Psychologists: children "inside the cross, outside the goat", most of the father and related

Many people think that a child's character can be judged by his words and actions, but this is not absolute. Nowadays, most parents spoil their children, so there may be contrasts in their personalities. It is common to see "stubborn in the nest, timid outside".

Many moms in the baby mama group struggle with this. When children are in school, they are obedient and don't dare to get into trouble. When they are praised by their teachers, they come home and become very cranky. At the slightest dissatisfaction, they start throwing tantrums and the family has to be around it.

Although the parents are the closest people to the child, the child can relax better in front of them. If only the occasional tantrum is understandable but always shouting, the parents can not stand it.

Many baby mothers feel the same way. The child is very dominant at home, but very timid when it comes to strangers. Even if they are bullied by other children, they are afraid to fight back and are punished at home. What's the problem?

Most of the child's problems are related to the father's usual performance.

1. Excessive indulgence of the child

Now that living conditions are better, parents want to give their children the best, and can not bear to let the child suffer any aggravation. There is nothing wrong with loving your child, but overindulgence is harming your child and will make your child selfish and can't take a hit.

Such children are arrogant in front of their parents, to the outside became very timid, do not dare to resist the teacher and even dare not quarrel with the child, only to let people bully.

Many parents say that they can't discipline their children at all and can only let the teachers take them. But at home, what the child wants, the parents can meet, and once not satisfied, will be unreasonable.

Teachers at school don't care that much. They treat all children equally. If they make a mistake, they will be punished. Parents also need to set rules for their children instead of just satisfying them, otherwise, it is easy to form such a character.

2. children imitate their father's behavior.

It makes sense that the kind of character a person has is mainly related to the environment he lives in, especially for growing children. In the beginning, a child is just a blank sheet of paper and learns most of his behavior from his parents.

If the father is always grumpy at home but stays quiet when he goes outside, the child learns the same way. They mistakenly think that people should be like that, so if parents fight a lot, the child will be grumpy and will not have a good personality later.

3. Dad does not do things strictly.

In the eyes of the child, the father is majestic, so some children in front of the mother are very disobedient, but the father became very well behaved, but some fathers in doing things or education of children are cheeky, little serious expressions are not.

Because of the father's long-term attitude, the child feels the matter is not important and does not pay attention to anything. They listen to what they say and then forget about it, and at home, they will act like they don't care.

But the outside world is strange and not all people do things with cheeky smiles. Some people are especially strict and children become timid because they see that they will have a sense of fear.

Faced with such a child, how can parents help correct it?

1. Know how to let go

It is because the parents hold the child too tightly, the child lost the opportunity to contact the outside world, and there is no way to adapt to the unfamiliar environment. Parents can only change their character if they know how to let go.

2. Uniform Education

A child's education cannot rely on teachers alone. Parents are the earliest teachers of their children. However, when it comes to educating children, parents should be united and not let the elderly blindly spoil their children. Before educating children, parents should greet, them so that they will not stop education because of the heartache of the child, resulting in the unity of education, and can not achieve the effect of education.

3. Social skills

Parents have to develop their children's social skills, children can also change bad habits. Some children are afraid of socializing. Parents should talk to their children more often to overcome this mentality so that children can better communicate with people and integrate into the group. At the same time, children should also learn to understand others, so that they can understand their parents, and not be too domineering at home.

Parents should pay attention to their children's "stubborn in the nest, timid outside" situation. If a child keeps this kind of character for a long time, it will be difficult to achieve something in the future. However, when parents educate their children, they should also take the right approach to education, find out why the child will have such a character, and target education, to solve the fundamental problem. In addition, parents should set a good example for their children, especially fathers, so that their children know how to be responsible men.