Once Upon a Boy Band

Kaylee Henderson thought that she was just buying a ten-dollar bottle of Merlot at the supermarket right before heading home for the night. After two glasses, she mindlessly scrolled through her social media accounts for a sense of purpose, only finding ads for shapewear and too many heated opinions about world politics. Before clicking off for the night, she saw one of her favorite influencers was having a giveaway for a one-on-one meeting with the up-and-coming boy band Kiss & Tell, the members of whom could have easily been her little brothers fresh out of college. A giggle bubbled out of her mouth before she added a comment of her own: These boys look delicious enough to eat! And of course she had to add a string of heart-eyed emojis for good measure. Only after sharing the post for the giveaway did she sink back against her sheets and fall into a dreamless slumber.

The next day...

Waking up with brain fuzz, Kaylee yawned and reached for her phone, which had fallen onto the floor. A grumble later, she checked for any notifications. Her eyes widened to find her phone had blown up with texts, emails, and social media alerts.

Kaylee, since when are you a fan of Kiss & Tell???

OMG, Aunt Kay-Kay, you little SNEAK, how did you steal away my only chance to meet my ultimate bae?! NO FAIR.

Kaylee, it's your mother. Aren't you a little too old to be meeting up with boys in a band? You're not a teenager anymore.

And on and on it went.

The proof, of course, was the email she had received from the talent agency associated with the band. Wonder of wonders, she had won the chance to meet the band and hang out with them for a day. And all Kaylee wanted to do was crawl back into bed and pretend it was just a really vivid dream.

Of course, that didn't stop her from replying back that she would accept her prize in full.

The day of the meet-and-greet...

Kaylee had never been one for extravagance, but even she was wowed when she saw the hummer limousine sitting outside her apartment complex. Inside greeted her little spritzer bottles of booze (even though it wasn't even noon!) and a pretty little trinket box of fine chocolates. Even if she had to go home right then, at least she would be able to have a good night of indulgence with the alcohol and chocolate.

But as soon as the limo settled outside a nondescript office building—inconspicuous trappings indeed—she felt as if she might heave.

Who said meeting famous people like Kiss & Tell would be easy?

Enter the boy band...

The handler who retrieved her from the limo didn't say a word as they stepped into the other world of boy band infamy.

Van Erikson, Blue Williams, and Nash Kendrick stared at her as if she were some kind of banshee ready to screech at them. Van was dark and brooding in appearance, just like all his pictures, while Blue was the picture of 90's goth trapped in a time warp. Nash? He looked practically normal next to the other guys.

"Hi," Kaylee said, giving a little wave, but none of the boys returned her shy enthusiasm.

"I thought she was supposed to be a number 10 out of 10," Nash said, his voice lowered so little that Kaylee heard every word and blushed straight to the roots of her hair (which needed a touch-up from her hairstylist, now that she was reminded of her...lacking qualities).

"Who cares what she looks like?" Blue asked, folding his arms over his chest. She noticed he wore a long silver chain with a hanging skull pendant. He was supposed to be the "pretty boy" in the group, but Kaylee just couldn't see the appeal. Maybe she was just too old to take boys like him seriously. "I mean, all we have to do is take her out somewhere, right? We could even rent out a luxury hotel just so she can have a spa day and get out of our hair."

Van smirked. "You guys obviously have no sense of romance. Can't you tell she's wilting under our scrutiny?"

"Um, I'm standing right here and can hear everything you're saying," she mumbled. For being the hottest band at the top of the charts, these guys...weren't very nice at all. Hadn't they ever heard of smoozing the fans? Not that she was a fan, exactly, but still...

Van sighed in a dramatic fashion. "How about this? Rather than waste our time, we'll just take you out on a date."

Kaylee's eyes bulged. "All three of you? At once?" Her voice sounded especially squeaky in her own ears, so she could imagine the pitch level they, as musicians with keen ears, were hearing.

Blue was the first one to scowl at her. "If you think we're gonna take turns ravishing you, you've got another thing coming."

"What?" Now she sounded like a chipmunk or something.

Nash waved his hand impatiently. "Ignore him. He always wakes up on the wrong side of the bed."

"How about we take out the yacht?" Van asked, clearly ignoring any suggestions or recognition from his other bandmates. "It's supposed to be a lovely day for sailing."

One uncomfortable ride to the oceanfront later...

"I feel like I'm in a totally different world," Kaylee murmured, her eyes scanning the horizon as the sun beat down on her. After signing a non-disclosure agreement (meaning no pictures or video of any kind), she had gotten into a small bus with Kiss & Tell while their chauffeur handled the driving. None of the guys had even tried speaking to her on the way there. Her "perfect meeting" promise was seeming more and more like a sham.

"You're gonna get toppled by a wave," Nash said as he passed by her on the way to the docks. Rather than even try to cater to her as a contest winner, each of the boys just pretended like she was an extra piece of luggage they had meant to leave behind at home. If she could have tweeted right then, she would have confessed to the world that the "hot guys" of Kiss & Tell were just like any ordinary narcissistic men with egos the size of life preservers. The illusion would be shattered evermore, their album sales would plummet, and she would have the last laugh indeed...

"Hurry up," Blue said from behind her. She jerked in response. "You're holding us up."

Van smiled at her apologetically as he passed her, but that wasn't enough of a rebuke of his bandmates' actions for her taste.

The yacht was beautiful, though a bit on the outrageously oversized side to her. But who was she to judge? Kaylee wasn't sure she had ever even seen a yacht in real life to know what size was appropriate. But what did they say about men when it came to overcompensating when it came to size...?

That thought earned her what felt like her first smile of the day. She sat back in one of the lounge chairs, the sun beating down on her in a delicious way, and she could only think of how lovely this day might have been if only the boys of everyone else's dreams had been what she had met face-to-face herself...

A soft nudge startled her awake, only for her to see a pink-and-lavender sky setting in above her. She gasped and sat up, only to find Van sitting on the other lounge chair beside hers. Before she could stop the reflex, she wiped at her mouth and hoped she hadn't done something as mortifying as drooling on herself in front of this pretty, if totally unapproachable, boy.

"Some contest win, huh?" Van said, raising his eyebrows at her. "You fell asleep, and none of us wanted to disturb you."

"Er, thanks." I think? "Sorry for not being as...enthusiastic. I'm sure a lot of your other fans are younger and more...more..." She trailed off, unsure of what she had even been trying to get at with her garbled still-half-asleep words.

"You're definitely not our target demographic, that's for sure," he said, "but that doesn't matter. You won, fair and square. I guess I just wish you had gotten more out of it than a nap on the ocean."

"It was nice," she said, trying to people-please even at that moment. "And at least I get to see the sunset."

Van glanced behind him and then returned his gaze to her. "Sorry we were such asses," he said, his tone actually sounding truly apologetic. "This was just a silly thing our agency wanted us to do. For brownie points, I guess."

"Well, you have to make money somehow, don't you?"

Van's eyes crinkled as if he wanted to smile but thought better of it at the last moment. He stood and went to a wine bucket whose ice seemed to have melted much earlier in the day, and he pulled out the wet bottle from its cooling bath. Only once he had poured a glass did he hand it to her.

"A peace offering," he said. When she took the stem, she could feel the cold emanating from the glass.

She found herself smiling and took a sip of the wine. Her senses burst with the undertones of blackberry and a hint of spice. "Wow," she said. "This is better than that cheap Merlot I always buy."

Van actually chuckled at that. "I guess we owe you a redo," he said.

"A what?"

"Another date. This one didn't go according to plan, but we weren't the best hosts anyway."

"I'm a middle-aged lady past her prime," Kaylee said. "I just need the simpler things in life."

"Regardless, we could show you some wonderful things next time. If you want, that is."

With the sweet tang of the wine still on her tongue, Kaylee nodded. "Maybe I will take you up on that offer. Someday. Maybe when you're older."

The laugh she earned right then? It made the whole day worth it, even if she had napped half of it away. Some dates ended far more tumultuously.

Kaylee would take this as a win for "old ladies" everywhere.