I Need a Breakthrough, God

I need a breakthrough, God.

Not tomorrow. Not next week. I need it now.

Because I’m tired, tired in a way that sleep can’t fix. Tired in my bones, tired in my spirit, tired of pretending like I’m not falling apart. I’ve been holding on to faith, even when it feels like it’s slipping right through my fingers.

I keep telling myself that all this pain must have a purpose. That every tear I’ve cried, every sleepless night, every moment I’ve had to force a smile when my heart was breaking, it has to be leading somewhere. But lately, I’ve been asking… where? Where is this “somewhere” I keep convincing myself exists? Because right now, it just feels like I’m stuck in the middle of a storm with no umbrella and no sign of the rain letting up.

I’m doing everything I can to stay strong. I show up for my kids, I keep the house together, I try to make something out of nothing. I speak life into everyone around me, but when it comes to me, I feel empty. It’s like I pour so much into other people that there’s nothing left for myself. And I know You see me, God. I know You hear me when I whisper those late-night prayers, when I cry quietly so the kids won’t hear. I know You see me when I’m sitting in my car after a long day, just trying to catch my breath before I go back inside and put on the “I’m okay” mask again.

But God, I need more than comfort right now. I need a move. I need You to open a door that’s been shut for too long. I need You to remind me that You haven’t forgotten me. Because sometimes it feels like You have. I see everyone else getting their blessings new jobs, new homes, stable lives and I celebrate them, I do. But then, when I’m alone, I can’t help but ask, What about me? When will it be my turn?

I’m not asking for perfection. I just want peace. I want to breathe without worry sitting on my chest. I want to wake up and not immediately start calculating bills or wondering how I’m going to make it through another month. I want to feel like life is moving forward instead of standing still.

Sometimes I think about all the things I’ve survived heartbreak, betrayal, loss, disappointment and I remind myself that I’m still here. That means something, right? It has to. Because if there wasn’t more meant for me, why would You keep waking me up every morning? Why would You keep putting dreams in my heart and visions in my mind if they weren’t meant to come to life?

So I’m asking again, from the deepest part of me, please, God.

Let this be the season where something shifts. Let this be the moment where You show me that all this waiting wasn’t in vain. Because I can’t lie, the waiting hurts. It makes me question if I’m doing something wrong, if I’m being punished, if maybe I missed my moment somewhere along the way. But then I remember, You’re not a God of confusion. You’re a God of timing. And even though I’m tired of waiting, I’m trying to trust that You’re still working behind the scenes.

Still, I need a sign. Just one. A reminder that You haven’t turned away from me. A whisper that says, Hold on, I’m still with you. Because sometimes that’s all it takes, just a small reminder that I’m not alone in this fight.

So God, I’m surrendering the fear, the frustration, the exhaustion. I’m laying it all down. I’ve done everything I can, and now I’m trusting You to do what I can’t. I know You specialize in the impossible. I know You can turn things around in a blink. And I know that one day, I’ll look back at this moment and realize it was all part of the plan, the breaking before the breakthrough.

But until that day comes, just hold me close.

Remind me that the pain is temporary.

And that the breakthrough I’m praying for is already on the way.

🎙️When She Speak