How to Safely Enjoy the Pandemic Holidays

"Surreal" is a word that always comes to mind. Life has felt like a different place for a while now, and it feels strange even during the holiday season.

After a year of self-sacrifice, the truth requires that we give up the traditions we love and distance ourselves from people we may feel have gone too far unnoticed.

And many roam the season with a sense of sadness - of lost loved ones, of lost purpose, and perhaps of despair.

Maybe not you. Perhaps you are full of gratitude for everything you have, and now you are very happy because of this epidemic.

And that, some days.

Some days I look across and feel no doubt blessed to have my health, my family, and all my needs met.

Some days, I feel the weight of these long, divisive months and mourn the lost time with my loved ones and family celebrations that I will remember with my parents and siblings, living together, across the country from me.

You can be in the same situation, deep as a pendulum between gratitude and sorrow. And you can argue about how to get into this season, in an orderly, mental and emotional way.

Whatever your unique situation, I hope this checklist will help you reach the next few weeks safely, peacefully, hopefully and happily, wherever you can build.

1. Caution

This is the biggest, and most difficult to swallow and follow. It has been a challenging year, marked by loss and heartache for many. We are tired of everything and want this epidemic behind us - but it is not yet over. So as we would like to be aware of the atmosphere and spend the year celebrating with all the people we love, we all need to do our part to protect ourselves and the people around us.

Not a very fun way to start this list, I know, but I thought I would cancel this trip!

If you haven't seen the CDC guidelines for holiday circles, you can find it here.

2. Communication

As I think you have experienced it, different people hold very different views on what it means to “be careful,” and some are willing to take great risks.

For example, my extended family met at least four different families on Thanksgiving — including some that are often crowded, some without masks - and will do so every Christmas. That’s a risk I wouldn’t be willing to take, but I’m also 3,000 miles away, so it’s a decision I shouldn’t make.

When considering family reunion, it is important to clarify where everyone stands, what precautions everyone takes in their daily lives, and what precautions they will take on the day itself. Do not assume that you know what anyone is thinking unless they make it clear to you, because you may be wrong.

3. Empathy

This can be difficult. When people make decisions that may seem unreasonable to you, or they force your beliefs on you, you may feel frustrated, frustrated, or even angry. It is difficult to distinguish a person from his or her preferences, especially if it involves something emotionally loaded like a pandemic, and it is difficult not to take it personally if their choice seems selfish to you.

I've been here lately, and I've taken it very seriously. I was angry, I criticized, I judged. What I did not do was change anyone's opinion, or in any way improve the situation. It dawned on me that I had a need for empathy for people who saw things differently. Although I would not make the same choice, I needed to understand the feelings behind them and focus on that.

This does not mean that we need to make decisions that we do not agree with, or that we risk compromising them in any way. It simply means that we accept what we can control and choose love over righteousness, no matter how reasonable it may seem.

4. Empathy

Circumstances have not been easy for you. Even if you are healthy, have a job and a roof over your head, and you have not lost loved ones, this year will probably have an impact on your mental health. I know it was taken seriously in the mine.

You may feel lonely, depressed, frustrated, impatient, or even depressed right now. You may also feel frustrated when you have to change your normal holiday plans, at a time when you can use more love, happiness and communication.

It's okay to feel frustrated. It’s okay to hear whatever you feel, even if you know you’re lucky. It is difficult to be away from the people we love, especially during the holidays, and we miss out on the traditions we treasure. Be extremely gentle with yourself and know that it is okay if your gratitude is mixed with a variety of complex emotions.

5. Acceptance

I know how tempting it is to dwell in the shadow of death every day, especially when things go wrong, or when things go wrong. I know how easy it is to get caught up in the rush of life.

What I do not know is what you have experienced directly or how you are feeling right now. So please know that I am not suggesting at all that acceptance is easy, or that I would be able to do it easily if I were in your shoes.

I can only talk about the common sense of acceptance, and how it frees us from the mind when we stop fighting the truth. I know that when we accept what we cannot control, we are free to focus on the things we can control and do better.

I also know that I feel better about who I am, and I eventually get better with life, when I come from a place of acceptance - even though it takes time to get there. I am a little light, very present, easily accessible to the people around me, and I may see opportunities where I once only saw injustice.

6. Vision

Like everything else in life, all of this is temporary. Things will not always be this way. These challenges, these feelings, will not last forever. Eventually we will get over this and we will be able to live freely. While life may not be exactly the same for many, we will find new common and new reasons to smile as we get used to life as it changes.

It would be hard to see that