How Hard Is It to Be Successful

This article is not about how to be successful. It is about your perspective on success and how it makes all the difference in the world.

Your definition of success

Let us start from a situation where you have a goal. Here is an example: I am in good shape and I want to do the proper muscle-up. I can do 15 pull -ups in a row, 150 in total. I am really close, but I still cannot do a muscle-up. Am I successful or not? One could argue: you haven’t reached your goal (yet), so you are not successful. Others could point out that 150 pull ups is a pretty good result and you should just persist until you reach the goal. Especially since it is so close.

What if you dreamed about becoming an actor when you were kid? And then even did some amateur theater plays? But then “life happened” and you became a mom, a wife and have a beautiful family that makes you happy. Does this count as a failure in your acting ambitions or are you happy with the life that you have?

Your definition of success is the measuring stick. If you want to become a millionaire, not reaching it in your lifetime would mean you failed. What if you had 900 000$ in your bank account and you know you cannot earn more than that? Are you still a failure?

Some people who are billionaires probably think about millionaires as failures. Most of us would disagree, but their standards could be that high. That is a legitimate choice, but the goal is very difficult to reach. Since many people today have reached it, it is not impossible.

But the only way to reach such a goal is to start with an extremely high standard of success.

If you want to be top 1 percent in any field, you have some serious climbing ahead of you. If you do not make it, you could get very disappointed. Or you can realize that it takes more than you are ready to give to reach that goal. Maybe you decided other things or people are more important to you than that “Mr. Top 1%” title. That is also OK. That does not make you a failure. Your priorities have changed, that is all.

3 Men in a tunnel

There is an old story about three men in a tunnel. The pessimist sees no light inside, only the darkness. The optimist sees the light at the end of the tunnel. The realist sees that the light is coming from the train. The train driver (the engineer) sees three idiots in the tunnel!!

You see, it is all a matter of perspective. You need to find the one that is right for you and follow it until the end.

Bottom line

We shouldn’t copy other people’s definitions of success. Just because it made their day, it doesn’t mean it will work for us. For example, I don’t want to be a millionaire!

Yes, having a million bucks sounds cool and you can have a lot of fun with it.

No, I don’t think money is bad and we should live in poverty.

My definition of success is having enough money for a comfortable life for me and my family. That does not mean earning millions, having yachts and jets. Those are other people’s goals, not mine. My focus is on having a successful career while doing some creative things. Achieving that will enable good earnings and a nice, comfortable life.

We should all follow our inner feeling (guidance) of what success means for us. That refers to all aspects of our life. Having role models is great but living their lives and fulfilling their ambitions is not the way.