Relationship problems without being in one

I'm sure most of you have experienced this at least once by now, and it's not a great experience to say the least. If you haven't, well the title pretty much explains it. Not to be biased but most of the time it's because guys have commitment issues. Either their last relationship messed their trust up, they don't want to go through the 'stress' again or they're too immature to settle down with one person. Whatever the reason may be, it doesn't end well for us.

Someone comes along and we have no intention of being with them. We remain friends, talk all day every day, go out with them, do errands with them, call them and make memories with them. Until one day you realise you aren't friends anymore. You've built such a strong bond with them that you've fallen for them. Now you're telling your friends about him, you want to tell your family, you're buying him gifts just to see a smile on his face, you're always free when he wants to go out and it's an amazing feeling. You think he feels the exact same way. Not because it's your mind telling you that but because of the way he's acting. The way he asks about your day, pays attention to your life, compliments you. All of these vibes he's putting out but it was never real to him.

He led you on for months maybe even a year and eventually you catch on so you start to ask questions, have serious conversations with him but he cuts them short or changes the subject and that's when he starts to act differently. He thought that he could have all the benefits of being in a relationship and having someone special just to himself without being in one but now that he knows you've caught on he's acting differently. He's not complimenting you anymore, he doesn't text first or call, he doesn't care if you haven't talked all day, he doesn't make plans to see you anymore, he's distant. He hasn't left yet because he's not ready to let go of all those benefits you're giving him but he doesn't need to try anymore because he knows how you feel about him and he can take advantage of it.

Although you can see all of this happening right in front of you, you're choosing to ignore it, all these red flags, you're choosing to ignore them because you only see the good in him, you only see the side of him you fell in love with and so you think that he'll change and things will go back to the way they were at the start. You keep telling yourself this, whilst you cry at night because of the pain he's putting you through and you keep telling yourself this whilst you're looking at yourself in the mirror telling yourself to remain strong because he just needs a bit longer. One day you wake up and realise that he's never going to change. How long has it been now? A year? And you're still waiting for him? Waiting for what sis? He's never going to commit, he's never going to change, and he's never going to love you. He played you and as harsh as it sounds it's the truth. You gave that boy you're all and it wasn't enough, he didn't appreciate it. So what are you doing? Stop crying and stop praying that he'll come back because he doesn't deserve you, not even a single bit, someone will come along one day who will appreciate every little thing about you and that's when you'll look back and be thankful that it didn't work out but right now you need to focus on you. Start to better yourself, that confidence that he knocked down, built it right back up, put your all into working on that revenge body and get that bag sis. You don't need him, you don't need no one, you're doing just fine on your own so you do you, achieve them goals, don't let anyone get in your way and if another boy comes into your life, act wisely this time, learn from your mistakes and don't make them again. Be happy sis, you deserve it.