Let's Celebrate a Beheading

I am confused. The entire world spends billions on a holiday, that should not even be such. Not one person, can tell me why they do, or why it is celebrated to begin with. I am taking about Valentine’s day. One of the biggest money makers for commercialism in the world. So, why do we take this one day a year to express love to our dearly devoted.

First of all, if someone is in a relationship, committed or otherwise, should those couples not show love, each and every day, to one another? Do we have to be reassured of a partner’s love, with chocolate, trinkets, jewelry and otherwise, flowers, and greeting cards? It seems idiotic to me really. Always has.

My husband and I don’t go nuts on Valentine’s day. We usually stay home. In fact, we make it a point to not go out. Restaurants are packed to the rafters, with couples proving their adoration by taking their loved one out to eat. Don’t they go out to eat any other time? What on earth makes this day better than any other? It’s really worse, if you ask me.

So called “ special” menus are just an eatery’s excuse to charge you more for a meal, that has a better opportunity of getting messed up, because of the volume of people they are serving that one day.

Then there is the dealing with all the crabapples that will undoubtedly be out and about, complaining about the waits, even though they had a reservation, not taking into consideration that people eat at their own leisure not anyone else’s. And no restauranteur is going to tell a table to hurry so another party can be seated. So you wait.

We, my husband and I make it a point to show each other love, every day. And spending cash does not equate love to me. No, instead, I make a delicious meal at home of one of his favorites, to show him I love and appreciate him. He does simple little things like that for me. He makes me bacon, basted with maple syrup, himself, and it tastes like no other. A lot of that taste is the enjoyment at the fact that he took the time to do it for me, and not buy it for me.

When we want to eat out we do. It does not have to be a special day or to prove love. It doesn’t prove love to me, but the bacon thing does. It’s all the little things all year long that we do for one another that prove and show love. Those things, like putting up a shelf I like, helping me with mundane tasks, like emptying the dishwasher, show appreciation and respect and honor for what I do in our marriage. He does it so I don’t have to. I do the same for him. I make suer he doesn’t have to worry about clean clothes, and that he has what he enjoys for the lunches, he takes to work.

I don’t ask for or require chocolates. Wait, I take that back. I do require chocolates, as a woman it is my entitlement in life. Chocolate. Even so, I never have to ask for them or wait for one day a year to get them. He knows my love of certain kinds and he often shows up with them or takes me to get them. Thoughtfulness. That shows love, and he doesn’t need a yearly barrage of commercials reminding him to be thoughtful. He does it on the daily. So do I.

Jewelry. The biggest push in the year comes on this particular month. Jewelers all over the country pay top dollars for advertising leading up to this lover’s holiday. They make a person believe that a rock shows love, that a necklace is what she what she wants. They manipulate men to make this day special with a proposal. How romantic. If a man, or woman for that matter, feels a sudden urge to become engaged, do it then. It is not any more special on this day than any other. The entire act is special. And I can tell you, I don’t even remember when, or how, or where, that happened for us. You won’t remember that, you’ll remember the words, the look in the eyes, and overwhelming feeling of love, but not if you had the seal or shrimp.

All of this hullabaloo was created by a little writer named, Chaucer. He romanticized the killing of Valentino. What on earth makes a beheading romantic? Does anyone even know the story? No, I have never met anyone that did.

Valentino was, for lack of a better word, an evangelist of Christianity. You atheists, can drop the holiday now. You are celebrating a Christian commemoration of a devout man of Christ. And since you do not believe in God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit, it would be hypocritical for you to celebrate the sainted preacher.

As for the rest of us, the story is not even remotely, a happy one, or something to celebrate, let alone romantic.

Valentino’s life work was to bring people to Christ. Yes he did a splendid job, and was committed to his mission. This landed him in jail a few times. The Romans, did not appreciate anyone professing God to the citizens, since Caesar was supposed to be their god. The capitals and non in the G’s are intentional.

Anyway, he went about, like John the Baptist, and got into hot water with the Roman gods, and so they went after him.

One time, he came before a judge that was skeptical. In order to possibly humiliate Valentino, or disprove anyone other than Caesar was god, he had his blind daughter brought before the man. The judge then told him to give her back her sight. Valentinus (Latin), prayed to God. Yes he prayed, to GOD Almighty, and laid hands on the girl. Guess what? Yup, her sight was restored. You skeptics, will still not believe in miracles. Good for you. I choose to believe, that sometimes something extraordinary happens that defies science. So for all intents and purposes, we will go with that. She saw.

The judge, released s, immediately, was he himself baptized and had his entire family and household (totaling 40) baptized. He had been evangelized.

Valentine was not to remain so fortunate. He again went about his usual preaching and got himself arrested again.This time, unfortunately, he came before a prefect, who would not be convinced to embrace christianity. He told Valentino (Italian), to renounce Christ, or he would be clubbed and then beheaded. My, my, those Romans were so, benevolent. Naturally, the evangelist, would not and he was martyred, just as he was told he would be.

Clubbed, beaten and then beheaded, how incredibly romantic. I can imagine the prefect looking at Valentine and thinking, in what way he could torture and slaughter this man, so he could created a day, where we can celebrate how romantic that was. Rubbish.

I would love to know what Chaucer was thinking, romanticizing such a gruesome event. Maybe he was a masochist and thought death in pain was sweet, for any reason. In fact, many writers equate love with tragic death or suffering. But is that romantic? I think it is sad and quite frankly, barbaric. Tragic, is the nicest word I’d use. But let me stay on track. We can discuss the celebration of Romeo and Juliet’s utter idiocy, in some other article.

Valentino has many myths or lore surrounding his martyrdom. All just theories, without verifiable documentation. There are generations of embellishments to his tales, but none were about love. Well maybe, except for his love for Christ.

Flash forward to modern times. Somehow we have all come to celebrate this tragedy, with candy (they probably, did no even have sweet confections, back in his day), with greeting cards, we then toss away (thank you trees, for your sacrifice), dinners out, for that valentine’s day special, and yes, let us not forget the flowers.

Flowers, that timeless demonstrative gesture of love. I get it. Let’s cut beautiful flowers off of their stems, give them to a loved one, to show the timeless love and dead and wilting beauty demonstrates. They are dead the second you cut them, people. Dead! How romantic. Not!

I told my husband right from the beginning, he would never have to buy me something so morose. In fact, I said if you have the inkling to buy me flowers, to buy me the plant, bulbs or seeds. The I can see them every year in their season and enjoy their beauty and sweet fragrances for weeks on end. Because yes I do love flowers. And so he buys me rose bushes. Each year I fall in love again and again, with the memories, of a long and loving relationship. He gets me.

Ladies, gentlemen, why not do something unexpected and surprising for your spouses or partners. Try not to just go with the crowd on everything. Be thoughtful and mindful of the person you spend the majority of your time and energy on, and DO something nice. That costs nothing, yet has the most value, a value you can’t even put a price tag on.