to dream write. The words read, “Take the surprise gift of $20,000, honor your grandparents 60 years of marriage, by investing it until our 20 anniversary, the choosing how to use it to serve others.” While not the same as “rocking the trailer”, it was a legacy thought that gave direction and purpose for their first two decades together.

On the morning of their 20th, they woke up, reviewed their dream book, and called their investment manager. For the first time in 20 years asking how much the “surprise” account had managed to grow. As they both listened, holding hands, while they were on speakerphone, they began to laugh, smile, cry, and stare at each other in awe. The big surprise 20 years ago had now left a legacy of over a 20-time return, leaving them well over $400,000 in cash! The temptations of houses, cars, lost honeymoons, etc would invade their mind, but they opened the Little Black Book, read their dreams, reviewed their sketches, and started on the adventure of a lifetime. An adventure of legacy.

How to do it they didn’t know, but what to do they did, so they began to take steps towards those dreams. The dream of continuing to let their investment grow, while at the same time, investing a “legacy” into 20,000 other couples before their 40th wedding celebration. Surely by then, they would get to also “rock the single wide.”

Starting with investing 50% of the gift again, they took their second step. Sending 5,000 couples a letter of encouragement and hope, including a seemingly insignificant gift of a “Little Black Book.” With an inscription on the front page simply saying, “Dream big. Live small. Write and sketch. And believe in the impossible. Because we’ll do it with you, and it works. We believe in you – Ben and Maria.”

As the years trailed on the daily rewards worth nothing short of all-consuming. Sure, as always with success, there were the haters who tried to dissuade them, mock them, make false accusations about them, but the dreams in that Little Black Book would continue to pass on. Each wedding celebration would be a moment of reflection. On their 25th, their kids were in college, marrying their own Little Black Book dream mates, and receiving surprises of “legacy gifts.” With one stipulation written in their handwritten letters, “How do you invest in others for a lifetime? Here is your new Little Black Book for you as a family, instead of just you as an individual. Write your legacy plan. Dream big. Live small. Write and sketch. And believe in the impossible. Because we’ll do it with you, and it works. We believe in you We love you – Mom and Dad.”

Now by their 30th celebration, not only was it Ben and Maria serving others for a legacy, all three of their kids, and the two with their dream spouses were investing in the same goals. Changing lives, marriages of all types of diversity, families, and individuals for a lifetime. One of the kiddos realized that if she invested in college-age students as they were “looking for love in all the wrong and right places”, that she could possibly save thousands of adults, and children, the heartache of troubled homes.

It had now become time for Ben and Maria’s 40th wedding celebration. The event center/retreat center they had begun with the purpose of teaching couples how to “Live a legacy”, was full of thousands of people. But there was one table upfront. On it sat the original Little Black Book from when Ben was dreaming of marrying for a car, the book they began as they married and received their surprise gift, and a book of endless stories. All the stories mentioning an encouraging letter, and a surprise gift of a “Little Black Book: to write down their dreams. As Ben and Maria walked through the crowd they were once again crying, smiling, and laughing, as they reflected on what one act of generosity and a Little Black Book had produced. As big as they dreamt, they never thought they would be walking through their retreat center in the heart of the Vail Valley, the Aspens all around, and the snowflakes falling with purity. As the flakes were blowing in their faces, it became very easy for them to blow off all their hurt, and focus on the pleasures of living a life of written purpose in a small Little Black Book.

After working through the crowd, holding hands, they made it to the flower-covered tabled when their Chief Executive handed them a new Little Black Book and two letters.

The first letter read, “Dear Ben and Maria when we wrote you 40 years ago, when we were still on planet earth, we both had full confidence that you would invest wisely, choose legacy, and sketch your dreams. As you look at the next letter, know how proud of you we are for dreaming big, living small, never letting hurt stop you, and continuing the legacies that can start with one act of generosity and a Little Black Book. We love you and are proud of you – Granny and Big Dad.”

With tears streaming down their face, their kids gather around, took the second letter, and began to read aloud. “Dear Mom and Dad – Thank you for forty years of a lifestyle of hope over hurt, impact over stuff, and simply believing in us and others. What if people will focus on writing their dreams, be more committed to fun than anger, forgiveness more than grudges, and adventurous passion over ‘growing old’ that it changes family trees forever. That being said, as of today, know that your surprise investment of $20,000 has now invested over $20 million into families, as others have matched your sacrificial dreams written in yours and their Little Black Books. You have directly impacted over 200,000 diverse marriages, are credited for saving over 20,000 marriages and have inspired over 40,000 high school and college students to believe in their “Beginning” as they receive an encouraging letter. We love you and are proud of you. Thank you for never letting the disappointment and hurt that other cause stop you! We love you, appreciate you, and are always proud of you. Your favorite kids Charles, Teddy, and McKenzie Elizabeth. Keep sketching, giving, and believing in the impossible. You taught us how one sacrificial gift and a Little Black Book can create a Legacy Family for a lifetime. Thank you. We’ve rented you a single wide in the middle of Vail so you can go live your dream of ‘rocking the single wide.”